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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23535616">delicate composition</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/blessedreylo/pseuds/blessedreylo'>blessedreylo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>10 Things I Hate About You AU, Antisocial People to Lovers?, Ben is Patrick, Blow Jobs, Dry Humping, F/M, Face-Sitting, Inspired by 10 Things I Hate About You (1999), Kaydel is Bianca, Oral Sex, Poe is Joey, Rey Kenobi, Rey and Kaydel are sisters and Obi-Wan is their hot single dad, Rey is Katrina, Rey loves photography, Reylo - Freeform, Reylo Modern AU, Soft Grunge Ben, Soft Grunge Rey, Vaginal Fingering, reylo au, rivals to lovers?, sorry there's no Cameron in this story because lets be real this is not about them, the smut is COMING, this was just my selfish excuse to write a 10TIHAY story because its my favorite</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:27:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>45,664</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23535616</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/blessedreylo/pseuds/blessedreylo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>a modern 10 Things I Hate About You inspired AU (emphasis on the word inspired, not a direct copy and paste of the movie)</p><p>*<br/>*<br/>*</p><p>Rey Kenobi is the the ruthless social curmudgeon of Kor Vella University living in the social shadow of her spunky younger sister, Kaydel. Their overprotective father has a rule: Kay can go anywhere and do anything if Rey does. The catch is Rey doesn’t give a rat’s ass about parties and boyfriends, so it’s a lose-lose situation for poor little Kaydel Kenobi. At the start of her senior year in college, Rey finds unlikely solace in the mysterious Ben Solo who has a reputation even more aloof than her own.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rey &amp; Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>157</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>289</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>favorite fics</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/WezyhxX">
    
  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Guys you know you'd better watch out </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em> Some girls, some girls are only about </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em> That thing, that thing, that thing </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em> That thing, that thing, that thing </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey blasts Lauryn Hill’s ‘Doo Wop’ at full volume as she cruises down the street on the way to campus. BB, her 1994 Ford Mustang Cobra, is sputtering all sorts of nonsense, but she can’t be bothered to deal with that now. That’s what she gets for buying a car older than the original Toy Story movie, but she had spent so long saving money she was willing to drive anything with four wheels and an engine. Anything to give her some semblance of freedom. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The fact that she’s a senior in college and still living at home is already enough to drive her to madness. Don’t get her wrong, she loves her Dad, and Dr. Obi-Wan Kenobi is one of the city's most respected neurosurgeons, but he can be a little...to put it mildly, <em> overprotective.  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then there’s her little sister Kaydel, a perfect little goody two shoes and the apple of her father’s eye. She’s only two years younger than Rey and yet she’s managed to rise the popularity hierarchy of Kor Vella University in record time. She scoffs at the idea of popularity; it’s just a pissing contest of who can buy the most expensive clothes, go to the most parties and make out with the most guys. Not that Dad really lets either of them do that stuff anyway, he’s got a simple rule: Kay can go anywhere and do anything if Rey does. The catch is Rey doesn’t give a rat’s ass about any of those things, so it’s a lose-lose situation for poor little Kaydel Kenobi. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey and her little sister are quite literally polar opposites. Kaydel is popular, stylish and upbeat, which are all qualities Rey rejects wholeheartedly.  Rey would like nothing more than wearing a baggy pair of jeans and sneering at the school spirit committee for even attempting to hand her a flyer. They rarely see eye to eye on anything and practically avoid each other on campus at all costs. Kay wouldn’t want to risk her precious little reputation over being associated with, and especially related to, the ruthless social curmudgeon that is Rey Kenobi. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>BB finally pulls up to Kor Vella and parks right outside the main gates. The beginning of Rey’s last year at KVU...it’s not as sentimental a reflection as she thought it would be, she honestly has no lasting memories of this place. When people boast about college being the best four years of their lives, Rey can’t count down the days fast enough until she is out of here so she can finally get out of the bubble of Corellia and explore the world around her. Create a new identity for herself outside of being Dr. Kenobi’s daughter and Kay Kenobi’s older sister. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She grabs her backpack and slings it over her shoulder, locking BB with a few beeps. She looks up to the red brick buildings and black cast-iron gates of KVU, surrounded by hoards of other students making their way to and from the gates. No one pays attention to her, she’s just a blip in the grand scheme of this campus, barely a face worth having a name. She has one friend, Rose Tico, who she met back in sophomore year in their creative writing seminar. She shares a similar level of social disdain and dubious outlook on life, but she also has a level of enthusiasm that’s worth bearing on a regular basis. She catches her petite friend sitting outside the library waving her down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“There you are! I was beginning to wonder if BB had finally gone to the big car dealership in the sky.” she quips, handing her a white coffee cup. Leave it to Rose to always come prepared for their 8am Feminist Theory lecture. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“She’s still trudging along for now.” she rolls her eyes with a chuckle. “New necklace?” she remarks suddenly, noticing the small circle pendant over her white t-shirt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She blushes slightly as she lightly places a finger on the pendant. “Oh yeah, Secret Admirer Guy gave it to me! Isn’t it pretty?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I still can’t believe you’re talking to a guy online that you’ve never met, don’t know what he looks like or even know his real name.” she sighs, crossing her arms. When Rose told Rey she started talking to this mysterious guy she met in a Reddit thread online she was sure she would have to rush her to Dad for an emergency brain scan. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t be jealous, Rey! It’s our last year here, maybe you’ll finally find your emo Prince Charming in a Nirvana t-shirt.” she chides, nudging her shoulder as they begin walking to Tyrena Hall for class. Rey scoffs with an eye roll; there’s no way in hell that this place has anything more than a Chad in Kappa Alpha Psi that can do a keg stand in under a minute. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A secret part of her loves the Disney fairytale idea of a ‘Happily Ever After’ but she’s realistic enough to know it’ll never happen. There’s no way there is a man (or woman) out there that can be as understanding, intelligent, confident and sexy as some fictional hero. She will most likely live the rest of her life as an old spinster in her father’s house forever.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey is grateful to her past self for taking all of her difficult courses already. There’s no way she has the mental capacity for more than Feminist Theory, Psychology 101 (yes, she forgot to take this elective her freshman year like she was supposed to but better late than never) and Advanced Photography in her last year of school. Rose has already left for her Quantum Mechanics lecture, so she heads to the courtyard to find a quiet place to read. On her way she happens to see Kay walking with a group of her friends, probably giggling about the most recent issues of Vanity Fair or whatever else egocentric people do. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>And speaking of egocentric people….Poe Dameron. Of course he’s already trying to get in Kaydel’s good graces, practically fawning over her like the love drunk imbecile that he is. He’s the textbook definition of a playboy, an aspiring model and comes from a family of rich restaurateurs. Rey should’ve known that he would try to leech off Kay but she doesn’t dare go near them to say anything, she’ll let her draw her own conclusion about that scumbag. She finally finds a shaded patch of grass against the large oak tree to sit and pick up her copy of Pride and Prejudice. Yet another example of unattainable romance that she loves to consume but almost certainly will never experience. She has about two hours until her Psychology class so she buries herself in the world of Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Some time passes before she can feel someone staring at her. <em> Fuck off </em> she thinks to herself, trying to continue reading. The words suddenly start to scramble in her brain as the searing feeling of a pair of eyes starts to distract her. No one ever notices her, and she’s glad about it. Maybe she’ll peek up for just a second…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her eyes dart up from over the weathered pages, scanning the surrounding courtyard. Nothing but groups of students chatting, walking, eating….</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And then her eyes lock onto a strange pair of dark brown ones. For a moment she only can focus on the eyes so intently staring back at her before she sees the rest of him. He’s sitting alone at a table about 15 feet away: dark wavy hair, broad shoulders, a uniquely structured face. She can tell he’s tall even though he’s sitting. He’s wearing a black t-shirt, black jeans and a dark red flannel shirt. His stare is intense and his expression is unreadable. She continues to stare at him in hopes that he will break and look away; she’s never shied away from a power move, so she furrows her brows slightly in an attempt to look more menacing. He continues with the same intensity and she feels her stare wavering before he finally breaks eye contact and looks off to the side.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> Looks like I win, </em> she gloats to herself with a smirk that is covered from him by the book. She looks back down at her book for a few moments, hoping for it to be the end of whatever the hell that was. She glances up again and he’s gone without a trace. Was he even there or was he some strange figment of her imagination? Rey huffs to herself... <em> well that was weird. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>God, that psychology professor is going to put Rey in a montone-induced coma. She can’t run up the stairs of the lecture hall fast enough as soon as he dismisses them, practically bursting out of the flood of people as soon as she passes through the door. After a few feet of walking she stops dead in her tracks, her eyes locking again with <em> his </em>. Okay, so maybe this guy isn’t a figment of her imagination but that doesn’t explain why he’s suddenly popping up everywhere. He’s leaning against one of the pillars in the outdoor corridor, looking at her with bold intent. Jeez, doesn’t this guy know it's rude to stare? She’s feeling a little brave at the moment, so she waltzes up to him to find what the hell this guys’ problem is. As she gets closer to him he can see his body language start to waver slightly, but his eyes never leave hers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Did you want a rematch or something?” she asks blatantly. He blinks down at her, almost perplexed at her question. He breaks the silence with scoff, running a seemingly large hand (what, how could she <em> not </em>notice?) through his hair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey, that wasn’t a fair win. I got...something in my eye.” He says dryly, almost passing off for humor. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hmm, how convenient.” she mocks with a smirk, crossing her arms over her chest. “Any reason you just happen to be outside my class?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Our class.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Wait, you’re in Psych 101 too?” Now it’s Rey’s turn to be perplexed. She thinks she would have noticed a large 6 foot something guy with long black hair in her class, especially after that little visual battle in the courtyard. “How come I didn’t see you?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I was late, snuck into the back. Not that a little teacher’s pet like you would’ve noticed sitting damn near the front row.” he quips with a smirk, looking off to the side for a moment. She takes this moment to acknowledge his side profile: a sharp jawline, abstract cheekbones, prominent nose, and a dusting of several moles across his stubbled face. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I am not a teacher's pet. I just knew he would be a total snooze fest so I sat where it would force me to pay attention.” she explains, not that she owes him an explanation. She doesn’t even know why she’s indulging him in this conversation, this is probably the longest conversation she’s had in months with someone who’s not Rose or her family...and she doesn’t even know his name. “Well, it’s been great talking to you…”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben.” he interjects. “Ben Solo.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben…” she repeats in confirmation, nodding her head. Why is he looking at her like that? She can’t discern his face at all, it’s almost as if his eyes are telling her everything but she just doesn’t know which language they speak yet. “I’m Rey. I guess I’ll see you around then.” she continues as she slings her backpack over her shoulder and starts walking away. He quickly but softly catches her arm with his hand, causing her to gasp slightly as she looks up at him. They’re practically shoulder to shoulder, his large hand almost fully wrapping around her upper arm.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll see you around, Rey.” he smirks darkly, letting his hand linger a little bit longer before releasing her. She doesn’t immediately start to walk again, almost frozen in time for a moment but then quickly regains her composure and walks past him. She can practically feel his eyes boring into the back of her head as she walks away, and she uses every bit of her not to turn back around. Whoever this Ben Solo is, he’s definitely...different.</p>
<p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'll be trying to create mini moodboards for each chapter so you guys can get my visual inspiration for the story, I hope you like them! feel free to follow me on twitter (@blessedreylo) for updates and more!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/jnbi8kw">
    
  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey Rose? What do you know about Ben Solo?” Rey asks, her phone sandwiched between her ear and shoulder. She’s currently trying to line up some new polaroids she shot over the summer onto the large photo collage wall in her room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben Solo? You can’t be serious! He’s trouble, Rey. I heard he skipped last semester because he was caught up in a drug ring.” Rose exclaims through the phone. She doesn’t really peg him as the druglord type, but then again she’s only interacted with him for less than 10 minutes. “And this rumor went around that he ate a live chicken...beak and all.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh c’mon Rose. I didn’t think you were so susceptible to the cesspool of campus gossip.” she chides, smoothing out her photo of the Coronet City Museum to the wall. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay yeah maybe that one’s a little bit contrived but still. I mean just look at him, he looks like he could break a log in half with his bare hands.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey’s mind betrays her for a moment as she recalls the size of his hands, the expanse of his chest through his fitted black shirt -- no, she can’t think like that. She barely knows the guy, and Rose is right that he looks like bad news. She brushes any delusions out of her mind, trying to focus on lining up another museum photo.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well forget I asked then. Rose, I gotta go I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” she sighs, saying her goodbyes with Rose before hanging up. She tosses her phone onto her bed and groans into her hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“Kaydel sweetie, I wish you would wait until after dinner before trying to give me heart palpitations.” Dr. Kenobi remarks at the dinner table. Rey scoffs, pushing her chicken and potatoes back and forth across her plate. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But Dad, it’s just a little get together tomorrow! Just a few friends, no big deal!” Kaydel exclaims with a pout. She’s making yet another valiant attempt at a social life but Dr. Kenobi is never one to stray away from his rules.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“First of all, I wasn’t born yesterday. I know that your little ‘get together’ means some kind of rager party with alcohol and people getting jiggy with it.” Dad warns, earning a chuckle out of Rey. Her father isn’t even that old, but he is a little out of touch with the current social norms and slang. “Secondly: is Rey going? Kaydel, you know if Rey doesn’t go you’re not going.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey shakes her head quickly as she chews on a piece of chicken. She would never subject herself to the sweaty, incoherent imbeciles of her university campus any more than she already has to. Kaydel looks like she’s about to blow steam out of her ears, quickly standing up from the dinner table and storming out of her room. Rey can hear her mutter angrily to herself before promptly slamming the door of her room. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Dr. Kenobi sighs to himself as he begins to clear the plates from dinner. Rey helps him quietly by handing him dishes as he begins to wash them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So, I got something in the mail from Coruscant’s Global Photography Program…” Dad starts. Rey lets out an excited squeal, quickly dropping (but thankfully not breaking) a plate on the counter before running off to the table by the door. She tears the envelope open, hastily scanning over the words before letting out a shocked gasp.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I made it to the next round of interviews!” she squeals, clasping her hand over her forehead. Not only is this the most prestigious photography program, but it guarantees total access to travel around the world and leave the hell hole of Corellia.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s great, darling. But Coruscant is pretty far. I thought we decided about you trying for the local programs here?” her father's voice is wary, causing her to look up from her letter in bewilderment.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, that’s what you decided…” she begins to say, fully ready the verbal sparring she’ll have to endure with her father before his hospital pager beeps. He looks up to read its message before sighing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We’ll talk about this later.” He points to her as he walks around, kisses her temple and makes his way for the front door. She sighs to herself, picking up a plate and resuming the dishes.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey pushes her way through the crowded corridors of Crevasse Hall after her Advanced Photography class. She’s glad this is her only class for today, and she can spend the rest of the afternoon applying the techniques from today’s lecture. She pulls out the camera from her backpack and tosses the strap around her neck. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>There’s a lot of things she detests about Kor Vella: the obnoxious student body, the way they prioritize greek life (as if it will mean <em> anything </em>after college), the vending machine in the library always being out of Dr. Pepper…but one thing she can always appreciate is the campus itself. The intricate architecture of the brick buildings and the fact that it’s completely surrounded by green landscape makes for great photographic inspiration. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She walks to the southside of campus, reveling in the rose garden created by the botany club (<em> scoff </em>, what the hell kind of club is that?). She can vaguely see a few people sitting on the stone steps on the opposite side of her but she doesn’t pay them any attention, popping the lens cap off her camera and testing the focus on a group of eden roses. She snaps a couple test shots, relatively happy with them before moving down the towering bushes. Rey is completely enthralled in her work; she doesn’t hear heavy footsteps approach her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey,” a deep, almost booming voice says from behind her. She gasps in surprise, quickly spinning around to glare at whoever dares interrupt her. Her breath hitches in her throat at the sight of familiar dark eyes looking back at her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, it’s you…” she clasps a hand across her chest jokingly in an attempt to soothe her rapidly beating heart. “You know for a guy I saw for the first time yesterday, you seem to be popping up everywhere lately.” she jokes, putting a hand on her hip.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He’s wearing a white t-shirt donned with a leather jacket and the same black jeans. For a moment she thinks he looks like Danny Zuko from Grease, a microscopic part of her truly appreciating the ensemble. He chuckles at her joke.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, I didn’t know you’re into photography.” he muses, looking over to the camera in her hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, you didn’t know me until yesterday so…” she remarks a little more harshly than she intended. He frowns momentarily before regaining himself. Is she supposed to feel bad about that? That’s how she talks to everyone, if she even talks to them at all. She shouldn’t feel bad…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s true. Can I see your photos?” he asks warily, pushing his hand through his hair. She shouldn’t feel anything when he does that but it just does <em> something </em>to her, she just doesn’t dare find out what that something is. She shrugs, turning her body slightly so he can look at the viewfinder of her camera from over her shoulder. She tries not to acknowledge that he’s stepped a little closer to her, her back only a few inches away from his chest. His breath is soft and warm against the side of her head, the height difference between them becoming more and more apparent to her. She flicks through the few photos she's taken of the roses, listening to him hum in approval to each one she shows him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She doesn’t remember how many she took before the viewfinder flashes the last picture she took from yesterday, suddenly gasping at the sight of her upper body clad only in a baby pink lace bralette and high waisted boyfriend jeans. She’s mentally cursing herself for forgetting to erase those from her memory card, quickly diverting the screen away from Ben’s eyes. It’s too late, he’s already clearing his throat nervously, looking up at the sky in an attempt to lessen the embarrassment on her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I, uh--that was nothing...for my blog…” she stammers, quickly shutting off her camera and twisting the strap to tuck it to her side. Her eyes meet his again and she swears they’ve gotten darker, quickly darting up and down before meeting hers again. </p>
<p>“It’s fine...uh, looks great actually. You’re a really good photographer.” he seems slightly less nervous than she is, but a little more of something else she can’t put her finger on. She decides not to think about it further.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thanks.” she shrugs. The air between them is thick as they momentarily stand in front of each other in silence. She should not feel embarrassed about this, she looks hot in that photo and he should be <em> lucky </em>because that’s the closest thing he’ll ever get to seeing her that way. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So...are you going to that party at Wexley’s house tonight?” he asks, breaking the silence.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh God no. Can’t imagine a worse way to spend my night than being cooped up with a bunch of baboon-minded drunks listening to ‘totally lit bangers’.” she retorts, putting air quotes around that last phrase, something she almost certainly thinks that her Dad would try to adopt into his vocabulary.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He scoffs in amusement. “Well, what if you were to go purely for the psychological research of understanding this primitive species in their natural habitat?” he jokes back, reflecting on their Psych 101 lecture from yesterday. She can’t help but laugh at that one.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“And would you be going?” she asks, crossing her arms over her chest. She’s not sure if he’s asking for them to go together, or if it was just a topic of conversation. A part of her might be a little disappointed if it were the latter.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, I mean every great scientific study needs a research assistant. I would be happy to fill that role for you.” A smirk cuts across his face and -<em> oh no- </em> why does he have dimples? She ponders his proposal for a moment, she feels like if she had to endure a night of groping and keg stands it should at least be in the company of someone with a similar sense of humor who she can make fun of people with. Right?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay fine, Solo. I’ll go to this party. But this is not a date, capiche?” she snaps, pointing a finger up at his face with a raised brow. He throws his hands up in innocence. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No date, got it.” he chuckles softly. “But, you should give me your number...so that way I can find you at the party…” he stammers, shuffling his fingers through his hair again while pulling out his phone.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She’s never been one to give her number to a guy so soon after meeting, well technically no guy has ever really asked her. She’s not exactly ‘approachable’ and ‘worth flirting with without getting a kick to your shin’, so this is all new territory. She takes his phone from his hand and quickly types in her number, adding her contact name before adding the purple smirking devil emoji next to it. She hands it back to him and he looks at the screen, chuckling to himself before sending her a text. Her phone pings a message from his number with the purple smirking devil, causing her to laugh back. Her eyes meet his once again, a soft smile radiating from his lips that she has <em> definitely </em>not thought about at all. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>She ruffles her short wavy hair in the mirror of the bathroom before taking another glance over herself. In order to make it look like she put minimal to no effort in her look for this incessant party she opted for a pair of high rise boyfriend jeans, a grey cropped band tee tied in a front knot and a pair of Doc Martens boots. She rarely puts on makeup, but she elects for a little blush and lip tint to make her look less dead than how she feels on the inside.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Giving the news to Kaydel that she would be able to go to Wexley’s party tonight was both annoying and a little rewarding. She thought Rey was playing a prank on her, but when she told her she was serious she practically shrieked of excitement and hugged her (only to very shortly after make her swear she would never tell anyone they hugged because of her reputation). Rey and Kaydel were going to go to and leave the party separately, as they do with anything to avoid people seeing them together. It was a little after 9pm as she came down the stairs and put her phone, keys and wallet into her large pockets. Dad is in the living room watching TV as she comes up from behind him and kisses the top of his head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Bye Dad, I’m going out.” Rey states absentmindedly, heading towards the door and leaving promptly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ha ha, very funny Rey.” Dr. Kenobi quips, not looking up from the TV. It’s only after he hears the front door slam does he look around to see that she wasn’t kidding. Kaydel shortly descends the staircase a few moments later, wearing a black spotted mini dress and strappy sandals. She quickly grabs her purse and attempts to make a similarly hasty exit before Dr. Kenobi stops her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Stop. Turn around. Explain.” he states flatly. She quickly turns with a nervous look.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You said that if Rey goes to the party I can too. It looks like your little Reyna has just left to go to said party, Dad.” she shrugs with a smile. Dr. Kenobi’s face drops in surprise and horror, unable to believe that this day has actually come. He groans, pinching the bridge of his nose.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No drinking, no drugs, no lewd behavior with any boys. I expect you both home before 1.” She squeals in excitement, running over to place a kiss to the top of her father’s head. Before he can say anything else, she yells out a thanks and slams the door behind her.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/UcXhwLL">
    
  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She can hear the blaring music and see the flashing lights a block away. She has rarely made an appearance to Fraternity Row, and the bile in her throat is already an indication why she doesn’t. The house she’s assuming is Wexley’s house is littered with people and red cups, groups of drunk college students laughing and playing beer pong as she walks up to the front door. She enters what looks like a typical house on Frat Row, most likely shared between 5-7 fraternity brothers and the constant hub of these parties. She doesn’t see Ben right away but doesn’t want to text him, for fear of looking desperate, so she begins to peruse the house. The hallways and kitchen are littered with drunken couples grinding or kissing, the occasional frat bro making his way around offering more drinks. As she turns the corner she is quickly face to face with the Devil of KVU, Poe Dameron. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Wow Kenobi! I thought hell would have frozen over before you ever came to one of these things.” he smirks, looking her up and down in a way that makes her want to ground to swallow her whole. “Is your sister here?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Stay away from my sister, you incel.” she snarls, pointing a finger in his smug face. He puts his hands up in innocence.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey okay, I’ll stay away from your sister,” he scoffs before leaning closer to her. “,but I can’t promise that she’ll stay away from me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She can practically feel her blood boil as he flashes her a wink and walks away. Her fists are balled up in anger at her sides, she suddenly feels reckless with rage that she doesn’t know what to do with. She can suddenly see Ben through the crowd in his white t-shirt and black jeans. <em> Fuck</em>, she can’t deny that he looks good. She’s allowed to feel some weird carnal attraction to him right? It’s just the psychology of the human mind and nothing more...right?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey.” he greets her as soon as he gets close enough. She doesn’t know what to do with herself so she quickly grabs a shot glass from a tray one of the frat boys is bringing around and throws the liquid to the back of her throat. It burns like a bitch and tastes what she assumes nail polish remover would taste like, her face twisting in a grimace. “Whoa whoa, what are you doing?” he asks, his voice vaguely laced with concern.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m getting fucked up! Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do at these things?” she snaps sarcastically, taking another shot glass from the tray before it’s out of arm's reach. Ben attempts to stop her but it’s too late, the putrid beverage burning a hole in the back of her throat. She suddenly feels warmer and more relaxed; she rarely ever drinks so she has no idea what to expect. She walks right past Ben into the kitchen, seeing more red cups filled with mysterious liquid on the counter. Rey doesn’t even ask him to follow her but he does anyway, always a few steps behind as she works her way around the island counter. There aren’t as many people in the kitchen so it’s a bit easier for him to try to talk.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Who was that guy?” he asks as she takes a sip from one of the cups. <em> Oh God</em>, why does alcohol have to taste like battery acid? She doesn’t want to talk about Poe Dameron, she can already vaguely see him from the other room with Kaydel, his hand intentionally gripped around her waist. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No one important.” she slurs slightly. If she wants to be able to be around Ben without being nervous or see Poe without wanting to ram her first through his jaw, she’s going to need a lot more of these cups. She tilts her chin back to drink the rest of the foul liquid, and she feels like she’s floating on a cloud. A song that Rey doesn’t recognize starts blaring across the speakers and cheers erupt from the crowd of college students. She gasps as if she knows it, and the beat of the bass for some reason makes her want to dance.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Dance with me, Ben.” she mumbles, taking his obnoxiously large hand and spinning herself around to put her back against his chest. She rhythmically starts to sway against him, the feeling of his crotch brushing against her ass and lower back. He grips her hip with one hand and splays the other flat across her stomach. Rey doesn’t even dare think about the future implications of grinding on Ben Solo, only that it feels really good and she wants to keep doing it. His large fingers flutter across the exposed skin in between her jeans and crop top, leaving a trail of electricity on her already hot skin. She has no idea how much time passes with them against each other, staying at the same sensual fluid pace as if they have all the time in the world. He bends forward slightly so his lips meet the shell of her ear.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Fuck, Rey. You’re so beautiful.” he mutters in a deep voice. Her body completely reverberates against the sound. She can’t remember if anyone’s ever called her that before...<em> hot </em> maybe, but never <em> beautiful </em>. Rey pushes out the rational side of her mind that’s been trying to get her to stop as she momentarily grinds a little harder against Ben’s crotch. She can hear him groan against her ear as she smirks to herself, she’s never felt this (dare she say) sexy, the way she can make him come undone with little effort. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They’re almost instantly taken out of their reviere as a loud clamoring noise comes from the living room, followed by a series of shouts and punching sounds. They snap out of whatever the hell just happened between them and rush over to go see what all the commotion is about. It’s only after they walk down the hall and amongst the crowd of onlookers that she realizes that he’s holding her hand. She smirks to herself before looking at what seems like a typical fight between two guys over something probably really stupid.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“And here we have the native species engaging in a battle for dominance.” He bends over to whisper in her ear in his best nature documentary narrator voice. She can’t help but snort in laughter, playfully slapping him in the arm. Once she realizes that it’s just another pissing contest for power, she tugs on Ben’s hand and leads him to the backyard. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The backyard is huge and mostly empty thanks to the ruckus inside the house. There’s a stone bench at the edge of the garden that seems separated enough from other people that they choose to sit at. Her recklessness is starting to catch up to her, the combination of drinks and her movements with Ben having her slightly weak in the knees. If he thinks she’s a messy drunk he doesn’t say it, just carefully guides her to sit at the bench. She leans forward and looks out in front of her with her palms against the edge of the bench. A period of silence passes between them before she slowly starts to lean a little too forward, Ben quickly scooping her up and leaning her against his shoulder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why are you helping me?” she scorns lazily. “Also why aren’t you drunk? I’m sure you had just as much as me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He chuckles at that. “Well, you have a very small body so your alcohol tolerance is a lot lower than mine, making you drunk faster. My body practically absorbs it fast enough that I never get drunk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Wow, you have a good body…” she mumbles, only realizing what she just said a few seconds later. She chokes a little as he chuckles quietly at her slip up. “Fuck! Uh, that’s not what I meant...I mean you do, but...fuck. I meant like with the whole alcohol thing…” she stammers in an attempt to backpedal. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He places his palm against her cheek and turns her to face him. She looks up almost longingly at him, truly being able to appreciate his facial features in the glowing moonlight. “It’s okay. For what it’s worth, you have a good body too.” He flashes her a dimpled smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Was that meant to be an accidental innuendo like mine?” God, why does she sound so <em> stupid </em> right now? Alcohol really does kill brain cells.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Nope, but I’m hoping that you’re drunk enough that you won’t remember I said it.” He chuckles softly, rubbing the pad of his thumb against her cheek. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>This feeling...she doesn’t know what it is. Her body feels good around him, that much she can say. He’s kind and gentle but can also be rough and irritating. Does she even want to find out what all that means? Maybe not in her currently inebriated state, but for now whatever it is it’s pleasant.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben offers to drive her home, even if it means leaving her car on Frat Row until she can come and get it tomorrow. She thankfully only lives a mile away, so she makes a mental note (if she can even remember it by tomorrow) to walk over and get it tomorrow before class. It’s currently 12:39am, so she makes sure to text Kaydel and remind her of their 1am curfew. Ben carefully helps her into the passenger seat of his Jeep and drives off. Their car ride together is quick and relatively silent, only the soft sound of some 90’s R&amp;B song playing on the radio. Once his car pulls up in front of Rey’s house he turns off the engine and releases his hands from the steering wheel.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s the deal with your dad? Is he a pain in the ass?” he asks, flipping the engine off. He must have seen her reverently texting Kaydel about the curfew. She chuckles at his question, she’d never say it herself but it must be obvious that there’s more to it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, just a lot of rules. He also wants me to be someone that I’m not...a.k.a perfect little Kaydel.” she counters, rolling her eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, I know that everyone ‘digs’ your sister...but I think she’s without.” he glances over to her with a look of...fondness? She smirks as she looks down in her lap, unsure of how to accept his compliment. “You know you don’t seem like the type to adhere to your father’s curfew.” he continues to say. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, so now you think you know me?” she raises an eyebrow at him with a smirk.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I think I’m starting to.” he smiles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The only thing people know about me is that I’m unapproachable and scary. If they even know who I am at all.” she scoffs, looking out to the window facing her house. He looks at her quizzically.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, well I’m no picnic myself.” he shrugs. She looks over to him at almost the exact moment that he looks over to her. Their intense eye contact sends a shiver down her spine. “I’m glad you came tonight.” He says softly, turning his torso over to look at her better. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Me too.” she whispers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The scariest part about all this is that it isn’t the alcohol that’s inducing her feelings, they are annoyingly still present even after its effects have mostly worn off. She remembers the pulse of electricity from his fingertips as he touched her skin and held her hand, the roughness of his voice against her ear, the dimpled smile that makes her heart momentarily flutter. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She can see him lean forward over the center console slightly, his eyes darting to her lips. Is he going to kiss her? Oh God, oh God...she hasn’t been kissed in an embarrassingly long time, what if she fucks it up? What if she doesn’t and it's amazing? Shit shit shit…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey slowly leans forward too, her eyes staring at the plush skin of his lips. Damn, have they always looked like that? She closes her eyes as she can feel his warm breath against her face…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Maybe we should do this another time.” he mutters, turning himself back around to face the steering wheel. Her eyes open to look at him in bafflement. He doesn’t meet her eyes again, so she scoffs to herself, quickly unbuckling her seatbelt and storming out of the car before slamming the door. She holds herself as she walks up to the front gate, turning around briefly to see that he’s already starting to drive away. She uses every fiber of her being to conceal not just the rage in her heart, but the tears in her eyes.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi ok so the fun moodboards i've been trying to post with each chapter haven't been working so if anyone is an ao3 wizard that can help me figure this out please tweet me (@blessedreylo) and I will love you forever. i've also been posting them on twitter every time I upload a new chapter so you can check it out on there too.</p>
<p>i really love this chapter so please enjoyyyyyy</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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  <a href="https://imgur.com/VWmkNwY">  </a>
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<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Never. Drinking. Again.  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey groans as her alarm blares next to her ears, practically slapping it off the table in an attempt to shut it off. What juvenile dimwit thought it was a good idea to have a party on a Tuesday night during the first week of the semester? Rey has to silently thank her past self for not being too inebriated to remember to chug half a gallon of water and some ibuprofen before bed, her hangover symptoms are now only mildly irritating. She tries not to think about what transpired between her and Ben last night, not just the fact that he didn’t kiss her but the way their bodies moved in tandem, the witty banter between them, the way he looked at her like she was --</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her alarm starts blaring again from the floor of her room, clearly attempting to ruin her day before 8am. Groaning again, she finally gets out of bed before shutting that infernal contraption off. She quickly hops in the shower to scrub herself both physically and mentally of last night's events before throwing on a pair of high waisted jeans, a maroon sweater and white sneakers. She leaves her hair to air dry and slaps on some tinted moisturizer in an attempt to rid her skin of the dullness. <em> Note to self: alcohol fucks up your skin.  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“You did what now?” Rose exclaims in her futile attempt of a whisper. They’re sitting in the back of Feminist Theory as Rey attempts to recollect the events of last night.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s not a big deal. It was a lapse in judgement and it will never happen again.” She huffs. Her phone vibrates and she tries to ignore what will now be Ben’s fifth time texting her since last night: first it was asking if she was okay, then a couple of times asking if he can explain himself and then the most recent trying to apologize. She scoffs before locking her phone and putting it face down on her desk, trying not to think about him. Of course it will only be a few hours before she sees him in Psych but she refuses to even give him the time of day.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, if this guy makes you happy...maybe he’s worth a chance?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s the problem, he <em> did </em>make me happy in my moment of intoxication. But once that passed he went back to being a total ass. He’s just another testosterone-filled, simple-minded, asshole of a man.” she crosses her arms over her chest and slumps further into her chair, attempting to capture some knowledge from Professor Holdo’s lecture. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Damn, you’ve really got it bad…” Rose mumbles to herself.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Nothing.”</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>The lecture hall is already half full by the time Rey walks through the door with only 10 minutes before class starts. She scans the hall for a familiar head of hair and sighs in relief when she doesn’t see it. <em> Maybe he dropped the class so he can stay far away for me...since he thinks the idea of being around me is so repulsive-- </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>She takes her aisle seat in the fourth row and starts taking her notebook out of her backpack. Indistinct chatter fills the lecture hall as she opens up to a new page and begins writing the date and lecture topic.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey,” a familiar low voice speaks in the aisle next to her. She snaps her head to see him, eyes wide and intently staring at her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hello Ben.” she says flatly, turning her head back to face the front of the lecture hall. Maybe if she ignores him he’ll go away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can I...sit next to you?” he stammers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No. I’m sure the girl with the pink hair and Slipknot t-shirt will not appreciate her unassigned-assigned seat being taken.” She manages to think of some generic person she remembers sitting next to her on the first day in a vain excuse to not have him sit there. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey...If I could just--” he begins before being interrupted by Professor Ackbar trying to settle the noise down. She turns back to glare at him and she almost sees a part of him shrivel up in that moment. He sighs and takes the aisle seat opposite and one row behind from her. Professor Ackbar almost instantly begins droning about the five major concepts of psychology before she feels her phone vibrating. She holds it up to see a text from Ben:</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: We need to talk.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She quietly huffs in annoyance, this man is relentless. She faces her phone down on her desk trying to ignore him before it vibrates again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: You know I can see you ignoring me right?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: I’m trying to learn.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Ahhh, she speaks…</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>I need to talk to you about last night.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: You said everything you needed to say. Message received. </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Rey, it’s not like that. God, you are so stubborn.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: Oh, I’m stubborn? That’s rich coming from you.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><b>Ben: I’m not trying to fight. I want to make it up to you. </b> <b>Meet me in front of the oak tree after class. </b></p>
<p> </p>
<p>She looks down at the message slightly puzzled. What exactly does he mean by ‘making it up to her’?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Please?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: Ok fine, Solo. After class. </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She locks her phone and sets it back on the desk in finality, hoping he can get the message that the conversation is over for now. She can feel him staring at the back of her head, her mind swirling with all the things he could possibly mean.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey takes her time collecting her things after class, almost subconsciously giving Ben a head start to the oak tree. She wants to make sure he actually keeps true to his word. She slings her bag over her shoulder and begins walking towards the tree where she first saw him only two days ago. And there he is, leaning against the trunk with his arms crossed over his chest smirking at her. He’s wearing a black long sleeved shirt, black jeans and white sneakers; Rey tries to push out the thoughts of running her fingers through his soft looking waves before reaching up to him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi,” he smiles, quickly glancing up and down as she walks closer to him. Why is he looking at her like that? Her thrift store ensemble can’t be that much to stare at.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi...so what is this all about?” she wastes no time in trying to get to the crux of why he summoned her here. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’ll see. Do you have your camera with you?” he asks, raising an eyebrow at her backpack. Rey almost never goes anywhere without her camera for fear of missing a great shot, so even on the days she doesn’t have AP she always keeps it close. She nods her head quizzically. “Good. Let’s go.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Go? Where are we going?” she challenges. She did not agree to going anywhere with him besides the oak tree.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’ll see. God Rey, you ask so many questions.” he scoffs sarcastically, ushering her towards the parking lot. She tries not to notice his large hand on the small of her back guiding her across the courtyard.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I wouldn’t ask so many questions if you just answered them once in a while.” she retorts with a laugh, earning a deep chuckle from Ben.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They walk up to his black Jeep and he quietly opens the door for her, his hand lingering on her back for as long as possible. He walks around to the drivers side and hops in before starting the engine.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Did you ever get your car back from Frat Row?” he asks, pulling out of the parking lot into the open street.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I made Kay do it, told her she owed me for letting her go to the party. But that if there was even a scratch on BB I would tell Dad about when she snuck out of the window to go to a late night beach party over the summer.” she chuckles to herself, earning a chuckle back from Ben.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, so you guys don’t <em> totally </em> hate each other.” he jokes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No...we are just fundamentally very different people. But I know what it’s like to be her age and want to do all those things, so I indulge her from time to time.” she shrugs, looking out the tinted window to try to discern where they’re going. They’ve definitely left the city of Corellia, heading towards back roads she hasn’t taken before. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Is that what you were like at her age? The parties and the boys and stuff?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That, Mr. Solo…” she leans over the center console just slightly, his eyes not leaving the road but desperately wanting to. “Is for me to know and for you to never find out.” she smirks coyly. He glances at her for a moment, his dimpled smile and chuckle sending some strange sensation of warmth in her. The car starts to slow down as it hits a gravel pathway surrounded by bushes and trees, parking it on the side and shutting off the engine. “Where are we?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Again with all the questions!” he mocks, unbuckling his seat belt. “Just get out of the car and bring your camera.” His commanding voice does something to her, adding it to her mental list of Things That Ben Solo Does That She Doesn’t Quite Understand Yet. Grabbing her camera out of her backpack and looping the strap around her neck, he opens the passenger door for her and guides her out. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They walk along this pathway until he pushes past and leads her through a thicket of bushes to reveal a vista point; lined with a short stone wall and elevated on a hillside it completely overlooks the entire city of Corellia. She gasps at the sight, reveling in all the different aspects of the city she never noticed before: all the trees and landscape engulfing the concrete structures of the city in the middle. Off to the side she can see the carefully outlined suburbs and far beyond it all she can see the silver blue expanse of the ocean. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Whoa…” she whispers, her eyes darting around trying to see everything at once. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I come up here a lot when I want to be alone. Clear my head, ya know? I figured it would be a cool place for you to get some shots.” he’s also looking up over the viewpoint before his gaze turns to her with a smile. She looks up at him with a shy grin, taking the camera in between her hands and setting it up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He quietly observes her as she clicks away from various angles. His hands rest flat on the short stone wall edging the hillside, and he quickly notices her camera flicking in that direction and snapping a shot. He looks up at her curiously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I, uh...you have nice hands. From an artistic perspective.” she hesitates for a moment before turning the viewfinder over to show him. He hums in satisfaction, raising his eyebrows in approval.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My turn.” he states, carefully taking the strap off from her neck and putting the camera in between his large hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh? And what do you even know about photography?” she chides, crossing her arms over her chest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well one thing I know for certain…” he says as he lines up the lens in front of him and puts the camera to his face, quickly snapping a photo. “...is that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.” He looks down at the viewfinder and smiles before turning it to face her. Ben took a picture of <em> her. </em>She stares down at the small screen in bewilderment, how soft and young she looks in the photo. A small but noticeable smile across her lips as she looks up the person behind the lens. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hmm…” she smirks at the photo before he turns it back to himself to look at again with a grin. “Well that may be true but I definitely prefer to find the beauty from behind the lens, not in front of it.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, what if the beauty <em> is </em> behind the lens?” His voice is softer as he steps closer to her, tucking the camera onto his side from the strap around his neck. There's a moment of pause between them, Rey clearly seeing Ben trying to formulate words in his head. “Do you know how badly I wanted to kiss you last night? I didn’t want you to think I was taking advantage of you...being drunk. But I just…” There’s merely inches between them, those inches growing smaller and smaller as he leans closer. She can’t help but look up at him longingly, washed in warmth from his words. How does this man manage to irritate her and appease her at the same time? One of his hands reaches up to cup her jawline, the pad of his thumb brushing across her cheek similarly to when they sat on the stone bench last night. All it would take...would be one...more….</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He softly presses his lips against hers, a surge of electricity pulsing between them. She mentally rejoices in the fact that his lips are softer than she imagined, pliant and plush against her. It’s a tame kiss, almost as if he’s unsure to go further. She takes the guesswork out for him and begins to move her lips, returning the kiss intently. This seems to be the green light he needs, gripping her waist with his other arm in an attempt to bring their bodies closer. A sudden gust of chilling September wind whips past them, causing her to shudder and break apart the kiss. She leans her head against his chest and shivers as his arms instinctively reach up to wrap around his shoulders.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let’s sit in the car.” he says, his voice low and somewhat caring. Without letting go, he guides her to the car but brings her towards the drivers side instead of the passengers. She looks up at him quizzically as he sits in the driver's seat and begins pushing the seat back. “Oh, I’m not done with you yet, sweetheart.” he smirks, taking the camera off his neck before reaching his hand to hoist her into the car. She giggles astoundingly as she realizes she's straddling his lap, his arm shutting the door and crashing his lips back against hers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The kiss quickly reaches new heights as his hands roam up and down her body, her tongue darting into his parted lips to deepen the intensity. She is mildly impressed with herself; for being out of the game for as long as she has, she’s managed to elicit groans of pleasure from him she’s never been able to before. She grinds down on his lap as she runs her fingers through his hair, absolutely indulging herself in as many sensations as she can get from him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You little minx…” he murmurs against her lips. His lips suddenly leave hers as they continue work down the column of her throat. He stakes a claim at the juncture between her jawline, ear and throat and works endlessly to kiss, bite, and lick the spot until she’s sure there will be a bruise. A soft knock hits against the window but they are too enamored to even notice, suspecting a branch hitting the car. A moment later the knock comes back more urgently and they quickly whip around to see another face meet theirs. Panic courses through both of them as they realize it's a police officer gesturing them to lower their window. Ben mumbles a hasty string of expletives as he quickly presses the button to lower the tinted window on his left side. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hello there.” the officer states blankly. “You’re trespassing private property, did you know that?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m so sorry, sir. We can leave…” Ben states nervously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You guys got some ID?” he asks, gesturing to both of them. They mutter in the affirmative and begin floundering around each other in an attempt to reach the wallets out of their respective pockets. Ben grips her waist and gently but quickly carries her over the center console to bring her to the passenger seat. She mentally agrees that it’s probably a little inappropriate for her to continue to straddle him in the presence of a police officer. They hand their cards to the officer, Officer Windu according to his badge, as he stares over them, glancing between them and their cards dubiously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Kenobi, huh? Any relation to Dr. Kenobi down at the Corellia General?” he asks, still looking over their cards.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My dad, sir.” she answers. Ben looks over to her with a slight twinge of surprise, Rey just now realizing that Ben didn’t even know her last name until now. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He’s a hell of a surgeon. Saved a really bad car accident patient I brought in a few nights ago.” he continues, handing them back their cards. “You’re free to go, just stay out of trouble.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you, sir. Will do.” Ben breathes a sigh of relief, taking both their ID cards and placing them in the cup holder. “Have a great rest of your day.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Say hi to your father for me.” Officer Windu nods with a slightly devious smile. Rey chokes on a stifled laugh, there’s absolutely <em> no way </em>she’s about to tell her dad that she got caught by the police making out with a guy in a no trespassing zone. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They pull out of the gravel driveway, passing Officer Windu’s patrol car before jetting back onto the main road. A few moments of silence pass before Rey lets out the laugh she’s been suppressing. It's hearty and deep and she can't stop even if she wanted to, practically doubled over in her seat. Ben glances over to her before letting out a deep chuckle of his own and shaking his head.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>fun fact: the vista point is inspired by the view of San Francisco from Twin Peaks. if you've never been I highly recommend it :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi so I FINALLY figured out how to actually upload photos to AO3 (can I get a hell yeah???)</p>
<p>now every chapter of this story has an accompanying moodboard so if you haven't checked them out go back to the previous chapters to see them! they're just as fun to make as writing the story because it helps me visualize everything a bit better. I hope you all enjoy them! feel free to follow me on twitter @blessedreylo for more!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/DQzdkPW">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The tingling feeling hasn’t left her lips since she said goodbye to Ben. After their run-in with the law, he swiftly dropped her back off to her car on campus. Before she could say goodbye he placed his hand on the back of her head, bringing her lips to his once more. She couldn’t help but smile into the kiss as goosebumps covered her skin from head to toe, relishing in the feeling. It’s a couple hours later now and she’s back home looking over photos. With the memory card in her laptop she swipes through all the pictures she’s taken in the last few weeks, setting the good ones aside in a separate folder to either add to her portfolio or put on her blog. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Running a small anonymous photography blog is something she decided to pick up last semester when she realized that no one was getting to see the work she was so proud of. The reason she made it anonymous is because she knows how cruel people can be, and she just can’t subject her heart to that kind of ridicule. People can make fun of <em> her </em> all they’d like, but her work and her passion are far too sacred to touch. She scrolls through her most recent posts and comes across the bralette photo that she accidentally showed Ben; it had pretty good engagement so far, and purposely omitting her face made her feel like some sexy mystery girl that the comments were fawning over. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Almost as if her thoughts conjured his spirit, her phone vibrates with a text from him. She shouldn’t be getting this giddy feeling, she’s barely known him a week and she can already feel the harsh exterior walls she’s built around herself waver. She can’t let that happen, no matter how much she likes kissing him or how his hands feel on her body.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Kenobi? </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: Solo?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><b>Ben: Oh good, you haven’t become a fugitive of the law yet. </b> <em> . </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: The night is young. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Plus I watch enough murder mysteries I’d know how to frame you instead</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Lol, I’ll keep that in mind.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>What are you up to?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: Looking through some photos…</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: You mentioned you have a blog </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Can I see it?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: Huh? When did I say that?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: When you showed me that gorgeous picture of you in the bralette.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>I haven’t forgotten ;)</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She curses herself for revealing such a detail in her skittish haste. It’s not like she has anything more incriminating than that photo, maybe some equally so, but nothing too inappropriate. She’s had the man's tongue down her throat, what more harm could it do to have him look at her blog?</p>
<p> </p>
<p><b>Rey: Ugh...fine. But any funny business and I </b> <b> <em>will</em> </b> <b> frame you for murder.</b></p>
<p>
  <b>www.delicatecomposition.com</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey nervously slides her phone across the desk, as if the link she sent set off a ticking time bomb. Is she concerned about what he’ll think? She’s never cared what anyone thinks about her work besides professors and people offering her jobs, but this is different. She fidgets nervously at the thought of him scrolling through it at this very moment, seeing a new vulnerable side of her. A side that is the complete opposite of the harsh crude facade she puts on for the rest of the world. The vibration of her phone takes her out of her reverie, but this time it's a call: <em> Ben </em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben?” she answers the phone after hesitating for a few moments.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey…” he breathes, his deep voice resonating down her spine. “These photos...are amazing. Like seriously...wow.” She can’t help but blush at his words, not in the giddy flirtatious ‘a boy is telling me nice things’ kind of way, but that there’s someone else out there with no stake in the game who actually appreciates her work.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you just talking about the ones in my various states of undress?” she quips, trying to lighten the mood before her feelings cause her to internally combust. She can’t get too flirty with him, she has to keep up the somewhat harsh exterior for now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He chuckles out loud. “Well, I won’t deny that I looked at those with a much more <em> meticulous </em> eye…” She rolls her eyes as she giggles. “But I’m serious, I mean all of them. You’re super fucking talented.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you.” she smiles to herself. There’s a comfortable pause, what else is she supposed to say? Is he expecting her to say something else? She considers herself pretty smart, but when it comes to men she might as well try to understand biochemical engineering.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I, uh...can’t stop thinking about us. In my car.” he mutters, a slight edge of nervousness laced in his voice. Oh God, she can’t go down this path right now; of course she hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it either but she can’t give him the upperhand in knowing that she felt it too.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hmm you’re right...Officer Windu seemed like a really nice guy for letting us go.” she tries to keep her voice as serious as possible but the sputter of laughter that she hears from the other end causes her to laugh just as hard.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re such a brat, Kenobi.” he chides. “What time do you get out of class tomorrow?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What’s it to you?” she quips, playing hard to get. She can already guess that he’s going to ask her to hang out tomorrow and some insane part of her is dying to, but she has to reign it in. No guy, no matter how soft his lips or how broad his shoulders are, is worth losing herself over.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, if you must know....I was hoping to pick where we left off. Before the <em> very nice </em> Officer Windu came to visit.” They share another laugh and she can already feel a pool of warmth low in her stomach.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hmm...I guess I can pencil you in my schedule. I finish up at 12. Crevasse Hall.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Perfect. I’ll meet you there.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Goodnight, Ben.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Goodnight, Rey.”</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“Kay, I swear you’ve gone off the deep end this time.” Rey states, her palms flat over the kitchen island. They’re cleaning up after dinner but her younger sister springing this crazy proposal on her has put a wrench in those plans. Kaydel stands on the opposite side of her with the biggest pleading eyes she’s ever seen, pretending to wipe down the counter like Dad had asked her to.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh c’mon, Rey. I know this isn’t the craziest thing to ask of you, I saw you with that tall mystery guy at Wexley’s party.” Kaydel crosses her arms over her chest, raising an eyebrow. Rey quickly shushes her, making sure that Dad can’t hear their conversation from the living room. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let me get this straight: you want me to hang out with ‘that guy’ on Friday night just so you can go to some crazy rave concert thing downtown with Poe and his posse of prep zombies?” Rey says as she walks around the island counter before standing right next to her sister. She has to give Kaydel props for finding a very convenient loophole in Dad’s rule; if Rey is out on a Friday night then Dad has no choice but to let Kaydel go out too. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Exactly! See I knew you had <em> something </em>up in that noggin of yours!” she jests sarcastically. Rey pinches the bridge of her nose (a habit she definitely inherited from her father) in frustration. Of course it wouldn’t be that hard for her to ask Ben if he wants to hang out, but what would they do? Would he think it’s a date? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Helloooo, earth to Rey?” Kaydel waves her hands over Rey’s face, taking her out of her reverie. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Uh...okay fine. Fine, I'll do it.” She quickly puts her hand over her sister's mouth to suppress her squeals. “But you must promise me that you will be safe. Okay? No funny business. Lord knows what you even see in that empty-headed Ken doll.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay, okay I get it! I owe you one, if you need an outfit for your date with Tall Brooding Hot Guy, I’ll let you borrow one of my dresses.” she smirks, nudging her older sister in the arm. Rey lightly slaps her nudge away, trying her best to keep a serious face in between her giggles. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben was definitely a man of his word, waiting right outside Crevasse Hall after her Advanced Photography class at 12pm on the dot. She can’t help but appreciate his dark denim jacket, black shirt and black jeans; how the hell does he manage to get his hair so perfect? She’s wearing a white cropped tee, gray mom jeans and a large faded red flannel she found in the mens section of the thrift store, her camera dangling from her neck and her bag slung over one shoulder. He’s leaning against a stone pillar with a smirk and roaming eyes as she walks up to him, her own smile creeping up on her lips. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey there, criminal.” he smirks with a mischievous glint in his eye. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hello there, accomplice.” she nudges him, continuing to walk and gesturing to him to catch up to her. She doesn’t want to stop walking for fear that he might try to hug or kiss her in front of everyone, not that she thinks he would but with the way he looks she might be doing it more for her own sake. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few minutes of walking and polite conversation they end up behind a secluded brick wall on the southside of campus, Rey’s back pushed up against the wall as Ben ravishes her lips. She wanted to make sure they went somewhere they couldn’t be easily seen, not ready for her to be the subject of random onlookers. She doesn’t like unwanted attention, but the way Ben’s large hands are wandering across her body is the kind of attention she’ll allow. He kisses her hungrily, eliciting moans from the back of her throat as she runs her fingers through his soft hair. The space between their bodies is nonexistent, his large frame encasing her against the hard brick. She was going to ask him about Friday night before any of <em> this </em>started, but he was so eager to kiss her it completely slipped her mind.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Do you --- have plans on -- Friday night?” she pants against his lips, a few light moans sprinkled in between words.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Eager are we, Kenobi?” he mutters back with a smirk.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Asshole.” she lightly pushes his lips off hers, but he wastes no time reattaching them to her throat. She takes a few moments to gasp for breath, trying to ignore how electric he feels against her neck as she tries to formulate her request. “I, uh...Kaydel wants to go to some concert thing so I need to have plans so Dad will let her go.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He pauses for a moment, his face still buried in the crook of her neck. “Is that how it works? Your sister can do things if you do?” She can’t tell if he seems perplexed or annoyed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Another facet of Dad’s medieval rules.” she shrugs. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So you only want to hang out with me as a favor to your sister?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, when you put it <em> that </em> way it sounds…” She’s cut off by her own gasp at the sensation of him nipping against her neck. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I would be honored.” He smiles into her skin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She sighs in...relief? Is it relief that this plan will work or relief that he actually wants to hang out with her? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My housemates are having a little kick back on Friday night.” He comes up to meet her eyes, looking at her with some level of fondness. She huffs at the idea of another party, earning a chuckle from him. “Don’t worry, nothing like Wexley’s party. Just a couple of people hanging out, listening to music, maybe some booze and weed.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She contemplates the idea for a moment. She’s never been to a kick back, the idea only vaguely familiar to her from shows and movies. Plus it means she would be in his <em> house </em> , possibly in his <em> room </em>. Her mind swirls with all the ways that could end up, almost all of them invoking a tingling feeling in her stomach. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay, fine.” she nods matter of factly. “Thank you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Anything to help the Kenobi sisters’ rebellion against The Man.” he chuckles. She rolls her eyes, cupping his face with her small hands and guiding it back down to her lips.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! May the 4th be with you all! </p><p>I hope this chapter is a nice gift on this holiday. let me know what you think!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/WyzeC3m">
    
  </a>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rose mumbles to herself as she scavenges through Rey’s closet with ferocity, determined to find her a ‘suitable’ outfit for tonight's kick back. Rose is dressed in a pair of ripped dark jeans and a tight black tank top, her hair loosely curled into waves. Rey is laying flat on her bed like a starfish while her mind races with all the possible scenarios that could happen tonight. She’s already taken the liberty of curling her own hair and applied a little bronzer, mascara and dark pink lip tint at the advice of Rose. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Seriously Rey, we’ve got to get you some sexier pieces if this guy plans on sticking around.” Rose huffs, pulling out a black denim skirt and a white cropped t-shirt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So now you’re telling me I need to appease a man with my looks? Professor Holdo would be disappointed, Rose.” she chides sarcastically, taking the clothes out of her hands. She’s grateful that Rose agreed to tag along tonight, hopefully a familiar face will help her nerves. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There’s nothing un-feminist about wanting to use your sex appeal as a power move.” she laughs, throwing her hands up in innocence. Rose is clearly way too comfortable at her house, rummaging through her underwear drawer to pull out a black bra and matching pair of cotton panties before tossing them at Rey’s face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A black bra under a white shirt? Won’t you be able to see it?” Rey asks in a mocking tone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Exactly.” Rose smirks.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<ul>

</ul><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rey finishes the ties on her white Vans as the doorbell rings, the glass on the front door reflecting the vile department store mannequin brought to life Poe Dameron. She groans as Kaydel gleefully skips to the door to open it, their indistinct chatter filling the front room. Dad comes out of the living room to stoically greet him, the tight grip in his handshake causing Poe to momentarily wince. Rey and Rose come into the room once Dad has given Kaydel the same warning rundown he gives every time they leave the front door before swiftly turning back into the living room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let me go grab my bag.” Kaydel says sweetly at him before leaving the room. Rey and Rose both cross their arms and sneer at the man quietly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Looking good, Kenobi. The Make A Wish Foundation finally donated you a decent wardrobe?” he jeers with a smirk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Eat shit, Dameron. Oh wait, I think I see a little of it left in your teeth.” she mocks charmingly, earning a laugh from Rose. His eyes widen as his hand quickly shoots up to his teeth to check. Rey laughs menacingly as Kaydel finally re-enters the room, throwing Rey an annoyed side eye before grabbing Poe’s hand and dragging him out of the house. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bye Dad, we’re leaving! No need to hit us with the rundown, we already caught the first showing.” Rey says loudly from the front door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bye Dr. Kenobi!” Rose says with a smile and wave before Rey grabs her arm and shuts the door. </span>
</p><p> </p>
<ul>

</ul><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ben’s townhouse is bigger than she expected, although she’s not really sure she had an expectation to begin with. She knocks on the unit number Ben texted her and almost instantly the door swings open to reveal a tall redhead in a navy blue shirt and jeans.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, you must be Rey! And Rey’s friend, Rose! C’mon in…” he ushers them into the living room, already littered with a few people. “I’m Armie Hux, but you can just call me Hux. I’m Ben’s roommate.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nice to meet you. Wait, I think we had organic chem last year together!” Rose blurts out, her eyes looking up at him with an enthusiastic smile. Rey recognizes that dopey smile, she had the same face junior year when she flirted with the campus coffee shop barista, successfully resulting in him putting his phone number on her cup.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh yeah, we did! It’s good to see you…again” Hux smiles nervously. “Ben should be around here somewhere helping Finn. Finn’s our other roommate. Make yourselves at home.” Rey can tell that she’s become invisible in this conversation between two smitten looking people, so she swiftly makes her exit and heads towards the kitchen. The living room is spacious, a large sectional couch lining the walls covered with people talking and drinking. There’s moderately loud music playing, a genre or artist she doesn’t recognize. She turns the corner to head towards what she presumes to be the kitchen when she runs into a very large and hard body. She stumbles slightly as the body grasps her by the arms to stabilize her, she can already feel the familiar warmth radiating through a familiar pair of large hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Rey…” A surprised smile splashes across his face as Ben looks down at her. Although she’s seen the fitted black t-shirt and jeans look on him a handful of times, it never fails to take her breath away. She can see his biceps flexed as he grips her arms and just the thought of them makes her momentarily dizzy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi Ben….uh, nice place.” she stammers, tensing slightly at the fact her arms are still under his grip. He must realize it because she can quickly feel him relax and put his arms down at his sides. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks. I’m glad you made it.” His eyes behold her up and down before quickly diverting to her lips. She’s scared to kiss him right now, afraid of what she’ll do if he does. It’s too intimate, too personal to be in his house; she has to find a way to keep a safe distance before something happens. He must sense her nerves, he clears his throat and tries to waft the tension between them. “Do you want something to drink?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sure.” she states, letting out a shaky breath she didn’t know she was holding. He places his hand on the small of her back and leads her to the kitchen, moving through the narrow hallway causing their bodies to brush against each other. He leads her into a well lit kitchen with drinks and snacks covering the counter, a tall dark haired guy passing some cups to a pair of girls.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ben! Oh hey, you must be Rey!” he exclaims. How the hell do his roommates already know about her? “I’m Finn.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nice to meet you, Finn.” she musters a smile, something that she’s having to learn how to do more often lately. She typically keeps her guard up around strangers, but she doesn’t want to come across as a bitch to Ben’s roommates. Finn hands her a cup a quarter full of brown liquid and before she can even think of what kind of vile substance is inside it, she tilts her head back to gulp it down. Lord knows she’ll need all the liquid courage she can get to survive the night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The night passes without much issue; Rey and Ben sit with the others in the living room talking and drinking as the music continues to play. Rey introduces Ben to Rose and she immediately takes a liking to him, making several quiet remarks to Rey about how hot he is and how she needs to, in her words, ‘climb him like a tree’. Rose seems to have her own tree to climb, practically intertwined with Hux (maybe he’ll finally get her to forget about Weird Secret Online Admirer Guy) the entire night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rey tries to ignore the fact that Ben has had his hand on her exposed knee for an uncertain amount of time, but she can’t tell him to stop because it feels too nice and too warm. Occasionally he’ll whisper something sweet or funny in her ear, the warmth of his breath sending goosebumps down her body. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You have something like that in your room, don’t you Ben?” Hux asks, taking them both out of whatever trance they momentarily put each other under. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Huh? Oh yeah, I do.” Ben blinks rapidly, apparently listening to the conversation more than Rey has.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s so cool! You should show Rey, she loves stuff like that.” Rose slurs happily, taking another sip of whatever is in her cup. Rey can tell what she’s doing and she’s not sure if she should thank her or throw a pillow at her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh yeah...sure. Do you want to…?” Ben begins asking, before gesturing to the hallway. She has no idea what the hell they’re all talking about but she nods anyway, letting whatever part of her that’s been trying to keep her from being alone with him take a back seat. They both stand up, he takes her hand gently and walks her down the dark hallway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His room is dark minus a small lamp on his bedside table. It looks like a typical male college dorm room: slightly rumpled bed in the corner, a desk littered with textbooks, plants lining the window sill and some photographs and posters covering the walls. She doesn’t really know what she was expecting, maybe that it's a little bit bigger but that's probably because he has the master bedroom. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry I didn’t really have time to tidy it. Had to help set the place up after class today.” He mutters, running his fingers through his hair nervously.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine…” she says absentmindedly, tracing her fingers over the photos on the walls. She turns back to look at him, he’s already closed the door and is staring at her ardently. Rey feels both self-conscious and completely comfortable under his gaze, her heartbeat thumping against her chest. She’s completely still as he begins walking over to her, quickly closing the gap between them with his hands on her hips.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry...I haven’t been able to stop looking at you tonight.” Her breath hitches in her throat at his admission. “I don’t want you to think I’m objectifying you or anything, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>...you look so good. This skirt...I--” She giggles slightly, appreciating his awareness and making sure she feels comfortable, but the heat that rushes over her as he stares over her hungrily is doing </span>
  <em>
    <span>something </span>
  </em>
  <span>to her. She’s suddenly feeling brave, throwing all caution to the wind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, what are you going to do about it?” she whispers, tracing her fingers slowly down his t-shirt and feeling his muscles contract nervously.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re my guest. What would you like me to do about it?” His voice is deep and low as he walks her back slowly until the backs of her legs hit his bed. It might be the lack of light in the room but she can see his eyes turn black with want. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Take it off me.” Her words barely come out a whisper, and a part of her is screaming at the fact she’s even doing this. He cups her face and attaches her lips to his in a feverish kiss, her hands instantly shooting up to nestle in his hair. He slowly guides her down to the mattress, letting her legs dangle off the edge as his frame practically engulfs her. There’s an animalistic want that neither of them are prepared for, his hands roaming every inch of her before settling on top of her chest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You wearing this bra under your shirt..you knew what it would do to me. That I wouldn’t be able to take my eyes off it.” he mutters against her lips, a large hand squeezing and fondling one of her breasts through her shirt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Note to self: thank Rose for her fashion advice.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He continues to caress her with one hand, ragged breaths and moans escaping her lips at the contact. This is what she imagined when she first got a glimpse of how big his hands are, how they practically cover her breast fully as they pinch and soothe the pliant skin. That hand quickly traces down her torso before trying to fumble with the button of her skirt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Door.” she mutters against his lips. The rational part of her wants to make sure the door is locked because with her luck someone would burst into this room thinking it was the bathroom and catch her in a complete state of disarray. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good call.” he grunts back, lifting himself off her to head towards the door. She whimpers at the loss of his warmth, but quickly uses this moment to sit up and shuck off her shirt. After hearing the swift lock of the door, he turns back around and she swears his eyes have grown double in size as he stares at her black bra. He wastes no time shucking off his own shirt before returning to her side and attaching his lips to her throat. Ben hastily unzips her skirt and slides it off her to reveal the matching black panties as her hands roam over the pale expanse of his hard chest. Damn, what the hell was is his workout regimen? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She shudders at the fact that she’s left in nothing but her panties and bra, wondering how her life got to this point. She hasn’t had a guy even look in her direction in God knows how long, and one week into her last year in college she’s practically naked in the bed of some grunge Greek god. His fingers trace down from her breast and down to her stomach before lightly tracing the dampness in between her thighs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fuck…” he whispers, his fingers moving up and down the fabric, a soft moan pressed against his throat as she presses kisses there. “What am I going to do with you, Kenobi?” he chides with a smirk.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just touch me, you ass…” she groans, his teasing putting her on the verge of combustion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So bossy.” he chuckles, quickly sliding her panties to the side before inserting a finger in between her folds. She gasps loudly at the intrusion, it’s so much bigger than her own so it stings for a moment before it feels heavenly. He generously adds a second finger, the pressure constricting her inner walls as she tries to accommodate them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ben…” she sighs loudly with a moan, completely entranced by the feeling of him working in and out of her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You gotta be quiet, sweetheart. I don’t want them to hear how sexy you sound. That’s for me only.” he groans, curling his fingers in her deeper and hitting a spot Rey never knew existed inside her. She quickly cups her hand over her mouth in an attempt to stifle the guttural gasp that leaves her body, the sound in response to how he feels inside her mixed with his filthy words. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He can feel her close to the edge, his fingers making quick work in and out of her as his thumb presses circles on her clit. That’s what catapults her into her climax, the hand covering her mouth replaced with his lips as she practically screams into his throat. His fingers start to slow down as she comes down from her orgasm as he presses his forehead against her sweat-glistened one. Her breath is heavy against his face as she flutters her eyes open, feeling the suddenly empty sensation of him pulling his fingers out of her. He sits up as she lies flat on the bed and stares up at the ceiling wondering what the hell just happened. She hears him suck his fingers into his own mouth, releasing them with a slick </span>
  <em>
    <span>pop</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re gross.” she mutters, putting her weight on her elbows and looking up at him. He’s trying to settle his own breath as he sits on the edge of the bed, the cut muscles of his chest contracting and expanding with each breath. A part of her is turned on at the fact that he’s tasting her, wondering if she’d ever allow him between her thi--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t sell yourself short, Kenobi.” he chuckles to himself before leaning over to whisper in her ear. “You taste amazing.” She ignores the flutter between her legs as she gently pushes him off her, bending down to reach her skirt on the floor. She doesn’t look at him while she puts her clothes back on, but she can sense him staring at her with intent...with </span>
  <em>
    <span>what</span>
  </em>
  <span> intent she doesn’t know. Maybe he’s mad that she didn’t reciprocate, but why would she? She didn’t ask for him to do that (well maybe not directly)...and it’s not like she doesn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span> to. He’s probably huge, just like the rest of him. She could probably try with what little experience she has and make it pleasurable for him, but what if she’s terrible at it? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She quickly glimpses at the tent in his pants and for a moment she’s magnetically drawn to it...to what it would feel like, if she could make him scream her name as he comes undone. No, no no. This has already gone farther than she anticipated and if she keeps this going she will go down a path she’s not ready for. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She walks over to the small mirror on the wall to try to smooth herself out and she hardly recognizes what she’s looking at: billowy pink lips, sweat glistened skin, a hickey the size of a golf ball on the side of her neck...she looks literally and figuratively </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucked</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/NJoNsiA">  </a>
</p><p> </p><p>“Are you sure you don’t want me to drive you home?” he asks as they rejoin the group in the living room. A lot of people have already left for the night, and it's only Rose, Hux and Finn sitting in a circle smoking a bowl and laughing together. </p><p> </p><p>“It’s fine, I only had one drink. And I live close by. Thanks though.” Rey says curtly. He senses something change in her after their ‘hook-up’ (what a trivial way to describe what happened), she’s gone quiet and more reserved. She’s barely looked at him since throwing her clothes back on, her thoughts completely cut off by mental walls made of steel. </p><p> </p><p>She gathers Rose, who’s a bumbling giggly mess, out of the room and they quickly say their goodbyes to the group of roommates. Ben stands in the doorway, placing his hand softly on the small of her back as she walks out; her eyes quickly glance up at him before shooting back down just as fast. He makes sure to watch her drive off for as long as possible until her car is completely out of view, shutting the door behind him and letting out a shaky breath.</p><p> </p><p>“I think I’m in love.” Hux slurs with a drunk smile.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah I think we figured that much after you decided to play some secret stalker/admirer when you had that class with her last year.” Finn points out, taking a swig of his beer. </p><p> </p><p>“True, but she doesn’t know that! You should’ve seen my face when they got here, that <em> she </em> was Rey’s friend! Gotta come clean now…” Hux mutters to himself. “What about you, man? How’d it go?”</p><p> </p><p>Ben runs his fingers through his hair, how does he even begin to explain what just happened? It went from good to great to weird so fast he has emotional whiplash from the whole thing. To be honest, everything about Rey has caused him emotional whiplash ever since he first saw her in the courtyard.</p><p> </p><p>“It was good...great even. Then something changed. I hope she doesn’t think I overstepped or anything.” He thinks back to the silence between them as they redressed, hoping she wasn’t uncomfortable with the tent that had formed in his jeans. The way she looked and sounded moaning underneath him had flushed any available blood in his body down south despite his best efforts. He had noticed her quickly look down at him before turning away, was she embarrassed? Disgusted by him? Ben wasn’t expecting her to reciprocate or anything, he knew that it would take some time for her to feel comfortable around him and he only wanted to make her feel good in that moment. </p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, well this was the first time I’ve ever seen her where she wasn’t scowling across campus, so I’d like to think that has something to do with how she feels about you.” Finn remarks, pointing encouragingly at him.</p><p> </p><p>Ben sighs again. Just when he thinks he’s starting to figure her out…</p><p> </p><ul>

</ul><p> </p><p>Rey has gone almost completely AWOL since Friday night, barely returning his texts or answering his calls. The only reason he knows she’s still alive is because he catches a glimpse of her as she descends the stairs into the Psych 101 lecture hall on Wednesday morning. He was hoping to have seen her during Monday’s lecture but she never showed up. Ben had frantically texted her that day asking if she was alright and it didn’t go well at all.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ben: Hey why aren’t you in class today?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Rey: I’m sick.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ben: Oh...do you need anything?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Rey: Just to be left alone.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ben: Okay. Feel better. I’m here if you change your mind.  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>He purposely got to class early today and sat next to her unassigned-assigned seat in the fourth row hoping that they could talk, but as soon as he looks over his shoulder and meets her eye she scrambles to take a different seat almost 10 rows back. He huffs in frustration, why is she avoiding him? Did she not enjoy herself on Friday night? Knowing what little he knows about Rey he finds that unlikely; if she was unsatisfied with his performance she would have <em> undoubtedly </em> made him aware, probably barking at him that ‘she could do it better herself’ or something like that. </p><p> </p><p>He smiles at the thought; that’s what makes her so enigmatic, that she is so ruthless and sure of herself but also has a soft side that he’s been very fortunate to witness. He hasn’t been able to stop thinking about her lips, the way her body writhed under his as he pushed his fingers in and out of her tight wet core, the whispering sound of his name as she came on his fingers...<em> fuck, </em> now he’s hard again. There’s no way she was faking all that. Well if it’s not her displeasure with their activities, then what is it?</p><p> </p><p>He misses the entirety of Professor Ackbar’s lecture thinking of all the possibilities when he’s taken out of his reviere with the loud sounds of dismissed students leaving the lecture hall. He practically sprints up the stairs in an attempt to catch up to her, but because she has a 10 row head start to the door he gets lost in the swarm of students. She’s halfway towards the parking lot by the time he reaches the doorway and he knows that she would probably try to run him over with her car if he even attempted to stop her. He has half a mind to drive up to her house and demand answers but he’s not looking forward to seeing how far Dr. Kenobi’s protective antics would go if a strange man showed up begging for his daughter's forgiveness. No...he would have to figure something else out. </p><p> </p><p>He returns back home to Finn and Hux playing some XBox game in the living room, flopping on the couch in annoyance as he chucks his bag across the room. Silence passes between the three of them as Ben absentmindedly watches the TV.</p><p> </p><p>“Bad day, champ?” Hux quips condescendingly. Ben uses his long strong arms to shove Hux in the shoulder, momentarily taking him out of his concentration and causing Finn to beat him in this round of whatever game they’re playing.</p><p> </p><p>“Ha! That’s what you get for trying to rile the beast.” Finn boasts. Ben rolls his eyes, taking out his phone to see if Rey has texted him at all. </p><p> </p><p>Of course she hasn’t, but there’s a notification that her blog posted a new photo and he quickly clicks on the link to see it. He hasn’t been able to stop looking at the photos she’s taken, her soft artistic perspective is so contrary to the harsh persona she puts out in real life...not to mention how perfectly alluring she looks in the rare shots of herself that she allows. Today’s picture is one he remembers her taking of the vista point he took her to last week, does that mean she’s thinking of him? Of where they had their first kiss? A part of him is hopeful that she’ll come around or at least have the decency to let him down gently, he can’t bear being in this state of purgatory with her any longer. </p><p> </p><p>“Well he shouldn’t have shoved me because I have insider information on how he can get his girl back.” Hux states matter of factly. Ben and Finn both look at him with questionable belief as Hux pauses the video game and leans back into the couch. “You’re lucky that I now have inside intel from the most reliable Rey source there is.”</p><p> </p><p>“What did Rose tell you?” Finn asks, instantly drawn into the gossip. Rose and Hux haven’t stopped texting each other since Friday night, and Rose is probably the only person who knows Rey as she truly is. </p><p> </p><p>“Well, she didn’t say much...‘<em> hoes before bros’ </em> and all that. But she did tell me that they go downtown to that shoddy club Dathomir on the second Thursday of every month to watch The Night Sisters play...which just happens to be tomorrow.” </p><p> </p><p>“So what, I should just go there and ambush her?” Ben asks. Rey doesn’t seem like the type who would appreciate him showing up to a place that he would have no other way of knowing she’d be at. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Technically </em> Rose said ‘you should totally come!’ to me, which may or may not be a loose invitation. She never stated that the invitation is just for one, so if you come with me and we just <em> happen </em> to run into them then she’d have to talk to you!”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know about this…” Ben mutters, shaking his head. Of course he wants to see her, but he’s worried that she’ll get the wrong impression and hate him even more.</p><p> </p><p>“Well it’s the only thing I’ve got unless you want to keep stalking her outside of her classes every day.” Hux huffs, crossing his arms over his chest. Ben covers his face with the nearest pillow and groans loudly into it, earning chuckles from his roommates.</p><p> </p><p>“Damn, he’s really got it bad.” Finn says, shaking his head.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this one's just a quick filler chapter but trust me...the good stuff is coming ;)</p><p>kudos &amp; comments are always appreciated!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/CRml9X3">
    
  </a>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rose is once again rummaging through Rey’s closet to find her something to wear for Dathomir, but there's something a little bit more innocuous about her this time. She’s pulling out dresses that Rey hasn’t even looked at in years (from her younger, more reckless days) and she just can’t read Rose’s intentions at all.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why the hell did you pick this one?” Rey demands, lifting up a skin tight black body-con dress that hasn’t seen the light of day in two years. It’s sleeveless with little flecks of sparkle, the hem just reaching her mid thigh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s cute and shows off your banging bod! Plus it’s our monthly trip to Dathomir, we should get a little sexy!” Rose herself is wearing a long sleeve mesh top with a black bandeau bra underneath and high waisted black skinny jeans. Rey abhors the idea of ‘sex appeal’, mostly because she doesn’t think she has it; her boobs are too small, her figure is stick straight, and her build is more athletic even though she’s never lifted a dumbbell in her entire life. The only time she’d ever felt even remotely sexy was with Ben, how she pressed against him in the car or the look on his face when she took off her shirt...but she </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> think about it now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A part of her feels bad for ghosting him like this. She’s used every inch of willpower to watch the phone ring next to her until it finally goes to voicemail, unable to actually listen to the voicemails he leaves in case it breaks down her guard. What’s happened with him has probably been nothing more than some carnal, lust-filled lapse in judgement for the both of them, there’s no way he feels anything deeper for her. She just has to get him off her mind and he’ll eventually give up, they always do. Once they realize how difficult and snarky and damaged she is they always just give up and move onto the next girl, and she’s left picking up the pieces. This time will be no different.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She lets Dad give his safety warning spiel before getting into a Lyft and making their way downtown. 20 minutes later they pull up to Dathomir and make their way into the dark club, lit in only fluorescent multi-colored string lights lining the ceiling. Pretty soon The Night Sisters come on stage and start playing their hits, Rose and Rey dancing and singing along liberally to the alternative pop rock music. She feels loose and free in the music, just another body in the crowd that no one is looking at, able to be and act like whoever she wants. Several songs pass before the heat of the club catches up to her, practically panting as she catches her breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m gonna go get a drink!” she yells over the music to Rose, looking over at the bar. She notices two tall figures standing at the bar facing each other with their side profiles visible to the dance floor. Her breath hitches when she notices the unmistakable short red hair and the long black hair that both figures have…</span>
  <em>
    <span>you’ve gotta be fucking kidding me</span>
  </em>
  <span>. She looks over to Rose with a grief-stricken look, her friend just smiling and nudging her to go. This bitch really thinks she’s slick, trying to set her friend </span>
  <em>
    <span>and</span>
  </em>
  <span> herself up in one night. Secretly telling two guys to show up somewhere they </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew</span>
  </em>
  <span> they’d both be at would definitely do the trick. Gotta give Rose credit for that. She rolls her eyes at her friend, who gives her a light shove in the bars’ direction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>She makes her way through the crowd, and it's only until she’s halfway up to the bar do the two men make eye contact with her. She’s only focused on one pair of dark eyes, the other quickly excusing himself with a nod before disappearing into the crowd. Ben turns his back to her as she takes a deep breath and occupies the previously taken space next to him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“One water please.” she motions to the bartender, who nods. He quickly slides her over a glass of ice water, relishing in the cool liquid as it passes down her throat. She doesn’t look at him right away, but she can already feel his eyes on her. “You are relentless, you know that?” she remarks with a chuckle before turning to meet him. She softens a bit when his eyes meet hers, they’re warm and inviting and </span>
  <em>
    <span>familiar</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He’s leaning over the bar slightly in his signature black t-shirt and black jeans, his hair effortlessly wavy and just dying to have her fingers entangled in it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I could say the same about you.” he retorts, taking a sip of what looks like whiskey. She gives him a confused look. “You are so relentless to try to distance yourself from me when I know that you feel it too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And what exactly is it that I </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Mr. Solo?” She leans in closer to him, her heart racing. He has to be bluffing, there’s no way that she’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span> easy to read. That he could possibly know that she’s restraining herself from him because she fears it won't be reciprocated. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He leans in further to close the space between them, his lips just barely hovering over her ear. “You can’t stop thinking about us...in my room. The way I made you feel good, the way you made me feel like a god amongst men. How you squirmed under me as you screamed my--” Her hand hastily cups over his mouth in an attempt to silence him. The fluttering feeling between her legs is back again but she tries to suppress it, tries to think of </span>
  <em>
    <span>anything </span>
  </em>
  <span>that will distract her from materializing his dirty words. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re wrong…” she stammers. She hates that he’s right, she hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it. She’s tried to touch herself at night in the same way but she can’t do it without thinking that her fingers are his. He gently peels her hand from on top of his mouth, placing a lingering kiss to her knuckles before returning it to her side. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay, I feel it too. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” Her heart is hammering in her chest at his words, words that she’s simultaneously hoping and fearing to hear. He motions over to the dance floor with his eyes. “I was watching you out there before. I’ve never seen you look so sexy--”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’s instantly cut off by a sudden stop in the music, causing him to loudly vocalize his admission to her in front of the whole club. A hundred pairs of eyes turn to look at them, breaking out in a fit of giggles, whoops and whistles. He quickly looks down at the bar in embarrassment, but not before she notices a rare creeping blush on his cheeks. She chuckles shyly both at his awkward moment but also at his admission. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The next song starts playing a few seconds later, the rest of the club turning its attention away from them. He looks up as if to check if the coast is clear, a pained laugh escaping his lips. She should probably talk to him, get everything off her chest and get their split over with. But given what just happened it's not particularly easy to talk in a crowded club so she grips his hand and motions her head to the front door. He looks at her with a sudden awe and quickly follows her, his hand squeezing hers as they maneuver their way through the crowd. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The crisp night air hits them as they exit the club, him trailing behind her as their hands hold each other. She walks to where the corner of the building and the start of a back alleyway meet and leans up against the brick, crossing her arms over her chest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, you wanna talk? So talk.” she declares, looking him up and down.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just want to know why you won’t? Why you’ve been ignoring me this entire week.” his voice is a little more stern now, almost pained for information.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I told you, I was sick…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s bullshit and you know it, Rey!” The sudden raise of his voice takes her aback. She’s not seen this side of him yet, but she does remember that he has a mysterious reputation that possibly supersedes her own. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m no picnic myself</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he once told her. She doesn’t want to attempt to find out where this could go if she’s not honest so she lets out a shaky breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just...don’t know how to do this. Any of this.” she motions her hands to the space between them. His puzzled look softens the previously angry one.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What, between us? What do you mean? What do you want this to be?” His voice is a little gentler now, genuinely concerned.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...I don’t know…” She hates how small she sounds, how she can’t even meet his eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is that what this is about? You’re scared of labels? Whether or not you want me to be your boyfriend?” Now he’s truly perplexed. “Is it really all or nothing with you, Rey?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I--” she begins before quickly clamping her mouth shut. She doesn’t even know how to answer that. She doesn’t know what it’s like to be a loving doting girlfriend, so she thinks if she cuts herself off from him completely it won’t ever have to get to that point. That she’ll never have to fear him breaking her heart.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He lets out a sigh, slowly running his hand through his hair. “Listen...I like you. And I </span>
  <em>
    <span>think</span>
  </em>
  <span> you like me...I don’t know for sure, you’re not exactly easy to read.” She lets out a snort of laughter, rolling her eyes at him. “But if you’re worried about titles, there doesn’t have to be any right now. It can just be you and me, in whatever capacity you want. No strings attached. I just can’t stand the idea of losing you completely.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His words hit her like a tidal wave. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I just can’t stand the idea of losing you completely. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Her cold metal heart warms a little at the fact that he’s not giving up on her, that he wants to make this (whatever </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> is) work between them. She reaches out to take the fabric of his t-shirt between her fingers, gently tugging him closer to her until there’s no space between their bodies. His arms come up to either side of her face, palming flat against the brick wall. He cowers over her as she tilts her chin up to meet his gaze, his lips barely hovering over hers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’s giving her a choice, letting her make the final move to solidify that they will try whatever this is. Her heart is like a sledgehammer in her ribs as she finally closes the gap between their lips, the warm spark flooding her in a way she can’t describe with words. Their lips move in tandem as he takes his hands off the wall and attaches them to her waist to pull her closer. Her arms snake up his body before wrapping around his neck, instinctively moving him even closer to her. There is no place where her body ends and his starts, they have completely molded into one being as they explore each other for an undetermined amount of time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A stray wolf whistle that walks past takes them out of the heavy intoxication of each other's lips. Rey buries her head in his chest as he gives a menacing glare at the perpetrator. She breathes heavily into his shirt, taking in the deep musky cologne as his arms wrap around her lower back. He presses a quick kiss to the top of her head, the small gesture sending a flutter in her heart.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let’s go back inside. I’m sure Rose and Hux are wondering where we are.” Rey states quietly looking up at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fat chance.” he scoffs. “They’ve practically got tunnel vision around each other. I wouldn’t be surprised if they never realized we left.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s true,” she laughs. “He’s practically got her to completely forget about Strange Secret Admirer Guy.” Rey says absentmindedly to herself, not expecting Ben to know what she’s talking about. He stifles a choked laugh. “Wait, why are you laughing?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I--” he tries to say before bursting out into uncontrolled laughter. Ben buries his face in the crook of her shoulder, his breathy laughter tickling her neck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What? Why are you-- oh my God, you’ve got to be kidding!” The realization hits her like a ton of bricks, causing Ben to practically double over in even more thunderous mirth. They had a class together last year, Rey remembers Rose being way too shy (which is saying a lot for her) to talk to the mysterious redhead in her biochem class, but shortly after she started receiving cute notes and messages from a secret admirer that turned into email exchanges and text messages from an unknown number. Who would’ve thought fate would have brought their best friends together?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, it’s insane how that happened. But you can’t tell her! He’s gonna do it eventually, he’s just gotta grow some balls first.” Ben snorts, coming up from his spot under her chin to place a quick kiss on her cheek. He swings his arm over her shoulders and guides her back into the club, Rey trying not to notice the obvious stares as they walk through the hallways and back to the main dance floor. They eventually catch up with Hux and Rose who, to no one's surprise, did not realize Ben and Rey had left. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The rest of the night is spent jamming to the live music, dancing and sharing some drinks. Hux and Rose are completely enamored with each other, dancing and spinning around in their own little world. Ben is holding Rey from behind with his arms thrown over her shoulders as they sway to the music. She occasionally teases him by brushing against him a little deeper, earning a deep groan in her ear. She can’t help it, she’s never been able to elicit this kind of reaction from someone before and it has her completely drunk on power.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once the night begins winding down, the guys invite them to go get something to eat at the 24 hour diner around the corner. It’s only midnight, so Rey can spare the extra hour she has before Dr. Kenobi puts out a missing persons warrant. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh God, this is like some weird double date.” Rey whispers over to Rose as they walk in pairs to Maz’s Diner. The guys have taken the lead in front of them on the sidewalk, sharing their own whispers between them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why is it weird? We’re friends and they’re friends. Just a couple of friends who have definitely shared some kisses and </span>
  <em>
    <span>other things </span>
  </em>
  <span>between them going for burgers!” Rose mumbles happily, glad to be guided by Rey down the street as she wobbles in her heels. As Rose continues to mumble to herself Rey catches Ben looking at her over his shoulder, a quick smirk appearing before he turns back around. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hope you're enjoying the story so far! please let me know your thoughts :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/o0XolfD">  </a>
</p><p> </p><p>As dysfunctional as the Kenobi family can be there’s one thing that they can always agree on: Pancake Sunday’s, a long time tradition of making unique pancakes every Sunday morning. This week's menu consists of orange zest pancakes, chocolate cherry pancakes, and...<em> mac n’ cheese </em> pancakes. They’ve all surprisingly gone off without a hitch, Dr. Kenobi not managing to set the kitchen on fire and Kaydel managing not to get the electric mixer tangled in her hair. It’s a pleasant day to laugh and reminisce, so far free of typical Kenobi family drama.</p><p> </p><p>As Rey digs into a chocolate cherry pancake she gets a buzz from her pocket. She already knows who it is before she even looks at the screen, that annoying flutter in her chest ever present.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ben: Good morning, beautiful. What are you up to today?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Rey: It’s Pancake Sunday. Very important Kenobi family past time.</b>
</p><p>
  <b>[Image sent]</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ben: That looks amazing, I’ll be sure to put my order in for next week. </b>
</p><p> </p><p>Rey chuckles to herself as she looks down at her phone under the table. She sent him a picture of Dr. Kenobi posed in front of the stacks of pancakes on the dining room table, looking utterly chuffed with himself at their success. </p><p> </p><p>“Rey, no phones at the table. Especially on Pancake Sunday.” he chides, pointing a fork full of mac n’ cheese pancake at her.</p><p> </p><p>“She’s texting a boy, Dad!” Kaydel taunts joyfully with a laugh. Rey’s face goes beet red, a death glare shot in the direction of her sister.</p><p> </p><p>“Boy? What boy? How come I don’t know about a boy?” Dr. Kenobi rambles in confusion, probably more perplexed that this is coming from his eldest daughter and not the youngest.</p><p> </p><p>“Dad, it’s not a big deal...” Rey huffs, hoping the conversation will be dropped. She knows it won’t but its a valiant effort nonetheless.</p><p> </p><p>“I think I’ll be the one to determine if it's a big deal.” her father retorts. She groans and lays her forehead flat on the table. Ben and Rey have been <em> whatever they are </em>for about three weeks now, hanging out in between classes and occasionally on the weekends. If it were up to Ben they would see each other every day, but Rey has been careful to keep some distance between them for fear of getting too attached too fast. It was also so that her dad wouldn’t get suspicious of her constantly going out, plus not giving Kaydel the satisfaction of suddenly being allowed more social time. She’s been pretty good at keeping things discreet, but it looks like that’s all about to go out the window.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s really not the crisis situation you imagine, Dad. We’ve just been hanging out. We’re actually going to see the History of the Mandalorian exhibit at the museum today.”</p><p> </p><p>“Rey. You can’t continue to see this boy until I meet him. Understood?” His back is turned to her as he puts the dishes in the sink, so she quickly takes the opportunity to roll her eyes and make a face while he can’t see. She also swiftly kicks Kaydel under the table as punishment for snitching on her, a silent yelp escaping her sister.</p><p> </p><p>“Ugh fine! Award for Most Dramatic Dad of the Year goes to Dr. Obi-Wan Kenobi!” she chides sarcastically, quickly taking her own dishes to the sink before stomping her way upstairs. She pulls out her phone to warn Ben of the impending doom.</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Rey: Heads up...Dad wants to meet you today before we go to the museum.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ben: Okay. Should I whip out my three-piece suit?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Rey: Lol don’t you dare! Just be normal and we’ll both hopefully survive this.</b>
</p><p> </p><p><b></b> <b>Ben: Aye aye, captain. See you at 3 ;)</b></p><p> </p><ul>

</ul><p> </p><p>Rey bounces her leg nervously as she sits on the stairs, making sure she can get a clear view of the front door when Ben pulls up, which should be any minute now. She can’t tell if she’s nervous because of the real possibility of Dad embarrassing her or that <em> whatever </em> is going on between them will feel more real. Meeting the parents is a big deal in any relationship, and when you add the complication of them not <em> technically </em> being in a relationship it makes it all the more confusing. </p><p> </p><p>She’s opted for a pair of light wash jeans, a black cropped tank and an oversized grey flannel, her white Vans tapping against the wooden floor in anticipation. A familiar black Jeep suddenly pulls into the driveway and her heart rate increases rapidly. Ben steps out in a dark grey and black flannel (because <em> of course </em> they would accidentally match) and black jeans. They make eye contact through the front door glass and her anxieties instantly melt, his dimpled smile assuring her that it will be alright. She walks up to the door and almost instantly hears her dad get up from the couch to meet them there. She shoots her father a warning glance and he returns one in jest before she opens the door.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi.” she breathes, looking up at him with a shy smile. </p><p> </p><p>“Hi.” he smiles back at her, almost instantly turning his attention to her dad. “Hello, Dr. Kenobi. I’m Ben, Ben Solo.” Ben extends a large hand out to her father who instantly takes it in a firm handshake.</p><p> </p><p>“Nice to meet you, Ben. Please come in.” Dr. Kenobi gestures politely. Ben and Rey follow her father into the kitchen, Ben momentarily grabbing her hand to give it a quick squeeze while her father isn’t looking. “Can I get you anything to drink, Ben? Water, coffee, <em> beer </em>?”</p><p> </p><p>Rey groans to herself. The first test, or should she say <em> trap </em>, her father puts out to him. If he accepts the beer then her father will instantly write him off. Only one guy has been stupid enough to take the bait, some awful pothead Rey was about to go on a date with freshman year that evidently didn’t come to fruition. </p><p> </p><p>“Water would be great. Thank you, sir.” Ben nods nervously. <em> First test passed </em>, Rey sighs to herself. Dr. Kenobi silently pours three glasses of water from the pitcher in the fridge, sliding it over to them from across the island counter. “You have a beautiful home, Dr. Kenobi.” Ben continues, trying to fill the slightly awkward of silence. Compliments are always a plus in Dad’s book, as long as they’re well intentioned.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you. I’ve been working on some renovation projects when I’m not at the hospital.” Dr. Kenobi remarks, taking a sip of water. Rey can practically see the cogs in her father’s mind turning, trying to think of what to ask him to learn more about this boy his eldest daughter has brought home. “You said your last name was Solo, wasn’t it? Any relation to Han down at Falcon Motors?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes sir, he’s my father.” Ben nods, slightly taken aback at question. Rey is equally baffled, there’s no possible way…</p><p> </p><p>“Wait, you know his dad?” Rey blurts out in confusion. Ben rarely talks about his parents, and she never asks. She figures there’s some kind of emotional past with them he’s not ready to share so she doesn’t pry. </p><p> </p><p>“It would appear so.” Dr. Kenobi chuckles, even he’s slightly shocked at the coincidence. “I’ve been taking my car to Han for years, he’s a great guy.” </p><p> </p><p>“Wow, small world.” Ben replies, raising his eyebrows with a nod. Dr. Kenobi and Rey both nod in agreement. Another moment of silence passes between them, but maybe it’s not as awkward as it was before.</p><p> </p><p>“Well, you guys should get going. Don’t want to miss your reservation time for that exhibit.” Dr. Kenobi finally states, taking another sip of water. Rey practically lights up, the interrogation (if you could even call it that) is finally over and Ben has obviously passed. Maybe it’s the respect Dr. Kenobi has for Ben’s father that cuts the questioning short, but she will happily take it as she beams up at her father.</p><p> </p><p>“Perfect, thanks Dad!” Rey rushes over to his side of the counter to place a quick kiss to his cheek before turning around to grab Ben’s hand. His hand just barely slips out of her reach as Ben walks over to her father’s side of the counter and shakes his hand again, a silent but mutual agreement passing between them.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you, sir. It was great to meet you.” Ben smiles.</p><p> </p><p>“And you as well. Say hello to your father for me.”</p><p> </p><p>“Will do, sir. Thanks.” Rey has come over to their side again, standing next to Ben as his hand softly brushes over hers to indicate that he’ll take it once they leave. Must be as a sign of respect or something but Rey’s heart swells at the consideration anyway. They begin to make their way to the door as she grabs her small purse and calls out another goodbye to her father.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t stay out too late, Rey.” Dr. Kenobi warns softly, not as intensely as usual. Maybe it <em> was </em> a good idea to bring Ben around to her dad, maybe he’s finally starting to treat her like an adult. </p><p> </p><p>Once the front door closes behind them, Rey lets out a ragged exhale she didn’t know she was holding. Ben chuckles to himself as he unlocks the car and they both get in. They drive down the street and he stops abruptly at the stop sign before turning her face towards his to give her a searing kiss. She’s taken aback but quickly smiles into it, returning the kiss without hesitation.</p><p> </p><p>“Sorry, I’ve been wanting to do that since I saw you. Just didn’t want to do it in front of your dad.” he mumbles quietly against her lips. She giggles, giving him a quick kiss before returning to face the road. Thankfully no one’s waiting at the stop sign behind them so he continues their route to the museum.</p><p> </p><p>“So has my dad permanently traumatized you from ever hanging out with me again?” Rey jokes half-seriously.</p><p> </p><p>“When are you going to realize that it’s gonna take a lot more than that to get rid of me?” Ben jokes back with a smirk. He slowly reaches his arm over the center console to interlace his fingers with hers, giving her hand another gentle squeeze. </p><p> </p><p>The smile on her face is probably ridiculously goofy but at this moment she doesn’t care. She can’t help but stare at the striking profile of the man who’s slowly chipping away at her icy heart. </p><p> </p><ul>

</ul><p> </p><p>After a few hours at the museum she’s back at Ben’s place, straddling his lap as he kisses all the air out of her lungs. His roommates are thankfully not home, Hux out to dinner with Rose and Finn studying at the library, so she lets her moans run free as she grinds into him. </p><p> </p><p>She seemed to relax a lot more after Ben met her dad, and that comfort translated in them barely able to keep their hands off each other while walking through the History of the Mandalorian exhibit. Whether it was holding hands, him gripping her waist, her kissing him behind a pillar, they were practically attached the entire day. When he invited her back to his place as the late afternoon sun began to peek through the clouds she couldn’t say yes fast enough. </p><p> </p><p>It’s not long before she sheds her oversized flannel to expose the tight cropped tank underneath, suddenly displaying the fact that she neglected to wear a bra today. His eyes practically bulge out of his head as he takes both of her clothed breasts between his hands, kneading them gently as she tilts her head back in pleasure.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re smart for not telling me you weren’t wearing a bra. I probably would’ve sucked bruises onto your pretty tits behind a statue if I knew.” he breathes, bending forward to kiss a clothed breast as he squeezes the other. All she can do is gasp at the sensation, she didn’t think she was that sensitive there but if he continues any further she could probably come from just this. He pulls down the neckline of the top to do exactly what he said, sucking and licking the swell of her breast that will undoubtedly leave a mark that thankfully no one else but her would ever see.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Fuck </em>...Ben….” she whispers, grinding further into the erection in his jeans. He’s already thrown off his own top, her hands carelessly touching every inch of his expansive chest. </p><p> </p><p>“Tell me how you want to come today, sweetheart. Fingers? Mouth?” he groans deeply into the skin of her cleavage.</p><p> </p><p>“Mouth! Mouth…” she babbles without thinking. If she wasn’t already consumed with lust she would be self-conscious about him putting his mouth on her, but she shoves that part of her away for the chance to feel those pillowy lips where she needs them most.</p><p> </p><p>“Of course, baby. On one condition.” he whispers roughly, stopping his ministrations on her breasts to look up at her. </p><p> </p><p>“What?” she hums absent-mindedly, at this point it would take a lot of her to deny his request.</p><p> </p><p>“I want you on top.” he grins before ravaging her lips on his again. Her mind practically short circuits at the thought of sitting on his face, but her body is already ramping up to go. Without breaking away from the kiss she stands up from the bed to remove her jeans, his large hands quickly going down to help her. He manages to get both her jeans and panties off in one fell swoop, tossing them off to the side. He lays back on the bed, turning to look at her staring at him in nothing but her top.</p><p> </p><p>“I'm nervous,” she whispers. The velocity of their pace slows down for a moment as he reaches out to take her hand.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you want to stop?”</p><p> </p><p>“No.”</p><p> </p><p>“Do you trust me?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.” The answer leaves her mouth before her brain even has a moment to register it. It’s the part of her that trusts him wholeheartedly, who feels safe around him and wants to be with him. </p><p> </p><p>That’s the part of her that pushes its way to the front of her mind as she climbs onto the bed to straddle his chest, quickly shimmying down so that her knees line up with his head. Her heart is pounding, but he quickly takes her hand to lace their fingers together. She can feel his warm breath against her as he kisses the inside of her thighs, her eyes screwing shut and her bottom lip between her teeth. He starts slowly licking a stripe across her and her entire body vibrates at the simultaneous sensations of his tongue, his nose bumping her clit and his facial hair tickling the inside of her thighs. </p><p> </p><p>She squirms on top of him as he works eagerly under her, exploring every inch he can reach with his mouth. The hand that’s not holding hers reaches up to palm one of her breasts, the dual stimulation causing her to moan loudly and inadvertently grind herself into his face. He hums in approval as the pace quickens, his tongue darting in and out of her in a way that has her practically screaming his name. She builds up the courage to open her eyes and look down at him and the vision below practically sends a new wave of wetness between her folds. </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Fuck </em> , Ben. That feels-- <em> so good </em>. Don’t stop…” she pants breathlessly, unable to look down anymore at the gorgeous man between her thighs. It’s all too much for her as she recklessly bucks her hips into his face, doubling over on top of him as she comes onto his lips. He doesn’t stop even while she’s shaking and screaming obscenities, lapping up every drop of her until she shudders from the overstimulation and climbs off him. She lays flat on her stomach facing in the opposite direction, her face directly in line with his crotch. With ragged breaths she curiously reaches out to the tent in his pants, brushing her fingertips across it before laying her palm flat against it. </p><p> </p><p>In their previous <em> excursions </em> over the past few weeks it's either him making her come or them coming together from dry humping, but she’s never just made him come on her own. She’s also never been enthusiastic about handjobs or blowjobs, the guys she’s been with before practically expecting it from her but never would reciprocate. But there’s something different about Ben, he always wants her to come first and they’ve been at this for almost a month and he’s never even asked her to go down on him. It’s for those reasons she actually <em> wants </em> to do it (or at least try, she has no idea if she even can given his size). Rey sits up on her knees as she begins to unbutton his jeans. She can feel him intake a sharp breath at the contact which only gives her the spark to go further.</p><p> </p><p>“Are you sure? You don’t--have to…” he stammers, barely able to get his words out as she palms him through the fabric. He helps her kick his jeans off, adding them to the discarded pile of clothing beneath the bed.</p><p> </p><p>“I want to. I have no idea if I’ll be any good so you gotta tell me what you want.” she chuckles nervously. She might as well be honest with him that she’s not a complete blowjob master, so any and all help to make him feel good is appreciated.</p><p> </p><p>“Trust me...you just doing <em> that </em>...is already fucking amazing.” he sighs, scooting himself up to lean against the headboard eager to watch. She places a slow kiss against his boxer briefs before pulling them down and letting his manhood spring free. </p><p> </p><p>This is the first time she’s seeing it completely and <em> holy shit </em>, what has she gotten herself into? It’s big but not obnoxiously big, so she thinks she can manage at least half of it in her mouth. She wraps her hand around him to give him some experimental pumps, her pulse quickening when she already hears him groaning in pleasure. She teases a long lick up the shaft before swirling the tip in her mouth, her hand continuing to work its way up and down him. A string of expletives escapes his lips as his hand comes up to push the loose strands of hair from her face. Her game plan is to take half of him in her hand and half in her mouth and he seems more than agreeable to it, chanting her name like prayer. </p><p> </p><p>Just as she’s finally getting the hang of it he’s already groaning to her that he’s close. She only has a short time left to decide how this is going to end. She has never let anyone come in her mouth, always indicated by the fact that they have a diet consisting of cheese puffs and Mountain Dew. But Ben feels different...it’s not like she thinks it’ll be pleasant but she doesn’t think it’ll be <em> unpleasant </em> . She’s got seconds left until the inevitable, so she just thinks <em> fuck it </em> and let’s it happen.</p><p> </p><p>“<em> Fuck </em> ! Rey….” he grunts, his body tensing up as she feels warm spurts shooting into her mouth. She doesn’t know what to expect so the sensation catches her completely off guard, keeping her mouth tightly closed to avoid spillage. It’s actually not that bad, she can only describe it as salty with a twinge of <em> man </em>. She pops him out of her mouth as her hand slowly begins to decelerate, his tense muscles finally starting to relax after his spend. He immediately sits up as she begins to wipe the corners of her mouth on the sheets of his bed, the sounds of panting breaths between them. He cups her face in between his large hands, gently rubbing circles with the pads of his thumbs.</p><p> </p><p>“Who’s the gross one now?” he smirks coyly, pushing a strand of hair out of her face.</p><p> </p><p>“Still you.” she retorts, pushing him off with a giggle. She climbs off the bed, throws her panties back on and pads out of the room to the bathroom. He tucks himself back into his boxer briefs before slamming his back into the mattress with a gratified sigh. This girl was going to be the death of him. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hope you guys are enjoying the story so far! kudos and comments make me smile like a goofball so please let me know what you think :)</p><p>also, if you like my writing feel free to check out some of my other works! i have 2 completed stories, 3 oneshots and I'm about to start a new prompted story in the next few days! </p><p>until next time!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope you all are keeping yourselves safe during this very hard time. My dm's on twitter are always open if you want to talk.</p>
<p>This weeks update gets into Ben and Rey's respective trauma and how it's shaped their personalities. CW: mention of childhood neglect, mention of minor character death</p>
<p>love you all so much ♥️</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/IcCIsCB">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>There’s a cloud of billowing dark smoke coming out of BB’s hood. This <em> can’t </em> be a good sign. Rey is finally on her way home after running some errands all afternoon. BB has been making her typical sputtering noises but something feels different now, more angry and intense than usual. Of course this has to happen while she’s driving down Rodian Blvd, so she needs to pull over somewhere before she gets herself killed. Over the smoke she happens to spot a mechanic shop after the next traffic light so she quickly pulls into its driveway without second thought. There’s an older gentleman working on a car in the garage but immediately stops to meet her when he sees the cloud of smoke. Rey quickly shuts off the engine and rushes out of the car, fanning the smoke out of her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Looks like you got a little bit of a problem there.” the mechanic says sarcastically. He’s got a face full of grey stubble to match the shining grey hair on his head. His jumpsuit is covered in grease as he attempts to wipe more of it off his hands. His eyes squint when he laughs, his voice deep and gravelly and a little familiar. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You don’t say?” she quips back with a smirk. He chuckles heartily back at her, at least the guys got a sense of humor. She glances up to the top of the building to see its name in big bold letters: <em> Falcon Motors </em>. Her heart drops to her ass as she looks back to the man...Ben’s father. She has a quick mental debate on whether she should actually give herself away, but her curiosity wins out in the end. “Are you Han?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That depends who’s asking.” he laughs, crossing his arms over his chest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You work on my dad’s car, Dr. Kenobi, if you remember him.” He has a quick ‘ah-ha’ moment, nodding his head in acknowledgement. “And I’m also a friend of your son, Ben.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben? You’re friends with Ben? Well, why didn’t ya say so!” Han roars surprised laughter, shaking his head. “C’mon in, I can get you set up with the paperwork.” His reaction surprises her, but she follows him into the small front office of the shop. It's themed as a Route 66 pit stop with car memorabilia lining the walls, plush leather couches and a vintage looking gas pump in the corner. He grabs a clipboard and pen from behind the desk and hands it to her. “What did you say your name was again?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, sir. Rey Kenobi.” She doesn’t know why she sounds so shy, is she intimidated by the fact that she’s meeting Ben’s dad? Ben at least got a warning when meeting hers but it’s not her fault she just happened to stumble upon him. Plus it’s not <em> exactly </em> in the most ideal circumstances. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey...that’s a nice name.” He smiles warmly at her with a nod. “Ok Rey, I’m gonna go check out the car while you fill this out. I’ll just be a few minutes.” He promptly leaves the same way he came. Rey takes her time filling out the necessary paperwork in an attempt to calm her nerves, finishing at the exact moment he walks back in.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What’s the damage?” she jokes half-seriously. She’s worried that BB’s a goner this time, or that she’ll have to shell out her entire life savings just to get her back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Nothing too bad, just oil pump failure. I’ll have to replace it but I won’t be able to get the part until tomorrow. Are you going to be okay with leaving it here overnight?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, I guess so. Let me just get someone to pick me up.” she nods. Now that that part of the crisis is out of the way, she's got to figure out how to get herself home. She can’t call her father because he’s working at the hospital right now, Kaydel doesn’t have her own car and Rose is out of town at her cousin’s wedding. That leaves only one person.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: Hi, my car broke down. Would you be able to come pick me up?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Holy shit Rey, are you okay???</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Where are you? I’ll come straight away</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: I’m fine, I managed to pull over before anything happened</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Funnily enough, I stumbled upon your dad’s shop. He said he’s going to fix BB for me</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: You’re at Falcon???</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Ugh, okay. I’ll be there in 10</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He ends up arriving in 8 minutes, practically speeding into the driveway like he’s in the next Fast and Furious movie. She quickly comes out of the front office to greet him, but she already feels a tense energy radiating from his demeanor. He has a permanent scowl on his face as he pulls her into a hug, rubbing small circles on her back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you okay?” he asks stoically. It should be a comforting question, but the sour tone in his voice bites at her in the opposite effect. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m fine. Are you?” she pulls away to look up at him. His features are stern and he seems to be looking everywhere except at her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” he sneers, his retort is sharp and cold.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben!” Han walks out of the garage enthusiastically. Rey can practically feel Ben tense up even further at the sound of his father's voice. “What are the odds that your friend Rey here would stumble upon my place?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Not small enough apparently.” he counters with a grit of his teeth. Rey is taken aback by his sudden coldness, this is a Ben she doesn’t recognize...and it might be for good reason.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, I’m glad it worked out.” Han says before turning to Rey. “I should have her all good to go by tomorrow afternoon.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you, Han.” she smiles. He had kept her company while she waited for Ben, Rey joking about the many times BB has been a drama queen and Han laughing and telling her to stop calling him ‘sir’. There is something very warm and friendly about him that she appreciated, she can definitely see where Ben gets his annoyingly smooth charm. “Oh one more thing, how much is all this going to cost? I can bring you the money tomorrow…”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, Rey. Don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of it for you.” Ben cuts her off, putting a firm hand to her waist.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>What </em>?” she exclaims incredulously. “No, Ben. I can’t ask you to do that…” she continues, shaking her head. Why would he even offer to pay? He has no obligation to and she would never ask him to, even if he was her boyfriend (which he’s not). </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, <em> neither </em> of you have to worry about it. It’s on the house, Rey.” Han states matter of factly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Okay, now this is <em> really </em> starting to take a turn. “Oh no, Han...I couldn’t possibly--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Nonsense! Like I said, any friend of Ben’s is a friend of mine. Consider it the friends and family discount.” he chuckles with a wink in his son’s direction. She feels his hand at her waist tighten momentarily. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I...thank you, sir...<em>Han </em>. I really appreciate it.” she stammers, floored by his generosity. She can’t fathom why Ben has such a coarse attitude to his father when he’s clearly been nothing but nice to her in a time of trouble.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, thanks. Let’s go Rey, I’ll take you home.” Ben states, his grip turning her towards the Jeep. The sheer strength of him doesn’t give her much time to protest so she follows his lead, quickly turning as she walks to wave and thank Han again. Even though he’s on edge he has some semblance of manners to open the car door for her, but it doesn’t exactly make her feel cared for when he practically slams it closed. They’re both silent when he finally pulls out of the driveway and down Rodian Blvd, his grip on the steering wheel tight enough to make his knuckles go white. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Do I even want to know what the fuck has gotten into you?” She’s suddenly feeling very feisty, ready to pick a fight with him. She just can’t wrap her head around why he’s acting this way and she’s determined to find out why.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What did he say to you? Huh?” Ben asks quickly, taking his eyes off the road momentarily to look at her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“About what?” she demands, clearly now having even more questions than answers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He groans to himself. “Well, what then? Did you look him up and go over there to meet him for yourself? To <em> learn </em> something about me that I haven’t told you yet?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben, what the fuck are you talking about? My car was ready to fucking <em> explode </em> in the middle of the street and you think I pulled some petty bullshit to try to meet your dad? Are you fucking insane?” Her blood is boiling at the thought that he would even say that, that he would be so selfish to assume this situation has anything to do with him. He opens his mouth to say something but quickly shuts it. “I don’t know what kind of <em> daddy issues </em> you have but he was a good guy to me. He helped me…”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well that’s just fan-fucking-tastic isn’t it?” He’s shouting now, the sudden increase in volume making her jump in her seat. “That good ole Han Solo came to your rescue? Well I can assure you that he’s not some fucking superhero. Don’t be so fucking naive, Rey.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She’s fuming now. Her fists are balled up at her sides and she’s practically vibrating with anger. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Pull over.” she states quietly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Pull. Over.” </em>she grits her teeth and raises her voice. He makes no motion to listen to her. “Ben, pull this fucking car over now or I’m going to jump out!” she practically screams. The car almost instantly veers to the right, pulling in a spot parallel to the sidewalk. She instantly starts fumbling with her seatbelt.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Where the fuck are you going?” he demands, trying to grab her hand. She senses confusion and a bit of shock laced with the already present anger in his voice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Anywhere but here. Away from <em> you</em>.” she grunts, snatching her arm away just a second before it's in his grasp.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey! Stop! Please, let’s talk about this--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No! You obviously didn’t want to talk about it before you went all apeshit on me with your accusations! Look, I don’t know what <em> this </em> is,” she motions with her arms in his direction “but I want nothing to do with it.” She ceremoniously slams the door behind her, turning on her heel to walk away. She can practically hear him roar with rage before revving up his engine and speeding away, the squeak of his tires harsh against the pavement. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>It takes her about 30 minutes to walk the rest of the way home, taking the scenic route through the neighborhood to find some peace to think. She can’t understand why Ben was behaving that way, it was practically at the sheer mention of his father that he completely flipped into a new person. Her mind is swimming with thoughts as she approaches her street, the setting sun painting the sidewalk in a warm pink glow. She’s so entranced in her own thoughts she barely recognizes the familiar black Jeep parked outside of her house, a tall brooding figure leaning against the car door. She sighs to herself, mentally gearing up for another verbal battle.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Look if you’re here to yell some more, spare me. I’m exhausted--” she begins, slumping her shoulders as she attempts to walk past him. He doesn’t let her get very far before reaching to take her hand with a hard softness (yeah, she doesn’t really get how that’s possible either) that causes her to gasp quietly. She looks up to meet his eyes, they’re glassy and a lot softer since the last time she saw them. The heat of his hand on hers sends an electric pulse down her spine.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can we talk? Like actually talk?” he asks morosely. She pauses for a moment to just stare at him. “Please?” he whispers. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Sure.” she whispers back, motioning him to follow her to the porch steps. They sit and just stare out to the front lawn, the sounds of driving cars and chirping crickets in the distance. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m sorry, Rey. Like really fucking sorry. I shouldn’t have projected my bullshit on you. You must’ve already been under a lot of stress about your car and I just made it worse...” he pauses when he feels her hand on top of his. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re right...you <em> did </em> make it worse.” she responds with a quiet chuckle. He lets out a dry laugh, shaking his head at the fact that even when they’re fighting she can always crack a joke. “I just don’t understand where it all came from. I mean you don’t have to tell me the details but when you saw your dad, I just felt you turn into another person…” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He sighs. “My dad and I...did not have a great relationship growing up. He wasn’t violent or abusive or anything but he was just...never around. He used to race cars and gamble and shit like that so I wouldn’t see him for days on end. Mom would always be worried that he’d get stabbed or shot or not even come back at all. I always resented him for making her feel that way, that she was basically taking care of two kids. My dad fell into it with the wrong crowd and really almost had shit hit the fan. He finally got his act together, got a respectable job and was trying to be a good family man. Turns out it was too late, I was already 17 and when I needed him to be a father he wasn’t around. When I needed him to teach me how to tie a tie, or how to ask a girl out or what the hell taxes are...I had to figure all that myself. So for him to try to insert himself back into my life that late caused us to fight <em>a lot</em>. As soon as I turned 18 I moved out and tried to be my own man, go to college, make something of myself in the world.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, Ben…” she whispers softly, leaning into his shoulder. A rogue tear escapes the corner of her eye. She expected something but not to this extent, not this level of pain and hurt from such a young age. It completely explains his harsh exterior, his protective behavior, and all the anger issues. It’s not an excuse, but it’s a reason. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I still try to make an effort for Mom. Go home for Thanksgiving or Christmas once in a while. That’s why I was acting the way I was when you told me you were there. I didn’t give myself any time to prepare like I usually do, so I went in with all that anger and trauma...you don’t deserve that. You don’t deserve me.” They’re both silent for a few minutes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, you did warn me that you were no...what word did you use...<em> picnic </em> ?” she smirks, softly nudging his shoulder. He can’t help but laugh at that, squeezing her hand momentarily. “I can’t say I didn’t act the same way after I lost my mom. Lashing out, completely isolating myself. Always just so <em> angry </em> with the world.” She’s gritting her teeth now, trying not to cry.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can I ask?” He asks nervously. She nods, looking down at her lap. “How did you lose her?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“She was a kindergarten teacher, the literal embodiment of sunshine. She loved her job, gave her life to those kids to make them happy and see the good in the world. She always created these fun traditions for us growing up, like Pancake Sunday.” He smiles fondly at her, gripping her hand. “She was coming home from her classes’ spring recital 5 years ago, none of us could make it that night…” she pauses to swallow the lump in her throat “and she got hit by a drunk driver. 90 miles an hour in a residential, can you fucking believe that? That fucking bastard <em> lived </em>...while my mom was dead on arrival.” She’s full on sobbing now, Ben’s grip around her airtight as he leans his head on top of hers. The sounds of her muffled cries are all that's between them as they sit together on the stairs of the porch, the sun completely setting in the distance. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They didn’t expect the conversation to go this way, revealing their most traumatic life experiences in each other’s arms on her front porch. But it feels right. Saying what’s been bottled up for so long, kept in the back of their minds eating away at their sanity. Holding them back from the ability to love and be vulnerable, not just with other people…but with themselves. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/5k2bLEw">
    
  </a>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I swear it took me all of 30 seconds to realize how much of an idiot I was. I turned back around to come try to get you, but you were gone!” Ben laughs, earning a soft shove from Rey. They’re still sitting on her porch as it turns nightfall, the lampposts starting to flicker on as they talk.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s what I get for trying to take the scenic route.” she retorts. They’ve finally passed the overly-emotional traumatic storytelling portion of their night and things seem to be back to normal for now. There’s a new level of comfort between them that probably comes with knowing their innermost secrets that neither one of them seem to mind. “Hey, do you want to come inside for a bit? Kay ordered pizza since Dad’s not home.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You promise I won’t get tased on sight by some secret Boy Detector your dad has installed?” He raises his eyebrow and Rey has to clasp her hand over her mouth to stifle the snort of laughter that escapes her. She stands up and reaches her hand out to him. He takes a moment to pause and look up at her, cocking his head to one side.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t look at me like that…” she mumbles with a shy smirk. She feels warm under his gaze, he looks at her like she’s the only girl in the world and it’s something she’s just not used to yet. But maybe she can learn.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” he quips, returning a devilish smirk as he takes her hand and stands up. “Just admiring the view.” Ben wraps an arm around her waist and plants a soft kiss to her lips, humming in approval. It should be a quick kiss but they both let it linger for a moment longer, relishing in the connected feeling. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The distant sound of the TV fills the space as soon as Ben and Rey walk in the house. They can see the back of Kaydel’s head as she watches some obnoxious reality show.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s about time! I was about to--” Kaydel says as she turns around, cutting herself off when she realizes that her sister is not alone. Ben awkwardly smiles with a wave, trying not to stare at the pimple cream Kay has dotted on her face. “Oh shit. Uh, hi.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Kay, this is Ben. Ben, this is my sister Kay.” Rey quickly realizes that this is the first time they’re officially meeting, their previous interactions just seeing each other across the room at Wexley’s party and in the halls on campus.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nice to meet you.” Ben states with a smile, putting his hand up in a casual salute.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nice to meet you too. There’s pizza in the kitchen if you want any.” Kay says, still slightly dumbfounded that there’s a six-foot-something guy in a leather jacket in the living room holding her sisters hand. He nods in acknowledgment, taking the lead to walk into the kitchen. Rey and Kaydel share a brief glance at each other, Kaydel silently mouthing </span>
  <em>
    <span>holy shit what the fuck Rey </span>
  </em>
  <span>in astonishment, earning a warning glare from her older sister. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So that’s the infamous Kaydel.” he jokes once they’re out of earshot, wasting no time to grab a slice of pizza. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“In the flesh…” she replies sarcastically. She stuffs her face with a slice, unable to care about etiquette and manners around Ben. She doesn’t feel the need to impress him, for some reason he’s still around after learning what he knows about her so what difference will table manners make? </span>
  <span>They sit next to each other at the island counter and eat in silence, the background noise of the TV filling the space. They each scarf down two slices of pizza in record time; apparently discussing childhood trauma really works up your appetite.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This might be a really weird question but...can I see your room?” Ben asks, shifting awkwardly in his chair.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hmmm...maybe. Why?” She’s slightly surprised at the question but more curious to hear his answer. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know." he shrugs. "I feel like you learn a lot about someone by their room. Plus you’ve already been in mine, so it’s only fair.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So you’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>still</span>
  </em>
  <span> trying to get to know me?” she smirks with a raised brow.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben smirks back, bringing his face closer to hers. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>succeeding</span>
  </em>
  <span> at it.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh huh, sure.” She rolls her eyes with a scoff. “Okay fine, but don’t expect similar events that have happened in your room to happen in mine.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I would never </span>
  <em>
    <span>dream</span>
  </em>
  <span> of it.</span>
  <span>” he jokes sarcastically, his voice deep and husky in her ear. She shoves him playfully, earning her a quick kiss on the temple.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey quietly leads him upstairs, not that she expects Kaydel to snitch or that they’re even going to do anything, but you can never be too careful. She opens the door to reveal her modestly sized room equipped with a full sized bed with fairy lights lining the headboard, her desk littered with papers, and her Polaroid collage wall. She stands in the doorway, letting him roam freely to take it all in. There’s something intriguing about letting him see yet another intimate side of her that no one else has before. He spends the most time on her Polaroid wall carefully admiring each photo. She walks up to him, leaning against the wall trying not to block the photos as he continues to scan them.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This is so fucking cool…” he breathes. She feels a wave of tingling warmth across her whole body, truly feeling his appreciation for her work. “You gotta do something with this, this has to be your future.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Funny you mention it...I have my second interview with the Coruscant Global Photography Program in a few weeks.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re kidding! Holy shit Rey, you’re gonna get it for sure. They’d be idiots not to hire you.” He’s beaming down at her, his excitement for her palpable as he softly grips her shoulders. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Huh yeah sure...I’m trying to not get my hopes up. It would be a miracle if they took some nobody like me.” she scoffs. He whips his head around to look at her, the intensity of his stare sending a shiver down her spine. He’s quick to close the space between them as he softly grips her shoulders.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t ever make anyone think you don’t deserve what you want. You hear me, Rey? Not even yourself.” His voice is a lot more stern now, almost reprimanding.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She’s very rarely been rendered speechless, but this is one of those times. She doesn’t know what to say anything to that, so she cups his face with her hands and pulls him down to kiss her. His hands instantly gravitate to her hips, returning the kiss unhurried. She slowly walks him back to the edge of her bed, softly pushing him down onto the mattress as she crawls on top of his lap. This sudden rush of bravery has her trailing her kisses down his skin, sucking particularly long on a spot at the base of his throat.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Rey...I thought you said you weren’t trying to recreate what’s happened in my room.” he lets out a breathy laugh, a low moan escaping his lips when she begins rocking against his lap. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re my guest, I’m just being hospitable.” she smirks against his skin, soothing the bruise with her tongue. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Something must’ve clicked in his head after being fogged with lust, because he’s quickly sitting up to meet her eyes with her still straddling his hips. She gasps at the sudden motion but doesn’t make any move to stop her ministrations.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re going to get me in trouble. In case you didn’t know, I’m trying to get in your Dad’s good graces.” He cups her face, gently pulling her up to meet his eyes. “Wouldn’t want to ruin that now, would we?” He’s looking at her with such a mix of adoration and lust, it’s a dizzying combination.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm, I guess your reputation as a bad boy isn’t all it's cracked up to be.” she teases, hoping it’ll rile him up to continue. He quirks an eyebrow, shaking his head with a soft laugh. “Ugh fine, you’re such a spoil sport.” she scoffs, giving him one last kiss before hopping off his lap. She continues to stand in front of him, admiring the multicolored brand she’s marked him with. “Let me cover that up for you.” She saunters over to her desk to pull out a tube of concealer and a compact of translucent powder. “Do you mind grabbing the moisturizer I have in my bedside drawer?” she asks absentmindedly. She hears the drawer squeak open, the movement of shuffling items before a deep gasp escapes Ben’s lips. She quickly turns around and almost instantly wants the ground to swallow her up.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, well, well...what do we have here?” he teases coyly, pulling out a small purple vibrator from that godforsaken drawer. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she completely forgot it was in there! She quickly runs over to try to get it out of his hands, but his agility and six foot wingspan quickly keeps it out of her reach.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ben, <em>c’mon</em>! Seriously, give it back!” she gripes, climbing over him as he extends himself further and further back. He can’t stop laughing as her lithe body fails to retrieve the toy from his hands, continuing to wave it around like a fireworks sparkler. This goes on for a few minutes as she practically chases him around the bed, covering her face and groaning in annoyance when he thinks it's even funnier to turn it on and let the soft buzzing sound fill the room. He eventually has his fill of tormenting her, sitting back down and returning the toy to its rightful home in the drawer.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Who knew you were such a little freak? I love it.” he pants, out of breath from his laughing and diversion techniques. She slaps him across the shoulder, her face reaching maximum redness.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re the worst.” she pouts. “And I'm definitely not covering that for you now.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He pulls her by the waist until her body is flush against his. As he sits and she stands they’re practically at eye level, the erratic beating of their hearts pounding against each other. She’s melting at the pure heat between them, trying to think of anything besides wanting to tear his clothes off right then and there. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Who says I want to?” he whispers huskily, placing a soft kiss to her cheek. “I’ll wear it proudly.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually the steam dissipates between them and she’s practically shoving him out the front door before she has the chance to make any rash decisions under her father’s roof. They walk down the porch and front yard until they reach his car, his hand tightly gripping her slightly clammy ones. He spins her around, pressing her back against the passenger side door as he ravishes her lips one last time before he leaves. She can’t help but moan softly into the kiss, their combined libido completely heightened by the events of the day. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Promise you’ll think of me when you use it tonight?” he whispers huskily against the shell of her ear. The vibration of his words sends a wave of wetness between her thighs, and suddenly she's sweating like a sinner in church. She hates that she most definitely will, but refuses to give him the satisfaction of knowing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Goodnight Ben.” she mutters, using every inch of willpower to tear herself away from him. He eventually pulls away, chuckling to himself as he walks over to the driver's side.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He <em>hates</em> this feeling. His foot taps nervously against the linoleum of the corridor as he waits. Why does he keep doing this? Why hasn’t he put an end to this bullshit? He doesn’t get more time to mull it over before the person (or should he say gremlin) he’s meeting appears before him in a grey long sleeve and jeans. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Let’s make this quick, Solo. I got a hot date.” Poe Dameron huffs with a smirk, pulling out his wallet to fumble with a handful of crisp bills.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Dameron, wait. I want out.” Ben states firmly, trying to stop him from taking the money out. Poe looks up at him slightly perplexed before letting out a breathy laugh. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn Solo. Don’t tell me the bitch finally scared you away. Listen, I know she’s a piece of work--”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut it, asshole. I don’t want to be part of your little game anymore.” What started off as a harmless interaction after Wexley’s party has gone way out of hand. A drunk agreement to take Rey out in exchange for a hundred bucks seemed like a good idea at the time; he didn’t know anything about her then and he could really use the money. Poe saw the cost-benefit analysis of continuing to give him money in exchange for taking Rey out so it became a bimonthly affair. Poe somehow knew of Dr. Kenobi’s medieval rules and used it to his advantage; he obviously didn’t care about throwing his family’s abundance of money if it meant finally claiming the younger Kenobi girl who captivated the campus. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But Ben didn’t expect what transpired, to actually start falling for the girl who was a little rough around the edges and drove him insane. She was crude and snarky and secretive but she was also beautiful and funny and unlike anyone he’s ever met. Ben has tried to stop several times, to get Dameron to end this little game, but he’s failed every time. Some weak part of him thinks he can have his cake and eat it too, to take the money but also keep Rey in his life. Every time he would get cut off by Poe saying something stupid and the money was quickly shoved in his hands. It was a terribly selfish thing to do...but then again he never claimed to be a good person.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh okay, I see how it is…” he smirks again with a nod, shuffling through his wallet again. “I think </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> should cover it?” He’s now holding $400 in between his fingers, looking up at Ben with a devilish grin. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck. </span>
  </em>
  <span>$400 can do a lot for him right now; hell, he might even be able to buy Rey something nice. Anything to ease his conscience, right? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben huffs in annoyance, quickly snatching the money and stuffing it into his pocket while carefully making sure no one can see the exchange. Take the money now, figure out how to </span>
  <em>
    <span>stop</span>
  </em>
  <span> taking the money later. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hope you guys are loving the story so far! I love reading all you're lovely comments, they make me smile like a big ole dork 😇</p>
<p>if you like my work, feel free to check out some of my other stories on here in between updates! enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/FskuYMv">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you sure you guys don’t want to go with us to the Halloween party?” Rose asks, smoothing out her Catwoman costume in the mirror of Ben, Hux and Finn’s apartment. Rey and Ben are lying lazily on the couch in the living room as Finn and Hux pretended to battle each other in their respective Captain America and Batman costumes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Kappa Sigma Phi’s Annual Spooktacular Soiree is one of the hottest parties of the year!” Finn points out with a chuckle, blocking one of Hux’s punch attempts with his plastic shield. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ugh, more like Nightmare on Frat Street…” Rey scoffs, stuffing a handful of potato chips in her mouth. It isn’t like she hates Halloween, she just hates the idea of being stuck in a frat house with drunk college kids in barely-there ‘sexy’ costumes making a fool of themselves. When Ben had suggested they just stay in for the night and watch Hocus Pocus (or maybe not watch it <em> completely</em>) she was totally on board. Ever since Hux finally admitted his secret admirer thing and became Rose’s boyfriend, the two had practically been inseparable and nauseating. It was funny how polar opposite of a couple they were to Rey and Ben (a couple who’s <em> not a couple</em>, by the way<em>) </em>, but they were happy that the two had finally stopped dancing around their feelings and made it official.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Have fun you crazy kids!” Ben shouts with a deep laugh as the superhero trio finally make their way out the door. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The night is spent with a mix of watching Hocus Pocus, feeding each other snacks and languidly making out on the couch. Rey enjoys the slow leisurely pace of kissing him with no pressure to have to go any further; the way his tongue massages hers as their lips slide past each other like they have all the time in the world. She relishes in the soft moans she evokes out of him, the feeling of his warm hand on her thigh that isn’t eager to move from its spot. They have an unspoken agreement that tonight doesn’t need to have any frenzied lustful activities, that they could just enjoy the feeling of being in each other's company. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They don’t know how much time passes by before Ben’s phone begins to ring. He either doesn’t seem to hear it or doesn’t care to part from her. “Aren’t you gonna answer that?” she mutters against his lips. He groans when the ringing continues to fill the room, softly pushing himself off her to reach it from the coffee table.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My mother…” he grumbles, running a hand through his hair. Rey recalls him having a relatively good relationship with her, so she’s not sure what he’s fussed about.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Answer it. I’ll still be here.” she coaxes, pressing a swift kiss to his cheek as he puts the phone to his ear. She leans back into the couch, absentmindedly returning her attention to the movie that neither of them have been paying attention to.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi mom…yeah…no, I’m not going out tonight...it’s none of your business who I’m with...”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey can’t help but giggle at his slight annoyance. She sits back up and begins pressing soft feathered kisses to his neck in a devious plot to distract him. He instantly tenses under her, his breath starting to labor slightly as she focuses on a particular spot under his ear. She feels particularly proud of her ministrations when he gasps, momentarily fumbling with the phone in his ear and having to assure his mother that everything’s fine. She smirks against his skin, but is momentarily caught off guard when the large hand that was on her thigh comes up to tickle her waist. She yelps in surprise, instantly clapping her hand over her mouth with wide eyes at the realization that his mother <em> definitely </em> heard that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No! Mom...that’s…” His eyes are wide and full of warning as he looks back at her, reeling from the damage control he’s going to have to do now that his mother’s voice has raised in excited concern. She flashes him a look of <em> hey you started it </em> before sticking out her tongue at him. “Mom, I...ugh fine, her name is Rey and that’s the only information you’ll get out of me...ok, ok I’ll ask her...I’ll call you tomorrow...love you too...bye.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oopsie…” she smirks with a shrug of her shoulders. He shakes his head and laughs, tossing his phone over to the other side of the couch as he climbs over to pin her back against the cushions.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, well now my mother’s inviting you out to lunch so looks like I’m not the one who lost here.” he smirks, diving in to catch her lips in his. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What?” she mutters, instantly pulling her lips away from his. He wants her to meet his mother? “I don’t know about that...I’m not good with parents.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well my dad already likes you so it won’t take much convincing for her either.” he chuckles. He can see the look of apprehension in her eyes, so he comes down to rest his head on her chest as he takes her hand in his. “Look, it doesn’t have to be a big scary thing. I know she'll like you. You don’t have to give me an answer now, just think about it. Okay?” His voice is soft and nurturing, and it fills her chest with unexplainable warmth. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay, I’ll think about it.” she says, gently carding her fingers through his thick hair. He hums in content, placing a quick kiss to the covered valley between her breasts. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Good. Now where were we…” he says slowly before reaching up to rapidly tickle her sides again. She shrieks in delight as he continues his tickles, his large frame holding her down from thrashing against him. She shouts his name in between breathy laughs, pleading him to stop as tears of joy trickle down her face. He bends down to kiss them off her cheeks before slowing his attack down to kiss her, an invariable smirk on both of their lips.</p>
<p> </p><ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Her heart is beating like a sledgehammer as she sits in front of her computer, staring into the tiny webcam instead of trying to focus on the fear she can see on the screen. Her second interview for Coruscant’s Global Photography Program. She’s spent the last two day scared shitless, barely able to talk about anything else but making sure her portfolio is <em> flawless</em>. She had sent them an updated version earlier this afternoon before her interview to give them time to review it, and now her mind’s on autopilot as she answers her interviewers questions. Ms. Ahsoka Tano, Senior Director of the CGPP is virtually sitting in front of her and looking over her work. She seems kind with the right amount of professionalism that doesn’t make you want to shit your pants but definitely let you know she means business. It’s been an amicable conversation, Rey’s nerves slowly starting to settle more as they talk. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I must say, Ms. Kenobi...your creative perspective is profound.” Ahsoka remarks, continuing to glance over her portfolio from what looks like an illustrious and well organized office. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you, ma’am. I just see what I see.” she shrugs with a pensive smile. <em> Stupid, why would you say it like that? </em>She mentally kicks herself for not having more professional decorum.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That you do. Well, as you know we have hundreds of applicants for the program so it will take us a lot of time to narrow it down to the final interview. We’re shooting for the beginning of December, do you think that would be okay?” she asks, organizing the stack of papers in front of her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh yes, of course. I’m a very patient person. I plan to work on some more pieces throughout the holidays as well.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ahsoka nods, looking down at her desk as if in thought. “That’s good. But make sure you also just go out there and enjoy your life, Ms. Kenobi. Don’t want to be living it all behind a lens.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“With all due respect, Ms. Tano. This kind of is my life.” Rey states softly, not intending for it to sound as meager as it does. Ahsoka looks up from her desk, nodding at her with a sense of calm understanding that puts Rey back at ease.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They soon end the call, Rey thanking Ms. Tano for her time and looking forward to hearing from her soon. She quickly shuts her laptop and lets out a staggered breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. Rey pushes back from her chair only to immediately flop onto her bed, grabbing her phone from the nightstand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Hey, how’d it go?</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: I feel good about it. She was really nice, we had a good conversation.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: You’re going to get it. I just know you are.</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Rey: I don’t remember hiring a 6 foot-something cheerleader lol</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Too bad, Kenobi. You’re stuck with me and my pom poms ;)</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She lets out a breathy scoff, smiling to herself. How the hell did she end up with a guy like Ben in her life? She obviously expected the brooding, snarky remarks and the sex appeal but never expected him to be so caring, gentle and supportive. Rey has unfortunately drawn very unlucky hands in the past when it came to men, but every time she thinks she’s doing something that will push Ben away he only gets closer. It’s a strange feeling to feel wanted, to not be judged for who you are, having someone who can put up with your bullshit <em> and </em> dish it back just the same. And don’t even get her started on the physical chemistry--<em>oh, if lips could kill </em>. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She’s been trying so hard not to fall for him these past few months, doing everything in her power to keep herself from getting hurt but it’s getting harder and harder. They talk almost every day, they’ve been to each other’s houses, met each other’s parents (Rey is still dreading the fact that she agreed to lunch with his mom tomorrow), and done all sorts of <em> intimate </em>things, and yet he’s never pressured her to put a label on it or do something she’s not comfortable with. It’s refreshing but also incredibly scary at the same time, she’s heading down an unknown path and she has no idea what the fuck to do. </p>
<p><br/>
Rey’s thoughts are interrupted by a soft knock at the door. Dr. Kenobi walks in pensively with a soft smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“How did it go?” he asks, leaning into the doorway. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She sits up from her starfish position on the bed and shrugs. “It seemed like it was good. I won’t know if I got the final interview until December.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, that’s good honey. I’m sure it will all go well.” He nods. The old Rey would begin to argue with him about how he doesn’t even want her to get the position because it will mean moving halfway across the country, but she just doesn’t have that kind of energy anymore. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Dad, can I ask you something?” Rey asks gingerly. She’s never been one to ask her father advice but given the mood she’s in it couldn’t hurt to start now. He seems equally surprised that she’s asking him, but nods as he takes a seat on the edge of her bed. “When you and Mom were dating...when did you know that you--” she cuts herself off, almost unable to say the words she can’t help but think about every day.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her dad lets out a sharp exhale from his nose, chuckling to himself softly. “Well, a part of me always knew. Almost as if the first time I met her my entire future flashed before my eyes. That was the hopeless romantic in me.” Rey huffs in laughter at his remark, “But I think I started to really fall hard when I began to see the more vulnerable side of her. Even when she was this super positive bubbly personality, it was when she felt comfortable enough talking to me about her struggles was when I felt our connection grow stronger. In turn, I started sharing my feelings with her too. It set a great foundation for the future I had always known I wanted with her.” She ponders her father’s words for a moment, even relishing in the minor details about her mom that she didn’t yet know. “When the time comes, you’ll know.” He states softly, patting her knee as he flashes her a sympathetic smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thanks, Dad.” she smiles. This was probably the most civil adult conversation they’ve probably ever had, and she refuses to ruin the moment with any of her typical snarky comments. “I miss her.” she whispers, her voice cracking slightly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He sighs, pulling her close to rest her head on his shoulder. “I miss her too.” They enjoy the comforting silence for a few moments before he continues. “You know, I wasn’t sure at first but I’ve actually come to like this guy. He’s polite and friendly and clearly thinks the world of you. I think Mom would’ve liked him too. I can see how happy you make each other.” Rey softly leans her head onto her father's shoulder, nodding with a timid smile. “Unlike that knob-end that Kaydel can’t stop bringing around…”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey practically snorts at her father’s impetuous remark. They share a strong laugh between them, Rey practically delighted that he shares her same sentiments about that vapid department store mannequin. For the first time in a long time, almost every aspect of her life seems to be falling into place. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi friends! hope you guys are enjoying the story so far, please let me know your thoughts! as you may have noticed, we officially have an end chapter count! there's still some time before the eventual angst of the story, so I hope you guys continue to enjoy the good times before that happens.</p>
<p>I also just posted a new mini fic, that's where you take me, that's about single dad Ben asking his daughter's nanny Rey to live with them during quarantine. it's cute domestic fluff (with some eventual smut on the way), so if that's your jam please check it out! you can also browse my other work in between updates ♥️</p>
<p>until next time!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/dJho8qa">
    
  </a>
</p>
<p>Rey thrashes around her closet, desperate to find something that will be ‘meeting Ben’s mom appropriate’. She tried to enlist Rose to come over and help but of course she was out on a date with Hux and could only just send her pictures for her approval. After about 9 different outfit options she settles on an oversized cream sweater tucked into a black floral corduroy skirt; it was the most preppy outfit she could throw together from her own wardrobe without having to go into Kaydel’s. God, why is she so nervous? Ben assured her this would be nothing more than a casual lunch with him and his mother but she can’t help but think of all the ways this could go wrong, she could say the wrong thing or his mom could hate her right off the top or she could accidentally…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She’s taken out of her thoughts when she gets the text that Ben is outside, and she grabs her small black bag and runs down the stairs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Everything is going to be alright, Rey.” her father pipes up as he turns the corner to meet her at the bottom of the stairs. Is her father really giving her encouragement before going out with a guy? She’s seriously entered the Twilight Zone. She gives him a nod of understanding as she bursts out the front door to the car. Ben is waving to her father from the driver's seat and it still makes her heart flutter that they have a relatively good relationship; if Ben can put up with and get along with the archaic ways of her father surely his mother couldn’t be much worse.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi. You look beautiful.” Ben states after she’s hops into the passenger seat and straps herself in. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I look nervous.” she remarks with a weary huff of laughter. He can’t help but laugh in return, driving off towards the restaurant to meet his mother.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>They arrive at Takodana, an upscale restaurant in downtown Corellia. Rey has never had a reason to be at a place that has more than a ‘$$’ rating on Yelp, so she’s instantly intimidated by the whole thing. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I promise this place isn’t as fancy as it looks. I was ordering chicken tenders from here until I was 16.” Ben jokes in an attempt to ease her as they park the car. She laughs softly, turning to face him when he shuts off the engine. He immediately leans his head forward to catch her lips in his, slowly calming her speeding nerves. She’s thankful she only opted for a lip tint instead of lipstick because he would undoubtedly be ruining it right now. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They eventually enter the doors of the restaurant and are greeted by the maitre d' who escorts them to a small circular table by the window already being occupied by a short elegant woman. Rey can see the woman’s dark silver and brown hair plaited into an intricately braided bun, the sheen of her black silk blouse reflecting through the natural light of the window. She puts down her wine glass when she sees them approaching, standing up to greet them with a smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben, there you are! I swear you’re getting taller every time I see you.” His mother’s voice is smooth and raspy at the same time as she goes up to hug her son.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s just you getting smaller.” he jokes back, embracing the woman who is at least a foot shorter than him. “Mom, this is Rey. Rey, this is mother.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi, Mrs. Solo. It’s really nice to meet you.” Rey smiles pensively, reaching out her hand to shake.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh please sweetheart, call me Leia. Aren’t you the prettiest little thing!” Leia gushes, taking Rey’s hand while also enveloping it with her other. Leia gestures to them to take a seat at the round table, Ben taking the seat that puts him back against the window so Rey and Leia can get a good view of the light. “I swear, Ben, when your father told me that he had met your girlfriend I thought it was April Fool’s Day!” she laughs. Ben momentarily winces and Rey is unsure if it’s at the mention of his father or that Leia called Rey his girlfriend.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Mom</em>, I thought I told you--” he says with a warning smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, shoot! You’re right sweetheart. <em> Not your girlfriend</em>. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable, dear.” Leia says, turning to Rey. Rey smiles and shakes her head, politely telling her it’s okay. “I completely get it, when Han and I met we practically danced around each other for months. We were both terribly stubborn, him more than me of course.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The waiter comes by to take their drink orders. Ben and Rey settle on some water with lemon as Leia politely requests a refill on her Sauvignon blanc. They all decide to review the menu in silence for a few moments, Rey uncertain about what to order. There aren’t even prices next to the items which can only mean that this place is expensive as fuck; she bites her lower lip nervously as she deciphers the most appropriate thing to order. She sneaks a glance over her menu at Ben, who is staring back at her over his menu flashing a quick wink. And boy oh boy, if she didn’t already need that water. The waiter comes back in a few minutes with their respective beverages, ready to take their meal order.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll take the avocado caprese salad.” Leia reports kindly, handing her menu to the waiter.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll do the chicken cordon bleu.” Ben states with a curt nod. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The mushroom florentine, please.” Rey pipes up quietly, handing her menu back to the waiter. The waiter nods solemnly, quickly disappearing from the table. Rey takes a sip of her water, hoping it will calm her dry mouth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So Rey, how are your classes? What’s your major?” Leia asks, swirling her wine in it’s glass.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Photography, ma’am. And I really enjoy my classes, thankfully I don’t have too many this semester.” she smiles politely, making sure she registers her answer in her brain before letting it leave her mouth. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey is actually applying for the Coruscant Global Photography Program,” Ben pipes up, tilting his chin up quickly at Rey “she’s done some amazing work.” Her cheeks flush at his words, shyly looking down at her silverware.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Wow, a very prestigious program indeed. I have faith in you, my dear. I hope to see your work one of these days.” Leia smiles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I would love that.” Rey beams up at the older woman with a nod.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>The rest of the lunch goes off without a hitch, the three of them indulging in their meals and stories. Leia shares sweet and slightly embarrassing stories of Ben in his youth, earning groans and blushes out of him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, but you were so cute when you wrote that love letter! Did I tell you that he had a full blown calligraphy set--” Leia boasts with a laugh. Ben shoots her a warning glare.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Please, tell me more!” Rey laughs, smirking gleefully over at Ben’s mortification.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why did I have a feeling that you two would conspire against me today?” Ben groans, shaking his head. They all laugh together, Leia holding up her glass to clink against Rey’s with a mischievous grin. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Their lunch begins to wind down, the conversation growing more and more comfortable. Ben excuses himself momentarily to use the restroom, kissing Rey’s cheek and begging his mother not to say anything embarrassing while he’s gone. It’s just the two of them now, Rey nervously clearing her throat as she takes a sip of water. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You should be very proud of him.” Rey says softly, her eyes looking up to meet Leia’s soft brown ones.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I am. He had a very...difficult childhood. But I can tell he’s working on it. Trying to be a better man. I’d like to think that having you in his life has helped with that.” Leia remarks. Rey blushes, looking down at her lap unable to respond. “Look, I know that you both are <em> taking it slow</em>, I totally get that. Being in love is scary--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I--” Rey cuts in, almost banging her knee on the table in surprise. <em> Love</em>? “With all due respect Leia, I don’t know if that’s what you could call it yet.” Rey fears that she may have come off too brash, but Leia flashes her a warm smile with a nod.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Maybe so. But I know my son. I’ve seen the way he’s been looking at you today. If we’re speaking woman to woman-- and I do hope you keep this between us for his sake --I’m almost certain that’s how he feels about you.” Rey feels momentarily dizzy at his mother's words...Ben <em> loves her</em>? There’s no way, they’ve only known each other for a few months-- kriff, she’s not even technically his girlfriend. She doesn’t get much time to ask more before he returns to the table with a pensive smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Mom, please don’t tell me you are trying to scare her away.” he remarks, flashing a wink and a smirk at Rey that sends electric pulses down her spine.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well actually Benjamin, I was just about to pull up some old baby photos I found!” Leia jeers, pulling out her phone and swiping the screen. Ben groans as he presses his palms against his eye sockets, Rey laughing amusingly.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>The drive home is relatively quiet. Rey can’t stop biting the nail on her middle finger, bouncing her knee with nervous energy. She hasn’t been able to stop thinking about Leia’s words, about the possibility that Ben <em> loves </em>her. A part of her should just brush it off, pretend that it’s his mom just playing matchmaker...but the very real part of her knows how close he is with her and the kind of mother-son connection they have. She wouldn’t say it if she didn’t think it was even a little bit true. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The L word is a very scary word, a word she does not take lightly, nor a word she’s ever felt about someone that didn’t already share her last name (excluding Rose). She doesn’t even want to attempt to open the mental can of worms on whether that...<em>feeling</em>...is reciprocated. This is just too much to think about, especially sitting next to him in his car.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My mom really likes you.” he states smoothly, pulling up to her driveway. His deep voice instantly snaps her out of her thoughts but makes her all the more nervous to talk.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, she was really nice. I...had a good time.” she responds timidly. Rey turns to look at Ben, his body practically shifting her direction. She can see a glint in his eyes that she desperately wants to blame on the reflection of the sidewalk lamp post. Has he always been looking at her like that? I guess that’s how this whole thing started, the intensity of his stare like a magnet drawing her in.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So did I…” he whispers, slowly leaning over the center console. His gaze flicks to her lips and she doesn’t have any time to think before they’re pressed against his. Every nerve in her body is vibrating, suddenly overtaken with feelings she can’t explain. The warm plush lips that normally bring her so much comfort and pleasure suddenly have a proverbial black cloud hanging over them. He attempts to slide his tongue across her bottom lip but she’s so frozen she can’t think to reciprocate. Ben must notice this because he leans his head back to stare at her intently, brows slightly furrowed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You okay?” His hand reaches over to rest comfortably on the knee that thankfully isn’t bouncing anymore, the contact practically burning her skin. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, uh...I’m fine. Just got a lot on my mind.” she stammers. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh. Do you want to talk about it?” he asks softly. <em> Do I want to talk about the fact that you might be in love with me and the thought scares me halfway to Mars? I don’t fucking think so.  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, no. It’s okay. I’m just gonna go…” she shifts in her seat as she unbuckles her seat belt. He quickly grabs her hand, the touch freezing her in place as her other hand reaches the passenger door.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey…” he says quietly, lightly squeezing her hand under his warm grip. She turns to look at him discreetly, her wide eyes meeting his soft brown ones. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She nods quickly, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek and averting her eyes down as she opens the door. His hand simultaneously releases hers as she steps out and closes the door behind her. She can feel him staring as she walks up the driveway, promptly turning around to wave goodbye as soon as she reaches the porch. A ragged sigh escapes her lungs as soon as his car is out of view, her head and heart filled with conflicting thoughts.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hiiiiiii, please enjoy two chapters this week since I have writers block on my other wips 😊💕</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/DDIKPQ0">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the hell is Friendsgiving?” Rey blurts out. Rose is sitting opposite her at one of the tables in the courtyard as they share a bagel. Rose’s class got canceled so she’s keeping Rey company between Feminist Theory and Psych.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, you’ve never heard of Friendsgiving? It’s basically a bunch of friends getting together and having Thanksgiving dinner together instead of with their families. Surely the name gave it away?” Rose chides playfully.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I mean I get <em> that</em>. But why would I do it? In case you haven’t noticed I haven’t exactly warranted many friends that can survive me long enough to want to spend a holiday with me.” Rey groans.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Until now! Hux and I were talking about doing it at his place so it would be me and you, Hux, Ben, Finn, maybe some of their friends if they have any--” Rose begins to ramble excitedly at the prospect but Rey’s mind tunes out when the frequency gets too chipper for her taste. Thanksgiving break is next week and she didn’t really have any plans to consider until now. But now there’s a chance not just to actually do something on the day, but to do it with Ben.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The days following Ben and Rey’s lunch with his mother were slightly awkward, Rey giving herself some distance from him as she processed the possibilities of his mother’s claim. She took longer to respond to his texts and made excuses against hanging out with him that weekend; if he noticed anything off about her he didn’t say, just stayed consistently at an acceptable distance. She eventually managed to push it away at the back of her mind and warm up to him again, making an effort to try not to bring up anything too personal or emotional between them. Keeping their relationship with surface level conversations and mind-blowing physical intimacy was the safest way to keep Rey’s heart protected from anything getting too serious.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hello! Earth to Rey?” Rose states, waving her hand over Rey’s face. She instantly comes out of her thoughts, nodding quickly to her friend's concerned expression. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ugh...fine I’ll go.” Rey mutters with a sigh. Rose cheers excitedly, clapping her hands together in finality. Rose continues to drone on about a potluck sign up sheet when a tall figure in the distance catches her eye. It’s almost like he’s walking in slow motion in her mind as he makes his way towards their table, donning a classic black t-shirt and alluring smirk. His eyes never leave hers as he makes his way towards their table, a breath hitched in her throat as he finally takes the seat next to her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“How’s it going, ladies?” Ben asks pleasantly as his hand goes to rest softly on Rey’s thigh. Even through her jeans she can feel its warmth, and on a chilly November day it’s much appreciated.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just talking about Friendsgiving plans!” Rose smiles. Ben scoffs softly, earning a look from both girls. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, I mean it’s fine!” he remarks, playfully putting his hands up in innocence. “Definitely a better plan than spending it with my folks and watching my dad try to set the house on fire deep frying a turkey.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“God, you two really are two peas in a cranky pants pod.” Rose laughs with an eye roll. Rey jokingly slaps her across the shoulder as Ben laughs. “Alright, well I’ll leave you two curmudgeon’s to plot how you plan to terrorize the spirit committee or whatever you guys do for fun.” She begins to leave the table, rolling her eyes again as Ben and Rey coo sarcastic goodbyes to her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As soon as Rose is out of sight, Ben slowly loses himself in her hair as he nudges his lips in the crook of her neck. She’s taken slightly off guard at his advances, allowing him to trace slow kisses down the column of her throat as she shudders under his touch.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Not here…” she says a little more breathlessly than she anticipated. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“If you expect me to walk all the way to that damn brick wall on the other side of campus…” he mutters. Rey lets out a short exhale out her nose. She can feel him smirk against her skin as he sucks lightly on a particular spot. She wants so badly to just let her eyes flutter close and lean her head back to give him more access, but the idea of being on display in the center of campus shuts that right out of her mind. These imbeciles don’t deserve to witness her like this, it’s only reserved for him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So about this Friendsgiving thing…” she states, trying to change the subject. He huffs softly against her skin, giving it one last kiss before his face comes up to meet hers. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What? Do you have family plans? Because if you do it’s totally okay--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No it’s not that. We usually have family dinner the day before. Dad works Thanksgiving night and Kay stays over at her friends house so they can go Black Friday shopping.” Rey explains.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh. Well if you do come you can always spend the night--” he begins warily. Rey’s eyes go wide and he immediately begins to back track. “Not like that! Nothing has to happen, I promise. You know I would never do that. It’s just that I wouldn’t want you to be home alone--” She cuts off his babble with a quick kiss, momentarily not caring for the potential of onlookers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re cute when you ramble.” she says without thinking. She catches both of them by surprise with her small admission, Ben rarely being on the receiving end of compliments between them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey Kenobi complimenting me? I’ll alert the local news.” his signature smirk is quickly interrupted with a swift elbow to the chest.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Asshole.” she smirks back. He returns the kiss swiftly, cupping the side of her neck with his hand as his lips glide past hers. She should immediately pull away and chastise him for doing this in public...but maybe she’ll allow it just this one time.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“Dude, how do you even know when the turkey’s done?” Finn exclaims, kneeling in front of the oven window. He’s been watching it like a hawk as Hux sets the table and Ben works on side dishes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t know? Just stick it with that thermometer thing.” Hux yells absentmindedly as he places silverware in front of each chair of their dining room table. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Stupid Hux for being pussy-whipped enough to agree to a Friendsgiving dinner at their place. Hosting a dinner for eight people would be stressful enough without one of those eight people being the girl he’s practically falling in love with. <em> Not that he’d ever tell her that. </em> After they had lunch with his mother a few weeks ago he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about her; how her smile lights up an entire room or how she feels pressed up against him or how intriguing she is every time she reveals something new about her life. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>But there’s something in the back of his mind that’s eating away at this happiness, and it’s the fact that he’s still taking the money from Poe. Every time they meet to exchange money it hurts him even more, and every time he’s too much of a bitch to put an end to it. He makes himself a promise that when they meet again after the holiday he will put an end to this, even if it means losing out on the money he really needs to pay rent. This is the most steady income he’s had since he was forced to work in his dad’s shop over the summer. He hates asking his parents for money even though they’ve paid for his education in full. It’s emasculating to rely on people that he’s been trying to distance himself from, thinking that he owes them anything after the hell they put him through growing up. If he could just find another way to make this arrangement work--<em>no</em>, he needs to put an end to this. Figure out another way besides hurting the girl he cares for. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The ringing of the doorbell snaps him out of his reverie, and he watches Hux jog to answer it. Ben continues to whip his mashed potatoes but his eyes don’t leave the door as Rose and Rey enter, each carrying something wrapped in foil as they chat indistinctly with Hux. Rey’s eyes quickly meet his from the distance, her timid smile sending a warm flush across his body. She looks so cute in a simple black shirt, jean skirt and brown oversized coat. Her hair is loosely curled to frame her face with minimal makeup. She’s so naturally beautiful that she could be wearing a trash bag and still look stunning.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey stranger.” she smirks as she enters the kitchen to deposit the foiled tray on the table. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi beautiful.” he responds, earning a blush from her as her eyes quickly dart down. He loves complimenting her because she so clearly doesn’t know how to accept them, he’s hoping that by constantly showering her with them she’ll come around.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It smells so good in here. Never pegged you for a chef.” she jokes, coming around the island counter to lean her head against the arm not whisking the potatoes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I have many talents, Kenobi. Some you’ve been privy to…” he smirks before leaning into her to whisper “...some you’ll just have to wait and see.” He punctuates his remark with a quick kiss to her earlobe, the heat of the kitchen clearly not the reason for their respective blushes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I brought triple chocolate brownies, a Kenobi family staple.” she offers, pushing the tin foil tray to the center of the counter. He can tell how nervous she is, either from the fact that she will partake in a holiday with a group of people she barely knows or that she’s planning on spending the night with him...he can’t say he blames her. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Dinner thankfully turns out to be actually edible, the dishes clearing themselves with the help of eight hungry college students. Finn’s friend, Gwen, was just telling some random story that he hadn’t been paying attention to (who knew watching Rey eat green beans was so alluring?) causing the whole table to laugh and jeer loudly. After the table had been cleared up it became a mix of drinking games, dancing and taking photos against a makeshift photobooth wall, courtesy of Rose. Ben was happy to see that Rey had brought her Polaroid camera, snapping pictures of Hux with Rose, Finn with Gwen and Jessika, Ezra attempting to jump on Ben’s back. He loved watching her take the pictures, the dazzling passion in her eyes as she snapped these candid moments.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay, Miss Photographer, it’s time for you to get in front of the lens. Ben, please come take a picture with your girl.” Rose coos, yanking the camera out of Rey’s hands. He can already see her nerves, but intends to pull her close and make her feel comfortable. Ben slings his arm over her shoulders and looks down at her with a smile at the same time she looks up at him with a smile, the flash of the camera capturing the moment perfectly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ok, now do something funny!” Rose eggs on. Without thinking, Ben swiftly picks her up bridal style and makes a silly face, Rey’s surprised laughter a perfectly captured reaction.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He literally picked her up like she weighs nothing.” Finn laughs off camera, taking a sip of wine. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ok, last one! Do something romantic!” Rose cheers, a mischievous glint in her eye. The group coos teasingly, a blush spreading across both Ben and Rey’s faces. Ben looks down at her, shrugging his shoulders with a smile. She rolls her eyes, reaching her hand out up to cup his jaw before pulling him down for a kiss. The room erupts into cheers and applause as the camera flashes the winning shot, Ben breaking apart the kiss to flip them off with a laugh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Alright now, children. Go about your business.” he states, waving them off to return to whatever Thanksgiving beer pong game they were playing. Once the attention is off them he turns to look at her with a concerned eye. “Hey, I’m sorry about that. If it made you uncomfortable…”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben, it’s okay.” she says reassuringly, taking his hand and squeezing it. “I’m the one that kissed <em> you</em>, remember?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He scoffs with a laugh, shaking his head at the realization. She <em> actually </em> kissed him first, with <em> actual </em> witnesses around. That was no minor feat. “Yes, yes you did.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/9iib3Dn">  </a>
</p>
<p>Rey grinds into him further and faster as he pants her name underneath him. She had impatiently waited for everyone to leave the party, practically dragging Ben to his room to lock the door at first chance. They had quickly shucked every article of clothing except for underwear as she straddled his lap, kissing him feverishly as she slid her dampened core against his growing hardness. She pins him to the mattress with his arms over his head as she peppers bruising kisses down his throat, thrusting herself against him for shared release. He’s never seemed to ask why they don’t just go all the way, but he also certainly doesn’t seem to be complaining about the alternative.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, <em> fuck</em>...you look so beautiful riding me, baby. Come for me. <em> Please</em>.” he groans quietly, his deep voice sending the necessary vibrations to topple her over the edge. She comes with a breathy whine, deep grunts and pooling warmth under her indicating that he has too. She presses her chest against his as they settle their fragmented breaths, skin slick with sweat as they kiss each other lazily. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Can I borrow something to wear?” she asks softly after a few minutes of silence, tracing a cluster of moles on his shoulder. He nods over to the chest of drawers in the corner of the room, a silent invitation to take what she needs. Eventually she tears herself away from him to clean up, going over to the drawers to pull out one of his signature black t-shirts and throwing it over herself. He watches her with such fascination as the shirt practically looks like a dress on her, Rey shimmying down her underwear and discarding it discreetly in the corner. When she disappears into the bathroom to freshen herself up for bed, he changes into a new pair of black boxer briefs, peeling back the covers to get under as she returns. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s a comfortable silence between them as she snuggles onto his pillow, her skin glowing from the pale moonlight shining through the window. He’s awestruck with the way her hair is fanned across the pillow, her gaze softly on him as she traces circles against his skin. He thinks that she’ll just fall asleep right then and there.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Is it true that you were in a drug ring last year?” she asks quietly. He has to stifle a laugh at the random absurdity of her question, but laughs a little harder when she giggles back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Is that what the people are saying?” he quips, earning another giggle from her. “I’m sorry to disappoint, but no. I didn’t go to school last semester because my uncle took me on an anger management retreat. Six weeks of isolation in the Endor forest really teaches you a lot about yourself.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh…” her voice is quiet, almost like she feels bad for asking. There’s a pregnant pause before he speaks up again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well since we’re trading rumors...is it true that Jacob Abrams had to get testicular reconstruction surgery because you kicked him in the balls?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She snorts with laughter, covering her face in embarrassment. “Hey, he deserved it! Trying to grab my ass when I wouldn’t let him buy me coffee and tell me about his totally bitchin’ sports car.” They share another laugh, Ben shrugging with agreement. “What about eating the live chicken?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rumor. A dumb one at that.” he scoffs. “The accent?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Real. I was born in England, moved here when I was five. Kay was too young for the accent to stick but me, mum and dad all have it.” Ben purses his lips in amusement, earning a shy grin from Rey. “Tell me something true.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Something true?” he asks, Rey nodding in confirmation. “I hate brussel sprouts.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She scoffs, shoving him deftly in the shoulder. “You know what I mean, dickhead. Something that no one else knows.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay…” he clears his throat, bringing his face closer to hers so that she can feel his warm breath on her skin. “You’re sweet.” He presses a soft kiss to her cheek. “You’re sexy.” He presses another kiss to the column of her throat. “And you totally have the hots for me.” He punctuates his last sentence with a kiss to her smiling lips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re incredibly self-assured, has anyone ever told you that?” she jokes, tilting her head back to allow him to continue pressing his lips against her throat. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Sweetheart, I tell myself that every day.” he croons with a deep chuckle, sucking a particular spot against her skin that has her pressing her thighs together. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re insufferable.” she mutters, trying to keep her cool as he climbs off his side to hover over her. He softly grinds into her as he continues his ministrations on her throat, eliciting a small gasp at the realization that she’s not wearing panties and that it’s only his underwear that is a barrier between them. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She can’t deny that the feeling is intoxicating, her hips bucking up to meet his every advance. His kisses trail down to her clothed breasts, taking one into his mouth and nibbling at it through the thin fabric. A large hand begins to trail down her body until it reaches where they’re joined, teasing softly around the supple skin. A pleading whine escapes her lips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, I’m sorry. Would you like me to stop? Since I’m so <em> insufferable</em>?” he teases, pulling himself off her at all points as he hovers above her. She whimpers softly, grabbing the nape of his neck to try to bring him back down but he’s too strong to budge. “I need you to tell me, sweetheart. I want to hear your pretty little accent tell me exactly what you want.” he mutters darkly, sending a fresh wave of arousal down her core.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben, <em> please </em> touch me.” The part of her that tries to play it cool absolutely hates how small and needy she sounds, but that part of her has been body slammed out of the way to make way for the overwhelming part that <em> needs </em> him. Needs to feel him and have him feel her. He smirks and she practically forces him down to her lips to shut the smug look off his face. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben stuffs his hands deep in the pockets of his coat, desperate to get warm as he waits in the rose garden. <em> Fuck</em>, why did he think that meeting Dameron outside at the end of November was a good idea? It doesn’t matter, he has to do this. He’s been talking himself into it for days since Rey spent the night at his house. Every time he felt himself getting genuinely happier being with her, the dark cloud over his mind would remind him how much of an asshole he is. To be fair (if he even deserves fairness), the money hadn’t been a motivator to be with her since their first kiss. As soon as they kissed atop that hillside it’s been only <em> her </em> keeping him around. But he still has to end this bullshit with Poe Dameron once and for all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey, big guy. We weren’t set to meet until Friday. What, did she--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t want to hear it, Dameron. I’m ending this, for good this time. No more money.” Ben states firmly, hoping the deep scowl on his face sends the message. Poe raises his eyebrows curiously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I get it.” he acquiesces with a sigh. “The bitch is a tough one--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Don’t </em> fucking call her that.” he whispers harshly, gritting his teeth as he prods a finger into Dameron’s chest. “Don’t talk about her at all. Don’t talk <em> to </em> her. Don’t even fucking <em> look </em> at her. Or you’ll fucking regret it, understood?” He’s seething with rage but trying his best to keep his composure. All the work he’s achieved with his anger management will not be thrown away because of this model-wannabe trust fund baby. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey hey, okay man. Understood.” Poe affirms, throwing his hands up in innocence. “Kinda works out. I’m <em> this </em> close to finally getting it in with Kay, so your services will soon no longer be required.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben has to bite the inside of his cheek and clench his fists together in an attempt to restrain from punching him. Hearing how he talks about her, Rey’s little sister for that matter, sends bile up this throat. He gives Poe another stern grimace before stomping away. <em> He’s not worth it, he’s not worth it, he’s not worth it</em>. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey! You can’t seriously be this much of a bitch right now!” Kaydel shrieks, chasing after her sister in the living room. Kaydel wants Rey to hang out with Ben tomorrow night so that she could go to Kappa Alpha Psi’s ‘A December to Remember’ party but Rey has flat out refused. Dr. Kenobi has come to realize that any attempt at intervention is futile, so he resided himself to the living room to watch the basketball game and drown out his daughters’ argument.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I can and I will! You don’t just get to use me as a show pony every time you want to go out with that sleazeball! <em> God </em>, I just don’t understand what you see in him--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well I could say the same about you! What the hell does Ben even see in you besides being a bitchy ill-tempered prude!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Fuck you</em>!” Rey screams, shoving her sister out of her way and stomping up the stairs. The foundation of the house shakes with the strength in which Rey uses to slam her bedroom door shut, leaving her sister and father in stunned silence. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey flops onto her bed face first, groaning into her pillow. It’s been awhile since she and Kay had fought like that, both of them being able to enjoy an amicable truce with each other since the start of the semester. Rey doesn’t know how much time in solitude passes before there is a soft knock on her door. She groans again in response as the knob turns to reveal her younger sister. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Go away.” Rey spits, turning her head over to face the opposite wall. Kaydel does not obey, coming around the edge of her bed to sit next to her sister's laying body. A few moments of silence pass between them, Kaydel sighing softly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m sorry. That was a bitchy thing to say.” she says quietly, her eyes glossed over the wall of photos. “It’s just that I’ve suddenly gotten to have all this freedom and...it doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have said it.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey perks her head up from the pillow before sitting up against the headboard, curling her knees to her chest. She can see the look in her sister’s eyes, a look all too familiar when she was the same age. There’s an ache in her chest, a need to be truthful. It’s time to finally come clean and have a real heart to heart with her sister. “Poe never told you about him and I, did he?” Rey says nervously.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kaydel scoffs sarcastically. “Uh huh, yeah sure.” She looks over to her older sisters eyes to see that she’s being completely serious, lips pursed in a flat line. “Holy shit, you’re not kidding. But you <em> hate </em> him! When? How?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I hate him <em> now</em>. We met in a class sophomore year, he was so charming and a total babe.” Rey mocks, reflecting on that time in her life. “He always wanted to take me to parties, and I wanted him to like me so much that I would lie to Dad and say that I was taking night classes or studying late in the library. It was a lot of fun, I was reckless and free and trying to get over my grief about Mom. Everyone was doing things that I was curious about, and he seemed more than happy to see how far I could go. We were only together for two weeks when we...” Rey trails off, looking to her sister to fill in the blank.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kaydel gasps, covering her mouth with her hands. “You and him--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just once. It was...my first time.” Rey sighs, gathering her thoughts for a moment. “Afterwards, I told him I didn’t want to anymore because I wasn’t ready and he just kind of...blew me off. It fucking sucked. And I swore to myself after that that I’d never do anything just because everyone else was doing it.” Her sister is in silent shock as Rey explains her story.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“How come I never knew about this?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I threatened that if he ever told anyone I would tell every sorority on campus how bad the sex was.” Rey snorts with laughter. Kaydel releases a huff of laughter too, still reeling from this revelation. Rey takes a moment to remember just how pale his face had gotten when she said that, immediately guaranteeing his eternal silence. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay, so why did <em> you </em> never tell me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I wanted you to make up your mind about him. I wanted you to be responsible, but I didn’t want to get in the way of you having your own experiences.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kaydel is quiet for a minute, as if shuffling through her own memories. “I have noticed that he’s been trying to get more and more physical with me. It’s nice to feel wanted, but I still don’t think I’m ready.” Rey nods in understanding, happy that her sister is being so open with her. “It’s funny because you assumed I wanted to go to that party with Poe, but I’ve actually met someone else that I really like.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey raises her eyebrows in surprise, the Kenobi sisters are taking turns sharing their own secrets today it would seem. “He’s in my chemistry class...go figure. It started off as just us being friendly, but when Poe would disappear at a party he would always be there to stay with me. I got to know him more and realized that he was kind, dependable, selfless...everything I started to notice that Poe isn’t. It took awhile but now I’m starting to realize what I want for myself, and I think Ezra is it.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey is beaming at her sister, before practically gasping in surprise at the mention of Ezra’s name. “Oh I know him! Well, <em> know </em> is a bit of a reach. He was at Thanksgiving with us at Ben’s house. He’s a really nice guy, I’m happy for you Kay.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thanks.” she responds with a shy smirk. “I’m happy for you too. I can see how much Ben likes you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey looks down at her lap with a smile. She wonders if it's apparent how much she likes him too. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I wanted the conversation between the Kenobi sisters to go better than the Stratford sisters in 10TIHAY because it really took a lot for Rey and Kay to have a heart to heart like that; I wanted it to bring them closer, not drive them apart. Also, having Ben actually stop the money before getting caught was also something I thought was important...even if it still brings us to the same revelation.</p>
<p>The Inevitable Angst is happening in the next chapter and I'm not looking forward to it 😭  </p>
<p>I'm gonna try to upload the chapters more frequently since I already have most of them written out and I've plagued myself with a lot of WIPs (a blessing and a curse lol). Please let me know what you think of the story so far!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi so we've reached the first stop on the Pain Train, but I PROMISE there's a happy ending (I'm literally incapable of writing anything less)</p>
<p>before we get into the sadness can we please take a moment to appreciate this GORGEOUS PIECE OF ART made by one of my dear sweet readers/friends @Gracienne on Twitter. like ya'll don't understand I almost cried when I saw this it's so perfect and amazing! it makes me so incredibly grateful that there are people that love my stories and find comfort in them and are willing to make beautiful art inspired by them, thank you all so much.</p>
<p>and now, on with the show (please don't hate me, I promise it was so hard to write this chapter 😭 )</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/EZpjFvt">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kappa Alpha Psi’s ‘A December to Remember’ party is not where Rey expected to spend her Friday night, but after her heart to heart with Kaydel she felt like she owed it to her little sister to give her this. Upon finding out that she’s not actually going with Poe but with Ezra makes her feel a little better about the situation, that her sister is finally seeing that she deserves someone who <em> actually </em> cares about her. She can see them sitting on a couch in the corner talking, Ezra’s arm draped over her shoulders as she cuddles into his side. Rey’s also got an arm draped over her shoulders too, Ben’s warmth enveloping her and also shielding her from the tipsy partygoers around them. They’re leaning against the wall in the far side of the living room away from most of the action as they take sips out of their respective red cups.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You know when you suggested that we come to this thing I had half a mind to file a missing person’s report. I was so sure someone kidnapped you.” Ben chuckles as he leans in to speak to her over the loud music. She giggles, swatting her hand against his abdomen as she rolls her eyes. Rose and Hux are also around here somewhere but she can’t be bothered to worry about them when she has him looking at her like that. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Something feels different about them tonight, he’s holding her closer and kissing her more and whispering sweet nothings in her ear. It’s a dizzying concoction mixed with her slow acceptance of her feelings for him. She trusts him way more than she thought she would ever trust another person, and he makes her feel safe and sexy and everything she’s never felt about herself. It’s almost like a switch goes off in her head, she <em> wants </em> him. And not in the way she’s wanted him before...she wants <em> all of him</em>. And she wants him to want all of her. Maybe it's the vodka cranberry that has her tugging him further into the corner by his shirt until her back is flush against the wall, his arms coming up to cage her in. He’s momentarily surprised, but makes quick work to deposit their drinks on a nearby table so he can hold her waist and kiss her without abandon. The taste of the whiskey on his tongue is delicious and addicting, Rey wasting no time to wrap her arms around his neck to bring him impossibly closer. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Damn Kenobi...not that I’m complaining but what’s gotten into you?” Ben chuckles against her lips.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I want <em> you</em>…” she whispers, her eyes still closed so she can’t see his reaction. “...<em>all </em> of you. Tonight.” She feels his lips break away from hers, mentally cursing herself for fucking up this moment. Finally peeking her eyes open all she can see is his eyes wide with wonder and dark with lust, his plump lips slightly agape. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you sure?” he rasps, his hands coming up to cup her face. She nods, her fierce gaze meeting his. He quickly catches her lips again, a quick fervor of tongue and skin before smacking them apart and taking her hand. He obviously doesn’t want to waste any more time at this stupid party, leading them towards the closest exit as they snake through the crowd. Rey’s heart is beating a million miles a minute, squeezing his hand tightly with anticipation and excitement that she’ll finally get to do this with someone she cares about--</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Solo!” a voice roars through the crowd before a figure comes to block their path. Rey glances from behind Ben to see the perpetrator as none other than Poe Dameron. Ben freezes in front of her, his hand gripping hers tightly as he tries to keep her behind him. She doesn’t budge but instead moves up to stand directly next to him and in front of Poe. “What’s Kay doing here with that son of a bitch Bridger? I didn’t pay you to take out Kenobi so that some little punk asshole could steal Kay away from me!” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey feels like she’s underwater, every sound drowning out as her vision goes blurry. She did <em> not </em> just hear what she thought she heard. Poe Dameron <em> paying </em> Ben to take her out? She’s truly entered the eighth layer of hell, immediately tearing her hand away from Ben’s and looking up at him. He’s not even looking at Dameron anymore, his wide wanting eyes now replaced with guilt and shame. Neither of them are able to say anything before they’re interrupted again with a crashing noise and a dozen gasps. Rey finds the strength to look away from the man who betrayed her to see Poe lying on the floor holding his face and groaning as blood oozes out from between his hands, Kaydel standing over him with her fist out and her chest heaving. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> Holy shit</em>, her little sister just <em> punched </em> Poe Dameron. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The entire party has gone silent as they take in the sight around them. Rey can’t comprehend what’s just transpired before her legs are carrying her out of the house at Olympic speed. She paces down Frat Row as the chilly December night whips around her, desperate to be as far away from all of this as possible. She doesn’t know how far she makes it down the street before the roaring in her ears are replaced with the distant sounds of someone calling after her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Rey</em>! Rey, please wait! Let me explain!” Ben yells, his long legs catching up to her before she can make a mad dash again. He manages to take her forearm and spin her around before she’s shoving him in the chest with as much power as she can muster.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What is there to explain? You were paid to take me out by the one person I truly hate!” she bellows, tears threatening to escape the corner of her eyes. She <em> can’t </em> cry in front of him, she can’t let him know that he has this much of an effect on her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, sweetheart...please…” he begs quietly. “I stopped taking the money. I ended it! When I realized how much I--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“When? When did you stop?” she growls.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His head falls in shame, a soft exhale leaving his lips. “Last week.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She scoffs with ragged breath, crossing her arms over her chest. “Last week, huh? You mean after I kissed you? Or after I met your parents? Or sucked your--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, <em> please</em>. You have to know how much you mean to me. The money means nothing--”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“How much money? Huh? What is the value of <em> my </em> life? Of my <em> sister’s </em> life? What price did <em> Poe Dameron </em> put on our heads that made it such a desirable offer?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It doesn’t matter. The money doesn’t matter. I only care about you--” He tries to reach for her hands when she shoves him again, harder, stumbling him back momentarily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re a monster, Ben Solo. I knew this was too good to be true...that <em> you </em> were too good to be true.” she sobs quietly, the tears now flowing freely down her cheeks. When he says nothing, she spins on her heel and makes a mad dash down the street, refusing to turn around as she disappears into the night. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>A knock on her bedroom door takes her out of her bleak clouding thoughts as she slumps further in her duvet. She has no idea what time it is but it’s definitely not a socially acceptable time for her to still be in bed. She doesn’t care. She doesn’t care about anything anymore. Not since she found out Ben Solo didn’t care about her. The door creaks open to reveal Kaydel, carrying a glass of orange juice and a bagel with cream cheese.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey. Thought you might be hungry.” she says softly, depositing the food on her bedside table. Rey groans and shifts to face her sister, who’s taken a seat at the edge of her bed. “He was here earlier. Asking to talk to you. Begging, actually.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t want to talk to him. I have nothing to say.” she mumbles into her pillow, hoping it will absorb the fresh wave of tears that she can feel forming. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know. Dad talked to him...couldn’t hear what he actually said but it sounded pretty stern. He left looking like a kicked puppy.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey scoffs, the closest thing she can muster to a laugh. She hasn’t even begun to look at the messages on her phone, having to put it on Do Not Disturb when the incessant vibrating was driving her crazy last night. She did manage to speak to Rose for a bit, her best friend promising to come see her whenever Rey was ready to talk about it. The problem is she doesn’t know if she ever will. How exactly can you explain that you fell in love with someone whose entire relationship with you was based on a lie?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Yes...in the midst of her deep long crying session at 3:00am, Rey realized she was hopelessly in love with Ben Solo. Or at least the thought of Ben Solo, the man she thought she knew. The revelation made everything hurt more, tainted every happy memory she could think of. That the man she loved was collecting a steady income on the contingency that he spend time with her. Was she that awful of a person that her company had to be bought? Was she truly incapable of being a girl worth loving as she is, no strings attached?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thanks for this, Kay.” Rey says softly, glancing at the small breakfast on her table. “How’s your hand doing?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kaydel shrugs, a small chuckle escaping her lips. “Feels good. Not as good as it felt punching that slimy son of a bitch.” The sisters share a laugh, Rey feeling something other than pain for the first time since she had her heart ripped out by Ben Solo. </p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Numb. That’s all that he can manage to feel. He doesn’t deserve to feel numbness, he deserves to feel heart-wrenching pain, pain that should be a hundred times more pain than he gave to the girl he loves. He’s been grappling with <em> that </em> possibility for weeks now and he has no reason to deny it: he is desperately in love with Rey Kenobi.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not that it matters anymore, he betrayed her and she rightfully hates his guts. He curses himself for letting Poe’s bullshit get this far, maybe if he had stopped it sooner he could’ve redeemed himself, maybe she would still be with him. He hasn’t been able to sleep for the last few days, every time he closes his eyes he’s reminded of the pain and betrayal in those big beautiful eyes. He went against his better judgement and knocked on her front door the very next day after the party, but he should’ve known there was no way that she’d see him. Instead he came face to face with her father, the look of disappointment like daggers through his body.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Look, I don’t know what happened...she won’t exactly talk to me, or anyone for that matter.” Dr. Kenobi had told him on the front porch. “But all I know is you need to give her some space. Give her time to get her thoughts in order. She’s exactly like her mother in that way.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Another pang of guilt. Rey doesn’t even have a mother to console her, the fact that she will have to go through these feelings alone breaks him even further. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“...I love her.” he muttered, his head hung low in despair. He didn’t look up to see her father’s reaction, and if he was surprised by the revelation he didn’t make it known. Instead he brought his hand up to Ben's shoulder and gripped it sympathetically.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“If that’s true, then you’ll go home and get some rest. If it’s meant to be, you guys will work things out.” Dr. Kenobi nodded, squeezing his shoulder momentarily before leaving Ben on the porch.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And now here he is three days later, laying flat on his bed with the lights off and the blinds shut, grappling with where to go from here. He’s texted her more times than he can count, most of them emphatic apologies and begging for forgiveness, other’s just small reminders that he cares about her and that he is not giving up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Rey, please. Please speak to me. Please let me tell you how truly sorry I am. </b>
  <b>Let me prove to you how much I care about you. How much you mean to me</b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: I can’t stop thinking about you. I miss you so much. It kills me to know how much I’ve hurt you.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’m asking for it anyway. I know I’m not a good person, but you made me a good person. A better person. A person I can actually be proud of.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: I will do anything for you to forgive me. Just say the word and I’ll do it. I need you.</b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>His texts continue to go unanswered, maybe even unread altogether. He wouldn’t blame her if she blocked his number and chucked her phone into the ocean just to get rid of him. But whatever it takes, he will continue to try. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter 17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi, we're still in sad times but I PROMISE things will turn around for our favorite curmudgeons soon. please let me know what you think of the story so far either in the comments or on twitter @blessedreylo ♥️ enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/cWyLmEA">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey has finally finished her last final of the semester, practically bursting out of the lecture hall as soon as she filled in the last bubble on the scantron. It hurts to breathe the same air as Ben for the first time in almost a week, even if he was sitting 10 rows behind her while they took their Psych exam. She desperately tries not to make eye contact with him when she climbs the stairs out of the lecture hall, but she could feel the dark intensity of his gaze following her every move. She thought she had wrung herself dry of all the tears her body was capable of producing, but seeing him again seemed to refill the tank. Her Advanced Photography final was merely a presentation of their current portfolio, her Feminist Theory final paper was submitted two days ago, and now that her Psych 101 test is behind her she can spend the next few weeks of winter break wallowing in her sadness uninterrupted. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As soon as she pulls up in her own driveway her phone begins to ring. Groaning, she automatically thinks it's Ben attempting to contact her. He’s been relentless, sending a flourish of texts, attempted calls, not to mention coming up to the house to try to talk to her in person. A microscopic part of her is happy with the fact that he hasn’t given up on her, that her appeal to him wasn’t automatically thrown away once the money was no longer involved. She has to continue to repress that part of her deep down and hope it doesn’t grow, unable to begin to think about what forgiving him would look like right now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She looks up at her phone screen to an unknown number, the area code definitely not local. If it’s some incessant telemarketer trying to piss her off even more…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hello?” Rey states flatly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi Rey! This is Ahsoka Tano from Coruscant’s Global Photography Program. Is now a good time?” a chipper voice states from the otherside of the line. Rey practically jolts in her seat, thankful to not be driving. She presses the phone further to her ear and clears her throat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh, hi Ms. Tano! Yes, yes it is. How are you?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m well, thank you for asking. I just want to go ahead and get right to it. We’ve selected you to participate in the final round of interviews for the program!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey lets out an internal squeal, covering the receiver on her phone to make sure Ahsoka can’t hear her. <em> Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit</em>…“Wow, that’s amazing. Thank you so much, Ms. Tano! I’m incredibly honored.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well we’re honored that you’ve applied and made it this far. I’ll be sending you an email in a bit with the details of this final round but I thought I’d give you a quick overview now to get you familiar.” Rey nods even though she knows it won’t be seen, hoping her silence will get Ahsoka to continue. “We’d like for you to showcase something that you hate or dislike in a way that would make you love it. You can interpret that how you will. You may also choose any type of medium to display this project but it must follow this prompt. We would also like you to present your project on the 18th. I know it doesn’t give you a lot of time to prepare, but we’re hoping with your talent and tenacity you can create something amazing.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey is speechless as she listens to the woman speak. She must admit that she’s had absolutely no creative inspiration since her breakup (can you even call it a breakup when you weren’t technically together?) with Ben. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s perfect, Ms. Tano. I won’t let you down.” Rey responds with as much confidence as she can muster.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Atta girl. We’ll be in touch. Goodbye, Ms. Kenobi.” Once the call drops, Rey sags in her drivers seat as she lets out a shaky exhale. It will take every ounce of energy she has to put something together, but this program is her one way ticket out of this place so she has to give it everything she’s got.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“What the hell are you gonna do, Rey? Your presentation is due in 2 days!” Rose exclaims, sitting cross-legged on Rey’s bed with a plastic pad thai container in her lap. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You don’t think I know that!” Rey has her forehead pressed against her desk, groaning loudly as she pushes her takeout out of the way. She’s been in a creative rut ever since she received her prompt, nothing sparking much needed inspiration to get her into this program. She’s grabbed her camera and driven all around town looking for things she dislikes (which thankfully gives her a lot to choose from) and trying to make it beautiful behind a lens. Nothing is working and she’s honestly losing hope that this will be the end of the road for her. Thankfully the distraction of her presentation has pushed thoughts of Ben to the side, but  when Rey is really down in the dumps she caves and reads more of his messages.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Good morning beautiful, I hope you have a nice day. I miss you so much. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: A Night Sisters song came up on Spotify today and I instantly thought of you. Remembering how you danced in that crowd like you didn’t give a care in the world. Hope you’re doing well. I miss you</b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Ben: Rose came by for dinner tonight. She kept giving me death glares (which I obviously deserve)</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>I had to try really hard not to ask her about you. I know she wouldn’t tell me any way because she’s such a good friend but I would do anything just to know how you are right now</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rose has been a steady rock for her in her post-Ben life, checking up on her every day, coming over when she needs a shoulder to cry on and offering support to prepare her for this presentation. She’s also had to bite her tongue on divulging any news about Ben that she either hears from Hux or sees when she’s over at their apartment. As much as Rose wants to tell Rey how miserable he’s been without her, she can’t let her best friend get distracted from the task at hand. As they begin brainstorming new ideas, a soft knock at the door interrupts them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hi girls.” Dr. Kenobi announces gently, opening the door. Rey instantly notices a large box in his other hand. “This was sitting on the porch with your name on it.”<br/><br/></p>
<p>“I didn’t order anything.” Rey mutters as her father deposits the box on her bed. It’s not indicated with a company logo or anything, just her first name written on the side. Her father shrugs with a weak smile, closing the door behind him. Rey takes a seat on the edge of the bed, precariously staring at the mystery box. Rose rises to her knees in curiosity, attempting to lift the box and realizing how heavy it is.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Open it! Open it!” Rose smiles excitedly. Rey rolls her eyes and tears the box open, gasping when the contents are revealed. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The first thing that catches her eye is a brand new Nikon D5600 DSLR camera. Her current secondhand camera pales in comparison to this beauty, turning it in her hands to marvel its size and capability. Amongst it are a plethora of camera accessories: long and short range lenses, a tripod, a sleek carrying case, a portable ring light and three different types of memory cards. Rose gasps and mutters surprised expletives to herself as they both rummage through the contents of the box. Rey’s blind elation to the insane surprise of gifts falters slightly when she sees a piece of paper with her name neatly written on it. Her heart sinks in her stomach when she recognizes the handwriting, her hands shaking as she unfolds the letter.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> To the beauty behind the lens, </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I know what you’re about to say, but I promise I’m not trying to buy your forgiveness. Consider this a much better investment of the money I should’ve never taken in the first place.  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em> I know you will go on to do great things, even if that means I’m not around to see it. Please know how much I care about you and how you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em> I regret the choices I made that brought me to you, but I will never regret every single moment you were in my life. I know earning your forgiveness will not be easy, and to be honest I don’t know if I even deserve it. I promise to make it up to you everyday of my life if you’ll allow me.  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Yours Always, Ben </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey doesn’t realize she’s been holding her breath until she finishes reading the letter, a broken sob escaping her lips. Rose is watching her sympathetically as she silently reads the letter, Rey turning it over to Rose as she cups her face in her hands and curls her knees into her chest. She tries to regain her breathing as Rose reads the letter to herself with a heavy sigh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Wow</em>...this is...what are you going to do?” Rose asks, trying to gather her thoughts together. Rey hastily wipes the stray tears that are running down her cheeks, shaking her head. God, as if it wasn't already hard enough for her to admit to herself that she loves him...he goes on and does this? His words swirl around in her mind, how  beautiful they sound when she reads them in his deep mesmerizing voice. They make her already wavering pride jostle at the fact that he actually still cares about her, that he might even--</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I have no idea...I feel like I can’t even begin to think about him until I get my presentation ready.” she mutters. A moment of silence passes before Rey sits up, a lightbulb flashing in her head and through her eyes. She sits up and climbs off her bed to her desk, prying open her laptop.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What? What is it?” Rose asks with slightly curious panic. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I think I have an idea.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi friends! ok so I'm really excited for you all to read this chapter, so please let me know what you think in the comments!</p>
<p>also, want to give a special shoutout to Cristina (@ang3lview on twitter) for creating this amazing drawing of Ben and Rey! i'm seriously so in love with it and the rest of her work ♥️</p>
<p>ENJOY!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/qRixaMu">  </a>
</p>
<p>Ben doesn’t even know what day it is, nor does he really give a fuck. Why would it matter when all he’s done since winter break started is stare at the ceiling in despair and watch his roommates play video games? And the real kicker is that he’s not <em> actually </em>paying attention, just absentmindedly watching the screen while his mind plays the memories of Rey over and over again. Her laugh, the sparkle in her eye, the way she would sneak pieces of food off his plate when she thought he wasn’t looking but definitely was. Hux and Finn try not to acknowledge it, knowing that Ben’s never been forthcoming in expressing his emotions. And he never says anything back to them, speaking in only mutters and grunts when he’s not cooped up in his room. He spends a lot of time thinking and regretting, which he’s starting to realize is a deadly combination. She’s been radio silent since that fateful night, not even responding to the gifts he had dropped off on her porch. Not that he was expecting her to, but he really hopes she liked them. That she thought about him fondly even if only for a moment. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tonight’s about to be one of many lonely nights, Finn’s already gone home for the holidays and Hux is spending the weekend with Rose and her family. Ben debated on whether or not he should go home too, and maybe he would’ve considered it if Rey was still around, but it’ll be nothing but tortuous questions from his parents of how much he fucked up and he’s just not ready for that. He’s resigned himself to drinking beer and putting some random movie on in the background to fill the painful silence when there’s a knock at the door. He’s not expecting company, and it better not be any fucking Christmas carolers--</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He absentmindedly swings the door open to reveal a pair of familiar hazel eyes. He falters slightly when he realizes that Rey is standing on his doorstep. She looks so soft and unsure, and although she seems like a former shell of herself she’s still undeniably beautiful. He realizes he’s just been staring at her without saying anything so he clears his throat and opens the door wider.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey? What are you doing here? Are you okay?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, I’m...fine.” she replies softly, looking down at the ground. She’s dressed in a green oversized crewneck sweater and black jeans, clutching herself as she trembles either from the cold or her nerves. He silently gestures her to come in, Rey hesitating for a moment before nodding and walking in. The air is thick with uncertainty and tension, Ben waiting with bated breath to see what she’ll do or say. “How are you?” she asks softly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ve been better.” he muses with a nervous chuckle, running a hand through his hair. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I just...<em>shit</em>, I didn’t really think about what I was going to say…” she mumbles, biting the nail of her forefinger. Ben has noticed that as one of her nervous ticks, always gently swatting her hands from her mouth when he’d see her do it in an attempt to kick the habit. He doesn’t really think that’s appropriate now, so he keeps his hands to himself as she slowly paces the room. “I think it would just be best to show you.” She hands him a small thin notebook he didn’t realize she was carrying. He stares at it in his hands for a few moments, the cover revealing nothing of its contents. “I submitted this as the presentation for my final interview.” she clarifies softly as he begins to open the first page.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/FYUVYSd">  </a>
</p>
<p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/w6TakOz">  </a>
</p>
<p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/p2DRU8L">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben has no idea what he looks like when he glances back up at her, his heart beating a thousand miles a minute. This presentation is beautiful and so undeniably Rey; he’s slightly taken aback at the fact that he's never seen some of these pictures, meaning that she's been taking them spontaneously the entire time they’ve known each other. For some reason it swells his heart with joy. She’s chewing her lower lip nervously, her eyes darting from the notebook to his eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The prompt was to take something you hate or dislike and showcase it in a way that you…” she pauses to swallow the lump in her throat “...<em>love</em>.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ok, now he's truly shell shocked. Is she saying that she--</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, Ben. I <em> love </em> you. I hate that I love you, because it makes me feel vulnerable in a way I’ve never been before. But I also <em> hate </em> the idea of not loving you, so I’d rather love you than lose you.” Rey doesn’t realize how much she’s shaking until Ben pulls her into his arms, squeezing her tightly. When he releases her, he continues to shakily grip her by her arms and keep her close.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey, I’ve been in love with you for God knows how long. I’m <em> so </em> sorry I hurt you, I promise to spend every day making it up to you. To love you as you deserve to be loved.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her only response is to kiss him soundly, wrapping her arms tight around his neck as they pull themselves impossibly close to each other. The kiss feels familiar and new all at once, like saying ‘I love you’ has ascended their kisses into another plane of existence. Ben loves Rey and Rey loves Ben, everything that they can’t put into words sealed between their lips. Her hand cradles the back of his head as her fingers card through his hair, his hand keeping her steady and close as it presses into her lower back. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben…” she mutters softly against his lips. “I want you.” His body moves before his brain can think, scooping her up by the backs of her thighs and carrying her to his bedroom. She smiles against his lips, and when he softly deposits her on his bed he can’t help but smile back. His dream girl, the girl he almost lost, the girl that <em> loves </em> him...sprawled out on his bed like a goddess that he can’t wait to worship.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He unceremoniously removes her sweater and jeans before shucking off his own top. Before she can reach out to touch him he shakes his head, leaning her back against the mattress and pinning her hands over her head. Wet kisses trail the skin of her throat and chest, Rey’s short breaths hitching in her throat as he continues over the fabric of her bra. He suddenly stops and Rey finally has the ability to open her eyes and look at him quizzically.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This...is the same one you wore in that picture. When you showed me in the rose garden.” he says almost wistfully, taking one of the straps delicately between his fingers. She didn’t even realize it but he’s right, the same baby pink lace bralette from the blog post she accidentally showed him. Oh what a lifetime ago that day feels like. She giggles, squirming herself out of his grasp to peel it off her body and blindly toss it across the room. His wistful look grows lustful as he gently attacks the soft skin of her breasts, swirling his tongue and sucking her nipples with enthusiasm.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben...<em>fuck</em>…” she moans, her back arching slightly as he fits more of her in his mouth. As much as he would love to spend the entire night with her pretty little tits in his mouth, she deserves to feel good and he wants to give her everything she wants. His kisses trail lower and lower until they’re right under her navel, his nose pressing against the fabric of her panties. “Are you always going to be this much of a tease?” she huffs jokingly, her hand coming up to push his hair back. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Maybe.” He laughs as his thumb comes to gently stroke her through the soft cotton. “This is our first time, and I want to make it good for you. I got you, sweetheart. I promise.” He hopes she can see the adoration in his eyes, and he thinks she does when she nods slowly and returns him a similar look. He begins to gently peel her panties down her legs, offering her soft kisses on her thighs until the material is flung across the room to meet the rest of her clothing. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As much as he wants to, this part he can’t tease because he loves it too much. He loves the taste of her, the sounds she makes, the way she squirms when he sucks at just the right spot. Ben wastes no time getting right to it, licking and kissing and sucking her as the grip on his hair grows tighter. A string of profanities leave her lips when he finally prods a single finger into her, relishing in the way she clenches firmly around him and how it makes him painfully hard. <em> This is all about her, all about the girl you love</em>, he reminds himself. She quickly jolts with a whine when a second finger joins the mix, Rey’s breath heavy and short under his ministrations. The fluttering of her cunt indicates she’s close so he slowly withdraws himself and places a final kiss to her clit before sucking his fingers into his mouth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You’re still gross.” she laughs breathlessly, scrunching her nose as they recall the first time they did this. He laughs as he drops his sweatpants and reaches over to his bedside drawer to fish out a condom, finally rejoining her on the bed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you sure?” he asks quietly. He doesn’t know why but he knows she’s always been apprehensive about sex. He’s been more than okay to silently wait until she’s ready, but he wants her to be absolutely certain.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes. I love you.” she breathes, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. Those three words are still fresh, but he has a feeling he will never grow tired of hearing them from her lips. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>His hand comes up to softly cup her jaw, scanning her face ardently. “I love you, Rey.” he whispers, kissing the tip of her nose before sitting back on his knees to tear open the foil packaging. She sits up to help him, the two of them not breaking eye contact as their joined hands roll the condom on his length. Rey wiggles herself back to lay her head on his pillow, taking Ben by the back of his neck to kiss him as he hovers above her. She can feel the tip of him just barely touching her entrance as his tongue works its way into her mouth.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben, I trust you. <em> Please</em>.” she whispers onto his lips. He suddenly pushes himself inside her and she feels like she’s been pried open in the best way possible. It’s intimate and slightly uncomfortable, but the way he fills her is also delicious and breathtaking. He’s muttering sweet encouragement against the skin of her throat, taking his time to allow her to adjust before he’s fully sheathed inside. He looks down at her with his brows furrowed, scanning her face for any potential regret or discomfort. All she can do is smile and nod, kissing him as a small moan escapes the back of her throat. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He pulls out of her halfway before snapping his hips back in, causing her to yelp in aroused surprise. Their pace is steady and rhythmic, Ben studying Rey’s face and sounds to give her what she needs. It’s too soon for him to be feeling close but that’s what he should expect when the love of his life feels so warm and wet and <em> perfect</em>. He presses his thumb against her clit to add to the stimulation of her squeezing her breasts in her hands, her back arching further and further off the mattress. They moan each other’s names as they finally reach their climax, Rey coming first with a high-pitched cry as Ben pounds into her and reaches a peak of his own. It lasts between a minute and forever until they finally slow down, Ben leaning forward to capture Rey’s lips between his. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He covers her like a weighted blanket before realizing he’s probably squishing her, rolling over to his side to dispose of the condom and cuddle her into his chest. They’re silent albeit their labored breaths, the air thick and humid against their sweat slick skin. He turns his head to look at her, silently trying to gauge her thoughts. All he can see looking back at him are glossy hazel eyes and his favorite pair of lips curved into a soft smile. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey?” he asks, unsure of what he’s asking.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her thumb comes up to softly trace the outline of his full bottom lip. “I wish you had been my first.” she whispers almost imperceptibly. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her words hit him like a train, and instead of asking her about it like he wants to, he does what he knows she needs instead and pulls her close. He squeezes her petite frame as she nuzzles her face into his chest, a shaky sigh muffled against his skin. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/zGJTUEm">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It takes some time, <em> hell </em> it takes a lot of time, for Rey to truly feel like things with Ben are back to normal. Maybe not even normal, but a better, more trusting and loving version of the normal they started with. Things weren’t just going to magically fix themselves once they had sex and professed their love for each other, but it was clear from that moment on that they were going to be in this together. Ben came clean about everything, from the initial conversation he had with Poe, to the countless times he tried to stop, to his personal reasons for even taking the money to begin with. At first it was hard for Rey to hear, but she knew it needed to happen in order for them to truly move past everything. She also ended up sharing her own stories, nervously telling him why she hated Poe and how that experience had completely altered her perception on her life. Let’s just say it took Rey <em>a lot</em> of convincing and Ben <em>a lot</em> of restraint to not punch Poe’s recently repaired nose all over again. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey was also able to convince Ben to let them go to his parents house for Christmas dinner, in hopes of also repairing that strained relationship. He did it because it would make her happy, and he desperately wanted to do anything to make her happy. It ended up being a pretty normal affair, Han and Leia completely oblivious to their falling out but completely tuned in to how in love they were with each other. At some point in the evening, Han had even put his hand on Ben’s shoulder with a laugh and Ben had laughed back, not even attempting to pull away from his father's touch. They were baby steps, but steps he was more than willing to take with her by his side.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s now mid-January, with their last spring semester starting next week. Rey is only taking her Photography Portfolio Seminar, which will just help her fine tune her portfolio, networking skills and resume building for her future career. It will thankfully be a simple workload for her final semester of college, as she’s ready to finally begin her future. A future that is currently in the balance as she waits for a call back from CGPP; she’s been a nervous wreck ever since she presented her final project, especially with how personal and raw the work was to her. She’s trying to distract herself now as she sits in Ben’s living room with Ben, Finn, Rose, and Hux all watching a movie. She’s thankfully grown more comfortable being in a large group of friends (yes, <em> plural</em>, as in more than one), realizing that she doesn’t need to be alone anymore.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why are we watching this movie again?” Rose groans, leaning into Hux’s side as she takes a bite out of a Twizzler.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We let the high powers of Netflix Roulette decide our fate, and it decided to pick the most cringey early 2000’s rom-com in their entire catalogue.” Finn points out with his fist full of popcorn. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey is sitting on Ben's side on the couch as he lazily traces patterns along her shoulder with the arm that’s curled around her. She’s about to admit that she likes this movie when her phone begins to ring, a mysterious out of area number appearing on the screen. Ben must happen to be thinking the same thing when they both look at each other, their eyes wide with anticipation. He gives her a silent but encouraging nod before she scrambles off the couch and out of the room down the hallway. Their friends seem to notice what’s going on, but bring no attention to it so as to not put any pressure on the situation. They continue to absentmindedly watch the movie but Ben is visibly nervous as he takes a fingernail between his teeth, mentally cursing himself for picking up one of Rey’s bad habits.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She emerges back into the room a few minutes later, her phone clutched against her chest. They all turn to look at her with high hopes in their eyes, Finn quickly pausing the movie with the remote in his hand. Rey scans a look at each of her friends as she takes in a deep breath.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I got it!” she squeals, breaking the tense silence with overwhelming excitement. The entire room erupts in cheers and applause, everyone standing up to come hug her and offer their congratulations. Rey is absolutely giddy with excitement, everything that she’s worked for is finally paying off, she’s <em>finally </em> going to live her dreams. She’s so lost in the excited chaos that she doesn’t even notice that Ben is the last one to come hug her, but when he does it's the fiercest and most loving embrace that engulfs her in all the emotions of this moment. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m so fucking proud of you, sweetheart.” he mutters into her hair, pressing a kiss into her temple. Before she can even respond he’s scooping her up and hoisting her over his shoulder, earning laughs and yells from everyone in the room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Ben</em>! What the hell are you doing?” Rey squeals in between laughs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We’re gonna go celebrate.” he responds, a hint of mischief in his voice. She’s soon being carried down the hall as she bangs her fists on his back in a fit of laughter, playfully demanding him to put her down. Before they make it to his bedroom she overhears her friends voicing their concerns.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh hell no, we gotta get outta here.” Finn mutters.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yup, I’m not staying here for <em> that</em>.” Hux scoffs.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let’s go get pizza or something. Bye, have fun you crazy kids!” Rose yells out with a laugh. The front door quickly slams shut, leaving them for some much needed celebration.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Clothes are shed in record speed, and Ben wasting no time dropping to his knees in front of Rey sitting at the edge of his bed. She begins combing her fingers through his hair as he spreads her knees apart with his hands, pressing soft kisses to her inner thighs as he looks up at her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I love you so much, Rey. I’m so proud of you, and I’ll be here for you every step of the way.” Ben mutters against her skin, sucking soundly at the place just shy of where she needs him to be. He licks and kisses and sucks without abandon, Rey arching her back to press him further into her cunt. Her breathy whines and whispers of encouragement only motivate him more, her orgasm hitting her hard and way faster than she thought. She practically screams his name as she rides his face, pulling it up in between her hands shortly after to kiss him. It’s a dizzying feeling to kiss him with the taste of herself on his lips (something she found abhorrent when they first met), but she’s got a one track mind as she flips them over to sit on top of his knees.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Is this okay?” she whispers, running her hands over the tops of his thighs. They hadn’t yet had sex with her on top, but the wild look in Ben’s eyes and the guffawed sound he lets out seems to be all the answer she needs to shimmy herself up to him. It didn’t take long for Rey to convince herself that it was finally time to go on birth control, and once they had sex for the first time without a condom it was quickly becoming one of the greatest decisions she’s ever made in her life. She lines herself up with his cock in her hands, Ben’s hands comfortably resting on her hips to stabilize her. The feeling is electric as she slowly sinks down on him, noises of pleasure coming out of both of them simultaneously. When their hips finally meet, Rey lets out a sigh of relief, Ben reaching out to bend her forward and kiss her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Fuck</em>, you are so fucking perfect. So beautiful, sweetheart.” Ben groans when she finally starts rolling her hips. She relishes in the feeling of him everywhere, hitting every spot in her exquisitely. She can only moan in response as she slowly grinds herself up and down on his length. He soon takes matters into his own hands to quicken the pace, gripping her hips and bouncing her up and down at a breakneck pace. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<em>Yes</em>, Ben...please, yes…” she whines, throwing her head back and squeezing her eyes shut. She’s lost in the moment, only able to just feel him as he brings her closer and closer to the precipice. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Touch yourself, baby. <em> Need </em> you come...I’m so close…” he grits out, his voice hoarse and low. She quickly brings a hand between them, providing the pressure to her clit she desperately needs to join him. Rey feels pooling warmth inside her as Ben grunts expletives, unwilling to stop until she comes. It only takes her less than a minute to join him, Rey practically doubling over when her second orgasm crashes over her like a tsunami. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Once Rey musters the strength to climb off of him and lay down by his side, Ben takes her in his arms and cuddles her close as she reflects on the moment. Rey has a man that loves her, a group of friends, a loving family, and her dream job waiting in the wings…she’s never been happier in her entire life. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m so fucking proud of you. I knew you would get it.” he mumbles into her hair before kissing her head.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My six foot something cheerleader, always ready to go with the pom poms.” she smirks with a giggle.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You better believe it, baby.” he chuckles. They enjoy comfortable silence for a bitas Rey begins tracing patterns against his bare chest. The reality of her future is sinking in, that as soon as she graduates KVU she will start a new life in Coruscant with her dream job.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What are we going to do about us? Coruscant isn’t exactly the next city over.” she says with a twinge of sadness in her voice. She's wanted to move out of Corellia at the first chance she got because she thought there was nothing left here for her. Now everything she loves is here, and she’ll soon have to part with it all.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well...I’ve been thinking about that. I didn’t want to say anything until things were official with you, like I knew they’d be.” he pauses for a moment to stir Rey closer. “The uncle I told you about? That took me on that anger management retreat? He runs a non-profit in the city working with underserved youth. He helps kids find creative and healthy outlets for their anger and depression.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So, you--” she begins, sitting up on her elbow to stare down at him curiously. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I talked to him a few days ago and I have a job lined up in Coruscant. If you want me to, of course.” he adds the second part nervously, like he’s unsure if she’d even want him to go with her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You would move almost halfway across the country...for me?” she asks dubiously. He sits up to join her, cupping her face in his massive hand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s not every day you meet a girl who uses you as her creative muse for the most important presentation of her life.” he smirks, raising his eyebrows. She laughs, scrunching her nose as she shakes her head. He pulls her closer to seal the gap between them, his lips pressing passionately against hers. She answers him enthusiastically when she pulls him back onto the bed above her, a smile blooming across her face. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>FRIENDS!!!!! WE'RE ALMOST AT THE END! 😭♥️</p>
<p>I can't believe we only have a tiny epilogue left of this story, it holds such a special place in my heart and I'm so over the moon at all the lovely comments you share with me. 10 Things is one of my all time favorite movies and it has been so fun turning it into a Reylo story with my own little twist! I promise I won't get too sappy right now (I'll have to save that for the epilogue) but I just want to thank you all for your continued and constant support, it seriously means the world to me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Chapter 20</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>don't get sappy yet, you'll get that at the end</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <a href="https://imgur.com/wxgPOnh">  </a>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey drops the last of the boxes onto the floor of her new apartment, wiping the sheen of sweat from her brow. The kitchenette opens up easily to the relatively spacious living room, large windows effortlessly bringing in the natural light. Even when the walls are bare and the floor is littered with boxes she already can see the potential that this place has, a place to call her own and make however she wants. A modest one bedroom apartment in downtown Coruscant doesn’t quite feel like home yet, but she knows that it won’t take much time for it to.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>They’d finished their last semester at Kor Vella unceremoniously...and that is taken quite literally, the two of them opting to skip the graduation ceremony entirely and spend it having a backyard barbeque with their family and friends. Opulent events like that just weren't their style, but Rey made sure to acquiesce to her father's demands and wear a cap and gown for at least 10 minutes worth of pictures. It ends up being a perfect day ending with Ben holding her in his parents empty backyard hammock as the sun sets and paints the garden in a warm ambient glow. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I love you, Rey Kenobi.” he whispers after a few moments of peaceful silence. She tilts her neck to look up at him from where she’s tucked in his side, an admiring smile on her face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know.” she whispers back before giggling. He scoffs in amused surprise, turning over to face her as the hammock rocks under them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh is that so?” he challenges with a smirk. “I don’t think you do. Maybe I should give you a little reminder…” he teases, bringing his face down to the crease of her neck as his hands snake around her waist to tickle her. Rey begins to shriek with laughter, squirming next to him until their combined movements eventually topple them over the edge of the hammock and into the grass. Ben falls with a loud thud as Rey lands on top of him, both of them groaning before bursting into relentless laughter. He wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her closer to him, tilting himself up to capture his lips in hers. And for those few moments Rey doesn’t care about the past or the future, because to be honest the present is pretty fucking great.</p>
<p> </p>
<ul>

</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>“Where do you want me to put these, Rey?” Dr. Kenobi asks from the kitchen, holding up a stake of white ceramic plates. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Dad, I promise we can handle moving all that little stuff ourselves.” she quips with a chuckle, coming over to lean her hip against the counter. “I promise you’ve done enough work.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know…” he begins with a stutter. “I just....I want to make sure that…” She can feel her father’s voice breaking at the impending emotions so she instinctively walks up and hugs him, pressing her face into his chest. He lets out a slightly surprised sigh, but squeezes her tight in their embrace. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m so proud of you, darling. Your mother would be <em> so </em> proud.” he whispers wistfully into her hair. Rey looks up at her father and smiles with a nod, trying not to let any rogue tears escape her eyes. They’ve developed a newfound understanding with each other, her father now trusting her to be the responsible young woman he raised her to be. And she will do well to keep that promise, to make him and her mother proud.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Oh God, is Dad crying <em> again</em>?” Kaydel huffs, entering the room holding one side of a coffee table. Ben emerges holding the other side, a soft smile on his face when he sees them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Cut him some slack, Kay. He’s just thinking about how he’s still stuck living with you.” Ben scoffs sarcastically, earning a yelp of indignation and a light slap on his shoulder from Kaydel once they’ve put the table down.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s rich coming from you, Solo. You’re the one stuck with <em> her </em> now.” Kaydel quips back, crossing her arms over her chest with a smirk. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Alright, that’s enough of that.” Dr. Kenobi chuckles. “Let’s hit the road, we’ll let you both get settled in. Call me tomorrow.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Bye, Dad. Bye, Kay.” Rey says as she hugs them both. “Thank you...for everything.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben goes to hug Kaydel and then shake hands with her father, Dr. Kenobi giving him an extra pat on the shoulder and a knowing look before leaving. Once the door closes behind them, the room is silent...almost peaceful. They each let out a content sigh, flopping onto the couch as Ben wraps an arm around Rey’s shoulders. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Holy shit.” she breathes. “We’re really doing this.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We’re really doing this.” he confirms softly, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Any regrets?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She turns her whole body to face him, cupping his face with her hands. “Never.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Good.” he smirks, leaning in to kiss her. She hums and nibbles against his lips, the two of them finding it impossible not to smile into the kiss. “Because I can’t wait to christen every single room and surface in this place with you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A heated flush spreads across her cheeks, her heart beating rapidly out of her chest. God, she'll never get tired of that gorgeously filthy mouth of his. “Is that so?” she mutters with a smirk. “Where do you propose we start?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She has no time to act before he’s scooping her up bridal style, bring his face impossible closer to hers as he quirks an eyebrow. "<em>Our </em> bedroom.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey can’t help but cackle at how dramatic he's stomping his way through their mess of boxes, almost tripping over a particularly large one before kicking their bedroom door open. All they’ve managed to set up in here is nothing but a simple mattress on a box spring and their bedside table; Ben gently tossing her on it as she bounces between giggles, his large warm body climbing up to cage her in. They revere each other for a moment, so many words passing between silent glances and longing kisses as they take the time to explore each other's bodies and souls. It’s not the most romantic setting, but after the loneliness and heartache in their lives alone, it’s more than perfect together. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>ok NOW it's time to get sappy.</p>
<p>wow, I seriously can't even begin to express how much I've loved writing this story. 10 Things I Hate About You is one of my all time favorite movies, so I'm so glad I was able to give it the Reylo treatment with a little extra flair. Your constant support and kind words have seriously blown me away, I can't believe that anyone likes my writing enough to be as amazing as you all have been. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for coming with me on this journey.</p>
<p>If you like this story and are sad that it's over, fear not! I have plenty of completed stories, as well as a few wips available and on the way. I seriously find so much joy in writing so I will continue to provide some good vibes and happy endings for as long as you want me!</p>
<p>You can also follow me on twitter @blessedreylo, I tweet a lot of nonsense and even post some textfics every now and again so let's be friends! </p>
<p>Until next time! ♥️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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